Pushing the Limits(51)

"Thank you," I say softly, shutting the door to my car.

"I'll follow you home," he says. When I look back up at him, his expression softens. "Help you carry them inside."

I only nod in agreement before turning back toward the car and getting inside.

I thank him again once he sets the boxes inside my apartment. I offered to carry one, but he batted my hands away.

"Feel better, Aspen," he says, sincerity in his eyes. "I'll let  Christine know you made it home safely." He winks, a friendly smile  spreading over his face.

"Thank you, Shane."

"Anytime."





CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR

MORGAN



Having Aspen to myself for most of the week has been absolutely  incredible. Waking up next to her, eating breakfast together, spending  the day in bed watching Netflix and laughing with each other …

I feel like a lovesick teen all over again.

The worst part is her having to go into work, but since it's Saturday,  Natalia and I get to spend some quality time together. We're going to  ‘drop by' the gallery for a bit, go out for lunch, and whatever else she  decides we have to do.

"Are you ready?" I call out as I lean against the front door, waiting for her. "I thought you were just putting some shoes on?"

"I'm looking for my purse! Just give me a minute." She shuffles around some things on her desk.

"A purse?" I ask mostly to myself. "You're eleven. You don't need a purse."

She finally walks out with a bag in her hand. "I'm a girl. I have stuff."

My brows furrow as my lips curl up in an amused smile. "What kind of  stuff could you possibly have? Pantyhose? Lipstick? Diary?" I tease.

She rolls her eyes as she walks past me and out the door. "You have so much to learn, Uncle Morgan."

She says it so dramatically I can't help but laugh. "Trust me, Shorty. I know."

We arrive and Natalia nearly jumps out of the car before I even put the  gear into park. I practically chase her all the way in, hollering at her  to slow down, but she's so excited and doesn't even hear me.

I told Aunt Mel we'd be coming, so she's already waiting for us at the  front entrance. She absolutely adores Natalia and is super stoked to  show her around.

"Good morning!" I hear her cheerful voice as she wraps her arms around Nat.

"Morning!" I come up behind them and wrap an arm around her shoulder  with a squeeze. "She's extremely excited in case you haven't noticed."

"I have!" She smiles wide. "I'm so glad you brought her. We're going to  have a blast!" She winks down at Natalia and grabs her hand.

This is my chance to go find Aspen, so I casually excuse myself for a  moment. "I'll catch up with you two in a bit. I'm going to use the  restroom."

"Okay, just find us when you're done," Aunt Mel calls over her shoulder.  They've already started walking toward one of the exhibits when I start  scanning the room for Aspen.

I continue looking around, but can't find her anywhere. I want to ask  where she is without sounding suspicious, but I'm not sure that's  possible.

I grab my phone out of my pocket and text her. Hey, Nat and I came to visit. Where are you?

I'm not sure if she'll have her phone on her or not, but it's worth a  try. I catch back up with Aunt Mel and Natalia as they're walking  through the Forty under Forty exhibit. It must be one of their new ones  because I've haven't seen these before.

"How are things going?" I casually ask, stuffing my hands in my pockets.

"Good!" Natalia spins around, her face glowing with excitement. "It's so  beautiful here. Makes me want to draw something myself."

"Good eye for art must run in the family," Aunt Mel says with a wink. I  haven't told anyone other than Aspen that I haven't painted in months,  so everyone assumes I'm still doing it.

"I could get you your own art supplies, Shorty," I offer. "I also have a bunch in the basement that you can use."

"Really?" Her eyes widen as her lips tilt up high enough to reach her  bright eyes. "I'd love that!" She wraps her arms around my waist and  squeezes. I've never seen her this excited before.

We continue walking around, and I casually look around for Aspen. I see  Christine, but still no Aspen. She walks up to Aunt Mel and flashes a  small smile.         

     



 

"Shane followed her home. I think she'll be okay."

"Oh, thank you, darling. I feel just awful." She presses a hand over her chest.

My interest is piqued as I try to read between the lines of their conversation. "What happened?"

"Aspen received a couple packages from her mom that were upsetting, something about journals, so she went home for the day."

My blood pressure rises the moment she says her name and mentions her  mother. I don't know exactly what happened, but I know their  relationship is rocky at best.

"Aunt Mel, can Natalia stay here with you? I have to run somewhere  quick. I'm sorry." I kiss Natalia on the head and not so subtly run out  before she can bombard me with questions.

I fly out the front doors and call her cell, but it goes straight to  voicemail. I try again as soon as I'm in the car and drive out of the  parking lot.

Voicemail. Fuck.

I speed to Aspen's apartment, unable to focus on anything other than  her. I've seen her break down on a number of occasions, her anxiety  triggered from far less than situations like this.

Once I'm inside, I jog up the stairs two at a time. I'm panting as I  arrive at her door, ready to knock it down as I hear blasting music  coming from the inside. I knock on the door but turn the knob anyway.  There's no way she can hear me over the music.

Stepping inside, I immediately scan around for her. "Aspen!" I shout. "You here?"

I walk through the kitchen, to her bedroom, and back out to the living  room before I check her studio where I finally find her, notebooks  spread wildly all around her. Her knees are to her chest with her arms  wrapped around them.

"Sweetheart, what happened?" Rushing to her, she looks up at me-her eyes  red and swollen, her makeup smeared down her cheeks. She lowers her  eyes, tears streaming down her cheeks as she shakes her head.

Leaning over her, I grab the iPod connected to the speakers and shut the  music off. "Baby … " I plead. "Talk to me. Please." My voice cracks as I  beg for her to say something.

Tilting her face up to look at me, her eyes seal shut as more tears run  down. Her breathing is calculated as she counts softly, rocking her body  back and forth.

"Aspen." My heart pounds in my chest as I watch her crumble in front of me.

"She let go," she finally chokes out, taking a deep breath. "She didn't  fall." More tears run down her cheeks as I try to comprehend what she's  talking about. "She. Let. Go." She says one final time.

Wiping her cheeks, she finally looks up at me with a numb expression on face.

"Tell me what happened." I try to keep my voice calm and not show her  that I'm dying inside seeing her like this, feeling completely helpless.

"I can't get my heart rate to slow down," she finally tells me. "I've never had an attack this badly before."

"What can I do?" I rush out in a panic. "What do you need, baby?"

"Just hold me. I have to just ride it out."

I pull her into my lap and hold her, soothing her the best that I can.  Rubbing my hand up and down her arm, she fists my shirt and cries into  my chest. My heart shatters as her body shakes with every hiccupping  sob. Pressing my lips to her forehead, I place a soft kiss and tighten  my arms around her.

We stay like that until I feel her breathing steady and the sounds of  her crying dissipate. I want to comfort her and ask what's triggered  such a bad one, but what could I possibly say that would have any value  at this point?

"Morgan … " Her voice just above a whisper.

"Yeah, baby?" I smoothly ask, brushing the hair back away from her face.

"I feel like the part of me that I had left from before she passed has  officially been ripped away from me. It's been shattered, leaving me in  broken pieces of the person I used to be."

"I'm so sorry, sweetheart." I close my eyes and take a steady breath.  "Tell me what happened. Aunt Mel said your mom sent you something?"

"She packaged up all of my sister's old journals and sketch books and sent them to me."

"Did you know she kept them all this time?"

"I didn't even know they existed." I feel her shudder against me.

"Why would your mom send them?"

"I don't know. I don't know if she read them and wanted me to read them  or if she was just cleaning stuff out and thought I'd want them. She  didn't send a note or even tell me she was sending them. She gave me no  warning at all."

"So you've been going through them since you left?"         

     



 

She nods.

"That triggered your attack?"

"I read them." Lifting her head slightly, she sniffs and wipes her cheeks off. "They're awful."