Don't say I didn't warn you, babe.
Welcome to Python.
2
Out and About - New York City
Bringing you the skinny on the hottest attractions in and around Gotham…
Today Out and About New York City takes you to the club that's become the hottest sensation in the five boroughs.
Sitting in a nondescript section of Long Island City in Queens, among warehouses and industrial areas that are just in the process of being gentrified, is New York City's hottest club.
Welcome to Python.
But, while some of the clubs across the East River might be exclusive, Python takes it to a whole new level.
If you're a man, only one word. Fuhgeddaboudit.
That's right.
Python's owner, Austin Price doesn't allow in any men through the front door as guests. The club caters strictly to a female clientele. But where they don't take men as guests, they employ mostly men as entertainers.
And it's no wonder why it's women only.
Because if these women let their boyfriends and husbands see what goes on in this club, there's no way they'd ever be allowed to go back in again.
First off, Out and About wasn't even allowed to send a male photographer.
We had to send a woman.
And after the first night, she had to go back again.
In fact, she's been back to Python every night since.
"There's something there for everyone," a club-goer commented. "If you want to sit back and watch the men lick each other's muscles, you're absolutely welcome to do that."
But that's not all. Not by a long shot.
"If you want to have them lick you, it's totally possible. Want to run your tongue across their abs? They let you do that too," another female partier admitted.
But that's not the real shocker.
"Got enough money? Get a private show. Or a private room, complete with it's own bed. You want to know what goes on there? Maybe you should pay the fucking dolla bills to find out, eh?" Austin Price, the owner suggested to us when we pressed him.
And pressing is just the beginning.
From the very entrance, the club is filled with stimulation that delights the senses, whether your senses favor looking, listening, smelling, touching, or even tasting.
"It's like a bar where the men go gather and look at women wearing Daisy Dukes with big knockers," one 68-year-old woman describes it. "Only in this place, it's the women staring at the beefcakes with the big dicks."
Critics have raved over the party atmosphere that Python has brought to Court Square, as bars and eateries have opened up around it to serve the diverse female clientele that frequent the place.
"The neighborhood has been transformed entirely," City Councilman Rod Serling said when asked about the establishment. "It's economically revitalized the area for sure."
All this is nothing new to Austin Price, the one time porn star turned entrepreneur.
"All we're here to do at the end of the day," he says to us with a winning smile, "is to please women. Is there anything so wrong with that?"
We don't think so. And we're pretty sure neither will you.
Python Nightclub
Located at 21-30 Varick Street
Court Square, New York 11104
Hours: 12:00 pm to 5:00 am
Days: 7 Days A Week
Cover: Yes
Cost: $$$
Stars: Five
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Destiny
Some books are so fucking hot that you should wear gloves while handling them. No, I’m not talking about Alexis Angel. I mean, everyone reads her, but she can only do so much. But there’s also smut that’s published by guys—the ones that leave you boiling from the inside out—your pussy becoming a literal faucet. Sure, they’re a mess when it comes to the laundry bill, but what's a girl gonna do? I mean, can you say drippy, babe? Because that’s what I am right fucking now.
Growing up, my teachers always told me that I should read more, and I actually took their advice to heart. I guess they’d prefer me to read the classics, but hey, in my heart Eddie Cleveland is a modern classic, okay?
What? I mean, who else could make me this wet for a woodsman? A freakin’ woodsman. Sometimes I wish I could be saved by one as well.
Sadly, there are no woodsmen around New York City, especially not Manhattan. Especially if we take into account that we’re inside a strip club. My strip club—in case you didn’t realize it with the flashing red letters outside, the ones that read Dirty Destiny.
And yeah, I’m Destiny. Actually, my name is Destiny Renee, but everyone just calms me Destiny around here. And what’s with the ‘Dirty’ part? Well… I mean, this is a strip club, so the name seemed fitting, I guess. I swear babe, I’m not rolling my eyes. I’m actually really glad you’re here and I absolutely love it that you wanted to spend some time with me. I can be a bit abrasive and aloof at times, let me just let you know. So please don’t mind me. And honestly, I’ll try to be a bit more patient. Anyways, where were we? Oh right. Dirty, why the dirty, right? Well, the club name seemed to fit. And I like to think I’m a dirty, dirty girl.