Pursued(24)
“What, you mean the pain vine?” Merrick sounded incredulous. “The one that grows only in the inner jungle? The plant that’s sacred to the Ancient Ones—that they guard with their fucking lives?”
“I’m afraid so.” Sylvan shifted uncomfortably. “A branch of the vine must be plucked by your own hand—yours or Elise's anyway—and brought back to be placed in the same stasis chamber Elise was held in. Once we hold it in stasis for awhile, it can be taken out and the berries will make a compound which dissolves the artificial bond between the two of you.” He shook his head. “Only then will you be free of each other.”
“What if I don’t want to be fucking free?” Merrick demanded belligerently. “What if I like things the way they are just fine?”
Sylvan looked at Elise. “Will you excuse us for a minute?”
“Certainly,” she said, feeling numb. She slid off the exam table and stumbled, nearly going to her knees. The only thing that saved her was Merrick—his strong hand under her arm held her up, keeping her from collapsing in a heap on the floor.
Even that brief skin-to-skin touch on her bare arm seemed to strengthen her but Elise knew it was wrong. Though it hurt her heart to do so, she shook off his hand and stood on her own.
“Elise…” Merrick’s face was stiff, immobile—but she could hear the hurt in his deep voice. Somehow she forced herself to ignore it.
“Thanks, but I’m fine,” she said, nodding stiffly. “If you’ll excuse me, I’m going to step outside for a minute.” Keeping her chin high and her back straight, she walked out of the exam room, shutting the door quietly behind her.
The med station around her was a hive of activity with nurses and doctors buzzing quietly but briskly about their tasks. There were several other exam rooms arranged in a circle around the central area which was filled with counters and equipment but the doors were shut, indicating that they were occupied.
Elise looked around desperately. She just needed to find a quiet spot to herself for a moment. A spot to break down and cry—to mourn the impending loss she felt to the bottom of her soul. And yes, now she believed she had one because it ached—ached so deeply she thought she might die of the pain.
Finally she spied an empty room—a supply closet filled with fresh sheets, gowns, and cleaning supplies—and slipped into it as quietly and unobtrusively as she could. Then the strength she’d forced herself to feel suddenly gave out and she sank to the floor with her head in her hands.
“Merrick…” she whispered. “Oh, Merrick, I’m so sorry…”
* * * * *
“Merrick, listen to me—you have to dissolve this bond! It’s not healthy for Elise and it’s Goddess-damned dangerous for you as well.”
“I don’t care,” Merrick said stubbornly, crossing his arms over his chest. “I’ve never felt this way for a female before, Sylvan. I don’t want to lose it. I don’t want to lose her.”
“And what if you die of soul sickness from an improperly attached bond?” Sylvan asked harshly. “What do you think will happen to Elise then? Without your touch, she’ll sicken and die too, Merrick. She’s dependent on you—too dependent. A Kindred male and his mate can survive the death of the other—they may not want to live, but they can physically continue. The way you and Elise are linked, your death would mean hers too. It’s not right or fair to tie her to you in such a permanent, terminal way.”
Merrick let out a deep breath as reality set in. “I…I guess you’re right. I wasn’t thinking of it like that.”
“I know how you were thinking, old friend.” Sylvan’s voice was filled with compassion. “I feel the same thing for Sophia. I love her so much I’d rather die than be without her. But if I knew being with her might hurt her—if I knew my death would cause hers as well…”
“You’d leave her, even if it hurt,” Merrick finished for him glumly. “Yeah, I get it.”
“It’s not good for either of you, this artificial bond,” Sylvan said. “It will only make you sick and Elise completely physically dependent on you. She’s a strong, independent female, Merrick. Do you think that’s how she wants to live?”
“No. No, of course not.” Merrick sighed and ran a hand over his skull-cut hair. “I know what you’re saying makes sense—to my head anyway. My heart…well, it’s another story.”
“I know,” Sylvan said gently. “And I’m so very sorry. But listen, Merrick, there’s no saying that once you dissolve the artificial bond you can’t form a new one—a natural one—with her.”