But eventually, I get control over myself, and I slowly pull back. She looks up at me, not sure of what’s happening.
“This is your punishment,” I say softly.
Recognition enters her eyes and she gives me a sly smile. “You heard about that.”
“You’ve been bad. Very bad.” I reach forward and take her hair, kneeling down next to the bed. “You could have embarrassed me, you know.”
“I’m sorry,” she says. “I’ve just been so lonely.”
I watch her for a second, but I don’t feel anger, which surprises me.
It’s true that she could have embarrassed me. My position isn’t the kind of thing that allows for that kind of public display. I’m not exactly famous, but there are people in this world who would love to get a scoop on me and possibly destroy me. I do have to be careful, and Aria risked that by throwing her things into the street.
But I don’t feel anger. I gently release her hair, realizing that I feel more alive and excited than I have in a long time. It’s stupid and risky, but maybe I need stupid and risky sometimes.
“Don’t do it again,” I say.
“I won’t. I promise.”
“Good.” I stand up.
“But please,” she says. “Visit me more. Don’t leave me alone in here. The walks are nice but... they’re not enough.”
I stare at her for a moment and I get another glimpse of her genuine self. I can see it written all over her face. She’s desperate for more attention.
And I want to give it to her. The out-of-control feeling I get around her maybe isn’t as bad as I first thought. Maybe it feels pretty damn good, actually. I just need to be careful.
But she’s mine, my pet, and I have to make sure that she’s happy. I screwed up by leaving her alone, but I’ll make up for that.
“I promise,” I say. “I won’t leave you alone for too long again.”
She smiles and looks relieved. “Thank you.”
“Go back to sleep. I’ll see you soon.”
She nods and I turn away, walking over to the chair. I grab my jacket and toss it over my shoulder before looking back at her.
She’s sitting up in bed, watching me with wide, gorgeous, innocent eyes. She’s flushed from getting off and she’s biting her lip, clearly confused about what just happened. Her hair is messy and her shirt is slightly askew. She looks more beautiful than I’ve ever seen her before.
I turn and leave, knowing full well that I’ll be back very soon. I can’t stay away from her. I have about three more weeks left with her, and I’ll be damned if I waste anymore of that time.
I head back to my room, unable to get her taste from my mouth, and happy that it won’t leave.
14
Aria
I wake up early, still buzzing with excitement. Last night almost feels like a dream, and if it weren’t for the fact that the curtains are still drawn open, I might even think it really was.
But I know it wasn’t. Ethan came to me in the middle of the night, woke me up, and gave me the best orgasm of my life. I’m still floating high from it. That orgasm was better than any shot of heroin I ever took, because it couldn’t kill me and because there was a promise of more.
I can already see myself getting addicted to him. That was one of the most intense and erotic moments in my life, if not the most. I stretch and yawn, still thinking about his touch, and about his kiss.
I didn’t expect his kiss. I was beginning to think he didn’t want to get intimate with me in that way. But when he did kiss me, it shot a bolt of lightning through my core. I felt like I was floating on air again, ready to give myself to him even more.
I sigh and roll onto my side. I look up and out the window and can just see the tops of the buildings across the street. Cars drive by down below and I think I can hear people talking. I’m not sure what time it is, but I’m guessing it’s still pretty early based on the way the sun is shining.
I can’t help but think about something he said to me. When I begged him to fuck me, he said that I wasn’t ready. I didn’t understand what he meant, and still don’t.
I am ready. I don’t think he knows how much I actually want him. I thought I’d fuck him and it would just be like doing a job. Maybe I’d enjoy it a little bit, but in the end it would just be work. This isn’t like that, though.
I genuinely want him. If I weren’t getting paid, I’d still want him. If he were just some poor man with no money and no prospects, I’d still want him. I am ready for it, and frankly, I need it. But he’s still holding back from me, and I’m not totally sure why.