“Maybe that’s it—he’s afraid he’ll hurt the baby if you guys, uh…” Olivia coughed. “Engage in your normal form of sex.”
Lauren laughed. “We’re not that kinky, cuz. It’s not like he’s beating me with whips and chains or anything. It’s more about, you know, submission.” She blushed. “With a little bit of spanking from time to time.”
“Rrrrow,” Olivia purred, grinning. “You’re making me want to go find Baird right now to play a few discipline games. Sounds like fun.”
“It is,” Lauren admitted. “But at this point I’d settle for plain old missionary position sex. Anything to take the edge off.”
Liv raised an eyebrow at her. “Are you still eating the bonding fruit on a regular basis?”
Lauren sighed. “I’ve had to cut back some—it was too much to handle, especially when Xairn won’t come near me.”
“Well maybe you should point that out to him,” Olivia said. “In fact, have you tried talking to him at all? To get to the root of the problem?”
Lauren ran a hand through her hair in frustration. “Every time I try, he puts me off or runs away on some errand he swears can’t wait. I’ve even tried wearing my sexiest outfit to seduce him but, well…” She shrugged sadly. “No effect.”
Olivia frowned. “I bet you had a much bigger effect on him than you know, Lauren. It’s just that for some reason, Xairn is afraid to show it.” She pushed the bowl of popcorn out of the way. “No more pussy-footing around—you have to make him tell you. Lock him in your suite or tie him up or something but don’t let him go until he talks.”
Lauren felt a surge of determination. “You’re right. I’ve been trying to avoid a direct confrontation, but I guess that’s the only way I’ll ever find out what’s going on.” She sighed. “I’ve just been feeling so vulnerable lately. My biological father left my mom when she was pregnant with me, you know? I guess I was afraid if I forced Xairn to talk to me, if I pushed him too hard…” She made a helpless gesture with one hand.
Olivia nodded sympathetically. “I get why you’re worried, but you shouldn’t be. Xairn’s not going to leave you—you’ve had bonding sex, remember? Kindred mate for life, and Xairn has enough Kindred blood in him for that to apply to him too.”
“You know…you’re right.” Lauren murmured as the truth of her cousin’s words sank in. Tears of relief came to her eyes and she tried to blink them away. “God, why didn’t I think of that? I think these pregnancy hormones are making me crazy or stupid or both.” Going back to the couch, she gave Olivia a big hug. “Thank you, Liv. You’ve made me feel so much better.”
Liv hugged her back. "That's what cousins are for. So go for it, Lauren—make him talk and don't take no for an answer."
"I will," Lauren promised, and she meant it. She was going to get to the bottom of this problem with Xairn if it was the last thing she did.
Chapter Twenty-two
Lissa didn’t know how long she’d been wandering, naked and without food or water, but it must have been a long while—she was beginning to see visions.
At first it was just colored lights flashing before her eyes, which might have been just the pale green sun of First World glinting off the rainbow colored sands of the desert. But when she began to hear voices, Lissa knew something wasn’t right. Especially when the voices started talking about her—talking about her hair.
“Greeny hair, greeny hair, Lissa has the greeny hair,” they chanted in her ears.
“No…no I don’t,” Lissa protested, putting a hand to her hair protectively. It was pale blonde with deep jade-green streaks that matched her jade-green eyes —a sign that she was one of the rare Kindred females. She was relieved to find it was still long, flowing down to tickle the small of her back as she moved. But I’m supposed to cut it, she thought, feeling dazed. As a sign of respect—I’m supposed to cut it all off.
That had been the plan, anyway.
She had a knife in her other hand, a long, curving blade used to harvest grain in the small, rocky gardens of the holy mountain. It was the only thing she’d taken with her on her pilgrimage. Her plan, she remembered now, had been to walk to the middle of the desert and use the knife to chop her long hair short—as short as possible.
But the path was long and winding and the desert was hot. Luckily, Lissa knew of a few places where water came to the surface around the mountain. She’d made use of her knowledge to keep herself hydrated on the first part of her journey, just as she used her power to keep a thin layer of sand suspended above her head to act as a sun-shade. As she got deeper into the desert and further from the holy mountain of the Goddess however, her powers began to lessen and water was harder to find. Now she was barely able to keep the sand above her head aloft and she couldn’t remember the last time she’d had a drink of cool, life-giving water.