"It's not that, Nate. I just don't usually date, is all."
I look up into her beautiful eyes and gauge my response. She wants to go – or at least I think she wants to - but something is holding her back. Something is always holding her back. And I'll be damned if I don't vow to get to the bottom of it.
"We still have almost three weeks. Consider it an open invitation if you want to go, okay?"
"That sounds nice. Thank you," she says with another small smile.
We finish off our dinner in relative silence. After I pay the bill, I take Lia by the hand and head towards the parking lot. Outside, there is little noise as most of Rivers Edge is home and locked up inside the cool confines of their houses. The humidity has been high for the last several days and doesn't look like it's going to be letting up anytime soon.
When we reach my car, I pull Lia against my body. She comes willingly and threads her arms around my waist. I feel her perky breasts flatten against my chest and her breathing has a slight hitch in it. Hell, my breathing practically becomes erratic. Lia strokes her hands up and down my back as we continue to hold each other.
"Where do you want to go?" I whisper into the evening air.
"Can we go to the creek?" she whispers back.
I smile against her head as I picture my spot with her in it. "Of course we can," I say as I place a hard kiss on her forehead. Lia slides into my car, and we set out for my quiet creek bank spot about ten miles outside of town.
As I'm driving down the road – hell, before I even pull out of the parking lot next to El Toro – I link my fingers within hers. Touching her has quickly become a lifeline. It's as necessary as eating, drinking, and breathing. I don't think I've held hands since Jill and that was over a decade ago. I've never felt the need, the desire. But Lia makes me feel all of that, and if I'm being brutally honest, she makes me feel so much more. That terrifies the shit out of me.
When I pull the Mustang into the drive, I quickly hop out and unlock the chain restricting access. The moonlight shines through the windshield illuminating Lia in the front seat. The sight just about brings me to my knees. Her beautiful eyes are following my progress as I stroll back towards the car.
How is it possible to want this woman, need this woman, with such a ferocious intensity that it practically renders me speechless, stupid, and immobile all at the same time? I've known this woman for a matter of days. A week. But it feels like I've known her forever. I want to worship her body with my own. I want to hold her tight and show her that nothing will ever hurt her. I want to protect her. For the first time in more than a decade, I might want more.
Isn't that a kicker? My life isn't conducive to a wife, children, and white picket fences. I've made peace with that lifestyle or so I've thought. So, why the hell am I dreaming of more with Lia? Because the "more" that I'm envisioning is a hell of a lot more than just throwing her over my shoulder and pleasuring her body all night long. No, it's so much more. Fuck.
Guys in my line of work do it all the time, I understand that. They have the family at home, the dog, the mortgage, and the baseball practices. But, I've seen what happens when the wife receives that knock on the door, telling her that her husband is never coming home again. I've held the hysterical woman while she screams for her husband and ignores the truth. I can't do it. I won't do it. If I love someone enough, I have to let them go to live their own life.
I slip back inside the car and drive along the path. I park next to the shack and walk around to help Lia out. With her hand securely inside of mine, I lead her towards the old building so we can get the chairs. It's the perfect summer night to sit outside. Sure, a little on the humid side, but humidity has never really bothered me before. And apparently, it doesn't bother Lia too much either.
Once the chairs are sitting in the dirt as close as possible along the creek bank, Lia and I both relax and enjoy the quiet. Crickets chirp and frogs croak. The occasional fish jumps in the shallow water of the creek.
"When you were little, what was your dream?" I ask, breaking the silence that has surrounded us for the past ten minutes or so.
Lia is quiet for several beats before responding. "When I was little, I wanted to be a teacher," she says.
"A teacher? I can see that."
"I wanted to teach early education like preschool or kindergarten. There was something magical about connecting with children and helping them learn to become better adults. When I was young, I used to sit in my little room and teach the few stuffed animals or dolls that I had. I'd set them on my bed and teach them everything I had just learned from my own teacher."
Lia leans over and places her hand inside of mine. It's like she finds comfort in my touch. Maybe even strength. I sense that she's had a rough past, I can see it in the way she avoids talking about it. I sense that there is so much more to Lia than what meets the eye.
"What about you? What was your dream when you were younger?"
"I've always wanted to be a fireman for as far back as I can remember. I used to talk Jake into setting fire to small piles of brush in the backyard. Then, I'd swoop in with my bucket of water or the garden hose and put them out. I was all of ten years old, maybe."
"I can definitely see you running around with that cute little hat on and pretending to be a firefighter," Lia says with a smile.
"I owned that damn hat. Got me all the chicks in elementary school," I chuckle.
Lia laughs from the seat next to me. "Maybe you'll have to show me the hat and let me be the judge of that," she replies. The air around us crackles. The laughter and the lightness fade away. In its place is smoldering ambers of desire, waiting for that little spark to ignite the entire place, sending it up in flames.
"I'll tell you what, next time you're in St. Charles, stop by the firehouse and I'll show you my hat." I lean closer, my mouth just a whisper away from her ear. I can smell the flowers in her shampoo and the sweetness of her lotion. "If you're a good girl, I'll even show you my pole."
Lia makes a noise; a throaty choking sound that shoots straight to my groin. The air is so thick, it's a struggle to suck each breath into my lungs. I lean just a fraction of an inch closer until my mouth is touching her ear. "And don't forget about my hose. I have lots and lots of hose," I whisper as my breath fans out against her.
Lia turns ever so slightly until I can see her wild eyes. Eyes that are filled with raging desire. The deep gray swirls around like a tornado, ready to devour anything or anyone in its path. And I am the luckiest son of a bitch to be standing smack dab in the center of the trail.
My lips seek hers out entirely on their own like magnets drawn together. With a single swipe of my tongue, Lia opens her mouth for me, sucking my tongue in hard and fast. If I was a lesser man, I would have lost it right then and there in my shorts. Lia's hands dive into my hair. The feel of her nails digging into my scalp almost sends me completely over the edge. She scratches down the back of my neck as we continue to dual with our mouths and tongues.
When she reaches my back, my muscles tighten against her nails causing her to dig in deeper. She can mark me all she wants, just as long as she never stops. I flex my back muscles again and she lets out the sexiest moan I've ever heard. I swallow the noise as I cradle her against my hard body and lie her down in what little grass we have along the creek bank.
I rise up momentarily and take in the sight before me. Lia's long, brown hair is fanned out around her head, her breathing is coming in quick, loud pants, and her nipples are peaked and pressing hard against the cotton of her sundress. She's the sexiest fucking woman I've ever seen. Ever.
I drop back down to her lips and devour her with another scorching kiss. Lia's hands return to my back. She pushes my shirt upward until I feel her hot hands on bare skin, which makes me shiver at the contact. She pushes the shirt up and over my head. Her hands drop the shirt and return to my back. Her nails continue to bite and claw at my sensitive skin. It's the most delicious pain I've ever experienced.
I reach down and grab my discarded shirt and lift up her hips, spreading it down on the ground beneath her. I'm not so much of a bastard that I will take her in the dirt, but I will make Lia feel pleasure. No, our first time will be in a house, a room. Somewhere where I can lay her out and feast on her body. Tonight, this is all about Lia forgetting everything else and just feeling.