I haven't heard from him since.
And then there was, Jared: another friend turned sex sidekick turned boyfriend turned mutist. The difference with Jared, though, was that we saw each other practically every day, and practically every day we pretended we'd never even met.
He served me a Chai latte. I paid him. I left.
Not awkward at all.
So, yeah, after Alistair and Jared, I vowed never to sleep with and date any of my friends ever again, which was why when Chris and I screwed up and screwed each other, I nipped that shit in the bud. It was the best thing I'd ever done, because neither of us had ever looked back.
Friends should just not have sex.
The message ping of Elliot's response once again startled me, and I nearly dropped my phone in the water.
Elliot: I'm putting it all down to nerves from not having seen you in so long.
A smile played at the corners of my mouth. I understood where he was coming from because seeing him for the first time in seventeen years had shocked me, too. That said, my shock hadn't resulted in me announcing a bogus engagement.
Danielle: I was nervous about seeing you as well.
* * *
Elliot: You're still every bit the chocolate-haired, apple-cheeked Danielle I spent my childhood with.
His description of my hair and face jogged a memory of when we were younger, when we were sitting on the branches of a pine tree together and eating his birthday cake. He'd told me my hair reminded him of the chocolate curls covering the icing, and I'd thought it was one of the sweetest things anybody had ever said to me.
I still do.
Heat flushed through my body, and not because of the temperature of the water.
Danielle: And you're still the tall, dark and handsome, giant elf who lived next door.
I hit send and instantly regretted it, never before having told him I thought he was handsome. Shit!
Before I could type a friendly fob-off message, such as, "Gotta go. It's late. Talk soon. Bye", he replied.
Elliot: Does Chris know you think I'm handsome?
No, and he wouldn't care, either. In fact, he'd probably laugh and childishly chant for us to get it on.
Not knowing how to respond, I screwed my nose up and hovered my finger over the keypad. He can't know I'm not dating Chris. He has to believe it's the real deal so he can get this ridiculous engagement scenario out of his head.
Danielle: No. And that's a good thing. He's incredibly jealous.
* * *
Elliot: He didn't seem jealous tonight.
* * *
Danielle: That's because you weren't a threat.
* * *
Elliot: Why wasn't I a threat?
Sucking in a deep breath, my stomach churned at the lie I was about to type. I didn't want to type it. It was bound to bruise his ego and make him think less of me, and, deep down, I didn't want Elliot thinking less of me or thinking I'd grown into a heartless bitch. But, I had to thwart his obnoxious advances - nothing good had come from them … apart from a very delicious kiss.
Danielle: Because he knows you're not my type.
Once again, I hit send and waited, my stomach churning, my throat dry, my heart pounding like a ticking clock within my chest, each beat louder and louder until the beep of my phone broke the count. What I'd said was uncalled for and blunt. Even worse was that it was untrue. Elliot was very much my type. He always had been.
Elliot: I guess some things never change then.
Staring down at his response, my bottom lip curved and trembled as a tear trailed down my cheek.
Yeah, maybe they don't.
Danielle hadn't changed. She was still trying to bullshit me just like she had when we were younger, except this time, I didn't know what her reasoning was. When we were kids, she'd never wanted to be my girlfriend because she'd wanted to be my friend more. I'd even tried convincing her otherwise, promising that she would always be my friend, no matter what. But she'd never listened. Forever stubborn. Once that girl got an idea in her head, there was no way of getting it out. Not even with a chisel. And trust me, I tried … sans the chisel.
She'd always insisted that I was her only 'true friend' one that didn't backstab or lie to her because, according to her, "that's what girls do - they trick you and tear you down." She'd explained that having girls as friends was a vicious cycle she just didn't want to be a part of, which was why she preferred hanging out with boys instead, except she didn't really hang out with anyone but me.
The part about her not trusting or wanting to be friends with girls wasn't what I'd always thought to be bullshit, because I'd beared witness to how often she would be ridiculed at their expense: "Shortcake. Tomboy. Caterpillar face." So yeah, I'd believed her when she'd said I was her only true friend. I just hadn't believed her when she'd said she didn't want to date me. Just like I don't believe her now when she says I'm not her type.