***
He let the pounding of his feet on pavement quiet his brain. It was just a dream, but he couldn’t convince himself that it was meaningless. Harper wasn’t Karen. And that was the problem.
He chose his route at random, pushing himself. He focused on the speed, his breath. Houses with full driveways passed in a blur and gave way to the closed storefronts of Main Street. He turned down a street and then another until the buildings were replaced with trees and headstones.
The cemetery. Of course his subconscious had brought him to Karen. Luke slowed his pace and let the skinny ribbon of asphalt carry him to her.
There was a small, festive pumpkin resting against the black granite of her stone. Probably Joni’s work.
Joni.
Try as he might, he couldn’t keep his past in the past. She was a constant reminder of the life he once had. The life he would never get back. He didn’t understand her blossoming relationship with Harper. Was she trying to replace the daughter she lost?
Didn’t she know that Karen was irreplaceable?
He laid a hand on the stone, warm from the morning sun. “Happy Thanksgiving, Kare.”
***
She allowed herself ten minutes between timers to run upstairs to change. The Garrisons kept it casual to the point of pajama pants and elastic waistbands for the holiday. It was a tradition she could get behind. She dragged on yoga pants and a soft, stretchy v-neck sweater the color of cranberries.
If only Luke would come around. She was more worried than she cared to admit. The anger in his tone, in his eyes, scared her and pissed her off. If he wasn’t willing to talk about it, how could she help?
The doorbell rang at the same time the oven timer buzzed. Harper wiped a stray tear from her face with a tea towel. She would not give in to the strong desire she had to kick Luke’s ass today. Maybe tomorrow.
She couldn’t ignore the periodic silences and the gulfs of distance that cropped up between them anymore. Something was wrong and it needed to be addressed. She only hoped it was something fixable. She loved that man so much it shook her to the core. And when he hurt, she hurt.
Harper turned off the timer, squared her shoulders, and welcomed Luke’s family into his home.
They entered en masse, Claire, Charlie, James, Ty, Sophie, and Josh. Making themselves at home in the kitchen and living room carting in food, sneaking tastes. Charlie turned the game on the TV while Josh and the dogs took turns chasing each other through the kitchen and dining room.
She told everyone Luke was out for a run to make up for the thirty pounds of food he planned to eat. Everyone seemed to buy it.
When Luke returned, sweaty and exhausted, Harper painted a bright smile on her face and avoided him in the kitchen. She wanted to be supportive, and stabbing him with a meat fork in front of his family would not be supportive.
She was thankful that his greetings to everyone seemed genuine. He hoisted Josh up on his shoulders and gave his mother a peck on the cheek. He hip-checked Sophie on his way to the refrigerator where he grabbed beers for himself and Charlie and James. Ty was on call.
Luke avoided eye contact with her, which was fine with Harper. She breathed a sigh of relief when he headed upstairs to shower again.
Joni arrived at the same time as Gloria, Aldo, and Mrs. Moretta. Thankful for the chaos of a full house, Harper stayed in the kitchen and directed her new team of helpers. Luke mainly stayed in the living room with everyone else.
She couldn’t tell if he was avoiding her or Joni. Or, more likely, both.
She caught him watching her once. Joni handed over her green bean casserole and a handwritten recipe card. “It was my mother’s,” Joni said with a sentimental smile. “I’d like another generation to continue the tradition.
Overcome, Harper hugged her. Her first family recipe during her first family holiday. She saw Claire smiling at them across the island and felt another gaze leveled in her direction. Luke stood in the doorway, a look of shock on his face.
Their eyes met and held. Harper released Joni from the hug and Luke grabbed another beer out of the fridge before hightailing it down the hallway.
No one else seemed to notice the tension. Not even during lunch when Harper chose a seat at the opposite end of the table from Luke.
While everyone went back for seconds — and, in James’ and Ty’s cases, thirds — Harper pushed turkey and mashed potatoes around her plate. It all tasted like gravy-covered packing peanuts to her.
Luke didn’t touch much on his plate, either, preferring to refill his wine glass instead.
Conversation flew around them.
Gloria and Aldo teased each other with forkfuls of stuffing while Mrs. Moretta and Sophie argued good-naturedly about organic vegetables.
“When Aldo was growing up, he ate all the pesticide-laden broccoli I put in front of him and turned out just fine,” Mrs. Moretta, in her best turkey sweater, snickered.