“Of course it’s mine. And God, it’s a mess.”
Lucas started laughing and didn’t stop even when Matthew shoved him. Finally, Lucas wiped his eyes. “Oh, how the mighty have fallen.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” His brother’s face might actually be improved with a good slug to the jaw.
Still sniggering, Lucas crossed his arms. “May I remind you of what you said to me about Cia? I believe you accused me of getting a one-night stand pregnant and self-righteously informed me that accidents happen.”
His stomach twisted as he vaguely recalled saying something asinine to that effect. “Is it too late to apologize?”
“Nah.” Lucas grinned. “No apology needed. It’s nice to know you’re human like the rest of us. Where is she now? Did you have a fight or something?”
“Worse. She threw my marriage proposal back in my face and took off with her friends.”
“That sucks.” Lucas whistled in disbelief. “Women. Can’t live with ’em, can’t shoot ’em.”
Matthew had made it sound like Evangeline was a flighty, irresponsible girl who didn’t understand what she’d given up, which was completely unfair and not representative of how badly the whole thing had gone down.
“I guess I didn’t actually propose.”
Lucas’s eyebrows rose. “What did you do then?”
“Told her we were getting married.” Out loud, it sounded even worse than it did in his head. “It made sense, you know? You marry a woman you get pregnant. Instead, she’s talking about lawyers and custody arrangements.”
“Geez, are you that clueless?” Lucas huffed out a disgusted breath. “No wonder she dumped you. You don’t have a romantic bone in your body, obviously. How in the world did you score with Eva?”
That bristled the hair on the back of Matthew’s neck. “I didn’t score with her. It wasn’t like that. We had something—” Special. Meaningful. Unexplainable. “I don’t know. Different.”
“Different than what? Amber?”
Matthew’s throat burned, and he almost used it as an excuse to clam up. But once, he and Lucas had been close. That their bond had deteriorated was totally his fault. He wanted it back. And the first step was being honest.
“Different than anything I’ve ever experienced. Amber fit me, fit my plans. Evangeline...doesn’t.”
But she fit Matt comfortably, like a second skin. Evangeline was different—sexy, arousing, provoking and flat-out frightening.
“So? Life is what happens when you’re making other plans.”
If only it was that easy.
“Since you’re so smart, you tell me. If everything you thought you knew about yourself got flipped upside down, what would you do?” Yeah, asking what would Lucas do had gotten him into this mess. Why break tradition?
A perceptive light crept into his brother’s eyes. “Well, now. That very thing happened, as a matter of fact. When it did, I looked to my older brother and said, that’s who I want to be.”
Matthew flinched. “Me? Which part of dumping all my responsibilities in your lap did you aim to replicate?”
“Nobody blames you for that. You needed a break. But I guess you forgot the rest of that conversation the afternoon Grandpa died. You said I could be you, and you were going to go be me. I took that seriously. I stepped up because I wanted to be as successful as you.”
“I took it seriously, too.” Matthew had to chuckle at the irony. “You want to know how I got Evangeline’s attention? I pretended I was you. It worked.”
Lucas grinned. “I’ve never seduced a pop star.”
“Neither have I. I didn’t know that’s who she was at the time. All I wanted was to feel something again.” And he’d done a stellar job. He felt stupid, frustrated and out of his element. “Then bam! There she was, like an answer to a prayer, only I hadn’t prayed for that. I didn’t have any idea what to do with her.”
“Well, you must have had some idea since she’s, you know, pregnant.” Lucas ducked, but Matthew hadn’t been planning to smack him. Not right this minute, anyway.
“Yeah, I’m not going to kiss and tell. Hope you get over your disappointment real soon.” He flopped back against the pillow, exhausted. “Now she doesn’t want anything to do with me, and my kid is going to be living in Europe while I’m here. Mama is going to be so disappointed.”
“Mama? What about you? Aren’t you disappointed in yourself?”
“I didn’t need you to point that out.”