“And you’re outta here,” the manager ground out, snatching the dart off my forehead. He helped me to my feet and marched me to the front of the store, right through the doors onto the shoveled sidewalk.
“If it helps, I’m sorry,” I said in a tiny voice.
“It doesn’t. Don’t come back, ever.” He slammed the door in my face.
What was I supposed to do now, and where the heck was Dylan? It was all his fault that I was in this predicament. Playing like a child at thirty. What had I been thinking? I made such stupid choices when I was around a guy I was attracted to. A perfect reminder why I had to steer clear of men in general. I zipped up my Eskimo parka and stood shivering on the sidewalk, ready to kill him.
Ten minutes later, he strolled out, his arms filled with packages. “I can’t believe you got us kicked out of Toys-R-Us,” he said, not even trying to hide his grin.
“You... You... I can’t believe you did that to me,” I sputtered.
He took my arm and steered me toward the parking lot. “Did what? You’re the one who went wee-wee on the store manager.”
“I did not go wee-wee on anyone. It was a doll, and it was water. Oh, you know darn well what it was. And last I checked, you were ahead of him. You must have jumped into the next aisle on purpose, knowing I would think he was you.” I groaned. “I can’t believe I did that. Why couldn’t my aim have been off that time?”
“Trust me, that guy deserves to have someone annoy him. He calls our precinct at least once a day with complaints, bugging the crap out of everyone. Wait until I tell the guys downtown.” A strangled laugh escaped through Dylan’s nose, until he finally let loose and doubled over. “Anyone who didn’t see you blast his balls with that doll must really think he wet his pants.”
I couldn’t help it. A giggle bubbled up from some naughty child within, until I laughed as hard as he did. Wiping the tears from my eyes, I leaned against Big Betty to catch my breath. “Seriously, though, that was a very bad thing to do.”
“That’s right, and I hope you’ve learned your lesson.” His eyes filled with mischief. “Don’t mess with the best, because you’re never going to win.”
I opened my mouth to argue, but he ducked inside the car and unlocked my door. Finding myself grinning despite his outrageous comments, I slid into my seat and shut the door. “We never did buy a baby gift,” I pointed out, still smiling.
“You’re right. We bought several,” he answered with a chuckle, pointing to the back seat. “One Torpedo Dart Gun--minus a dart, one empty Spider Man Web Blaster, one half-loaded Giant Millennium Super Soaker, and one very wet Wee-Wee Diana.”
“Gloria’s going to kill us,” I said.
“Let’s just hope Wee-Wee Diana’s all tapped out.”
We both laughed and remained smiling for the rest of the ride back to my apartment. Tonight, Super Cop had seemed like a regular guy. A guy who was compassionate and sensitive, who had a wonderful rapport with children, yet could be a child himself with his easy-going humor and playfulness. A guy I’d never known existed.
A guy I had no idea what to do with.
***
“What am I going to do, Gloria? You know what I went through back home. I don’t need this right now.” I curled my bare legs up under me on the worn-out couch and sipped my Saturday morning coffee, the rich aroma filling my senses. I wore my standard T-shirt and panties sleepwear. I couldn’t bring myself to wear the green silk nightie I’d bought, because it reminded me too much of Hot Britches.
Gloria usually slept in on Saturday mornings, but she was too keyed up from the success of her gig last night. There’d been an agent in the audience who’d given her his card, saying he was interested in talking to her about representation. I was thrilled for her, really, I was. But we’d talked for the last hour about her. Now, it was my turn. I needed help.
“So forget about him, simple as that.” She poured herself another cup and joined me on the couch, her silk pajamas whispering all the way. Then snatched the afghan off the back cushion and tossed it over her legs.
“I tried. And failed.” I sighed, shivering. An early morning chill had settled around us, so I pulled a corner of her blanket over my lap and continued. “I was completely content in giving up on the male species, then bam, I meet Hot Britches. Now, I’m totally confused. He seems so perfect, I have to keep reminding myself that he’s obsessed with sex.”
“Excuse me, how many times have you had sex with Dylan?” She arched a brow.
“Well, none, but--”