Possess(The Syndicate: Crime and Passion 1)(33)

“That can’t be, little flower,” I said.

“I’m not your little flower anymore,” she said.

I reached for her, cupped her jaw, not caring when she flinched. “You will always be that, Senna. But this”—I gestured between us as she had—“is all there can be.”

“What about what I want?”

“What do you want?”

“Everything. A family,” she finally said.

“No,” I said.

“‘No.’ It’s that easy?” she said.

“It’s that easy. You can’t have that,” I said.

“I could with someone else,” she said, lifting her eyes to mine.

“No, you can’t,” I said, my voice going deep, every inch of my body instantly alert, near bristling with anger at her words.

The very thought of it, Senna with someone else, having a family with someone else, didn’t even make me angry. Because it couldn’t happen, I wouldn’t let it.

Perhaps cruel of me, awful, but there was simply no other outcome. I couldn’t give her a family, but I wouldn’t let her have it with anyone else.

“Do you want that with someone else?” I asked.

“Would it matter if I did? Would you let it happen?”

“No,” I said.

“I don’t, Maxim. I want that with you,” she said.

“It’s not possible.”

“So that’s it?” she said. “We just go on like this?”

“Yes,” I said, but when I looked at her, I somehow knew that wouldn’t be enough.





Twenty-One





Senna



“What a lovely way to wake up,” I said as I burrowed against Maxim’s side, my breath only having just returned to normal after Maxim had used his fingers to tease a gentle climax from me.

“It is,” he said, his voice deep, still rough with disuse, his hand making slow circles across my hip.

I burrowed even closer to him and shivered as he nipped at my neck, let his hands roam my body, dropped one low to tease the moisture between my legs.

“Maxim, I’m sleepy,” I said, my eyes still sealed shut.

“Too sleepy for me, little flower?” His breath whispered along my skin as he spoke, the caress followed by his hand, featherlight against me, his touch leaving goose bumps in its wake.

“Yes. And whose fault is that?” I asked, my voice languorous with sleepiness and a smile.

He kissed me again, trailing his lips along my shoulder. “I take pride in having tired you out, but if you insist, I’ll let you sleep,” he said.

I chuckled. “How kind of you,” I said.

He kissed my lips until I opened my eyes, and when I did, the only thing I saw was the smile on his face. “Until later,” he whispered.

After I gave him a slow smile, I closed my eyes and listened as he got out of bed, the mattress shifting with the removal of his weight.

I kept them closed as he moved around the room, the sounds of his activities now familiar.

It seemed unbelievable. Only months ago we had been strangers to each other this way, had had a complicated relationship, no doubt, the most intimate of my life and I suspected of his, but this level of commitment, connection, and familiarity had not been a part of it.

It was now, though. And the connection went beyond the physical. The physical was a part of it, a big part, but it wasn’t our entire relationship, no matter what Maxim said.

I knew him in ways I had never dreamed of before, loved him with a depth I had never imagined. Had let myself think he might grow to feel the same.

The door closed, but I continued to lie there, not moving. I had told Maxim I was sleepy, and I was, but there was no time to waste.

Not today.

After a few more minutes of lying there, I peeled my eyes open and got out of bed. I showered and dressed, shaking off the remaining sluggishness, and then made my way out of the building.

I didn’t know if Adrian or one of the others followed me, but I pretended I was alone and hastily made my way to my destination and back.

It was less than a fifteen-minute trip, but the consequences of it would change everything.

When I returned, I made my way back to my room, one of the few times I’d been there in the last several months, closed the door, and then took special care to turn the lock. My body trembled as I thought of Maxim’s previous admonition, could only imagine how he would react if he came and tried to open the door now, but the need for privacy outweighed any worry about him.

When I reached the bathroom, I locked the door. Then I opened the package, my hands surprisingly steady, and as I waited for the result of the test, I realized I didn’t need it. It would only confirm what I already knew was true.

Three minutes later, I had that confirmation.