“All right, then.” Olivia squeezed Elise’s arm. “Looks like you’re going home.”
“I guess so.” Elise tried to look happy but all she could manage was a weak, wavering smile. Instead of being thrilled that her long ordeal was over and she could go back to her handsome fiancé and normal life, she felt sick with unhappiness. Get over it, she told herself roughly. What were you going to do? Give up practicing law and stay on the Mothership with a man you just met? She glanced up at Merrick—his towering height, his scarred face and mismatched eyes and thought, Yes. Yes, I would if I could.
But it was clear he didn’t want her. In fact, he wouldn’t even meet her eyes.
“Well, then.” James, on the viewscreen, was looking at her sharply. “I guess I’ll see you soon. Are you quite certain you’re all right, darling?”
“Yes,” Elise whispered and then forced herself to speak louder. “Yes, I…I’m sure.”
“Wonderful. I’ll see you within the hour.” He smiled. “I can’t wait to hold you again.”
Such a public admission of affection was huge coming from the normally reticent James. In the past it would have sent a flock of butterflies spiraling through her stomach. This time Elise felt like she’d swallowed a bar of lead. “I…I can’t wait to see you either, James,” she murmured.
He smiled again and the viewscreen went blank.
* * * * *
“Merrick? Merrick, please wait!” Elise reached for him as he was turning away. Though he hated to admit it, the touch of her soft, small hand still did things to his body. Still made him want to sweep her into his arms and hold her tight. Gritting his teeth, Merrick ignored the stupid impulse.
“What do you want?” he growled, only half turning. “I’m busy. Hell—you are, too. You gotta catch a flight back to your fiancé before you forget him again.”
“You have to believe me—I really did forget him. And I…I don’t want…” Her big brown eyes were swimming with tears. The hurt on her face stuck in his heart like a barb, but Merrick ignored it grimly.
“You don’t want what?” he demanded. “Don’t want to go back to your rich-ass fiancé? Don’t want to go back to your happy, successful life down on Earth?”
“I don’t want it to end this way,” she whispered. “I can’t…I was trying to tell him.”
“Tell him what? There’s nothing to tell.”
“You’re lying.” She lifted her chin and stared him in the eyes. “You felt it too—the connection between us. You told me so.”
“What if I did?” Merrick turned to face her fully. “Look at me, Elise.” He held out his hands, indicating the entire, rough and ugly package that was his hybrid self. “I’ve got nothing to offer you,” he said. “Nothing to my name but a modified star-duster and a nasty reputation. That guy on the viewscreen, he’s got money, power—he can give you what you want. What you need. Go home to him. It’s where you belong.”
“What if…what if I don’t belong there anymore?” she whispered. “What if I want to stay here…with you?”
Merrick’s heart fisted in his chest but he ignored it. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice and I’m a fucking idiot. “I’d say that’s too damn bad,” he growled, giving her his best blank face. “Since I’m not staying.”
“But…then where will you go?” Her brown eyes were wide with apprehension.
“Away.” Merrick made a sweeping gesture with one arm. “Anywhere away from here. And there’s only room on my ship for one. Me.”
“Fine.” She dashed the tears from her eyes angrily and stood up straight. “If that’s the way you want to be.”
“Wanting has nothing to do with it.” Merrick laughed harshly. “It’s the way I am.”
“So…I guess this is it.” She took a deep breath. “This is goodbye. We—we’ll probably never see each other again.”
“Probably not.” Merrick shrugged, as though completely unconcerned though his insides felt frozen. “The universe is a big fucking place.”
Elise bit her lip, the anger fading from her face. “All right, I guess I can accept that. But if this is the end, can I…can I at least hug you goodbye?”
He could tell what it cost her to make the request—how it hurt her pride to beg for that one simple thing—for a last bit of comfort and contact. But his own heart was hurting too—wounded and aching, though he didn’t want to admit it, even to himself.