"No, Ares is just a good friend."
"He's a pig. Why would you want to be friends with him?"
Audrey puts down her fork, and tilts her head as she looks at Rose. "Have you met him?"
"Yeah. I went to a race, and he caught me looking at his car."
"His car?"
"I kind of have an obsession with cars, and engines, and stuff," she says with a shrug. "Of course, that was unfathomable to Ares. He thought I was a pit bunny, just there for a good time to roll around the floor of the garage."
"Are you fucking kidding me? Did he hurt you, Rose?" Luke asks, and from the look on his face, I think Ares had better watch his back. Team Luke seems like a pretty awesome place to be at the moment.
"No, I am not kidding. Chicks do that. You know that from playing hockey, plus all the moms who go full-on Cougar when they see you at the school. I don't begrudge those women their fun-they know what they're getting, and if that's what they want, I say go for it-but I'm not sleeping with some oversexed driver who thinks he's God's gift. And no, he didn't hurt me. I kneed him in the balls and walked away while he cried out for help."
Maggie and Audrey share a look, and I can't tell what it means. No one else seems to notice, so I let it go. Whatever they have going on is something I'll probably never know about. I've already accepted that I'll never be privy to all the super spy secrets, and vowed to not obsess over it, because that would just make me crazy, and I still wouldn't be told anything I'm not supposed to know anyway.
"Who's ready for some cake?" Maggie asks, standing up, and effectively changing the subject.
The other Griffin women go inside with her. When they return, the rest of the Society girls and their guys, along with their mentors and a reluctant looking Kendrick, are with them. They have a big cake with baby stuff all over it, and I can't help but smile. Audrey is so loved by everyone, me included, and I know that them doing this for her will mean a lot to her. When she turns her face to sob into my shirt, I pull her close, and chuckle into her hair.
"Aud?" Reina asks, her eyes going wide.
"It's the hormones. I think," I tell her.
"Oh okay. Well, we just wanted to say how happy we are for you-both of you. We'll have a shower for you later, but we wanted to celebrate with you now, too."
"Thank you," Audrey says, turning to smile at all of them. "And Kenny, you came to celebrate with us, too. That's awesome."
"Yes, well I was coerced."
"Just admit it, Doc. You were hoping to see me naked again," I say, making everyone but him laugh.
"You," he sputters. "I thought you would be normal. But no, I guess it's too much to expect for any of you to act appropriately."
"Tell us more about Blake being naked," Candi says, her eyes sparkling as Owen glares at me.
"Audrey and I were celebrating the baby in our own way, but Kendrick interrupted us."
"You were in my hospital wing. The door was not locked, and you … this is just … dear God why did I not stay in emergency medicine?"
"Because I pay you much better than you'd ever make there, and you get to make a difference in many lives with the public work we do. Live sex shows are just a bonus," Reina tells him with a straight face.
"Mrs. Corrigan," Kendrick says, turning to Jane Corrigan, who is trying to hide her smile behind her cocktail, "is there no chance of you returning to the helm?"
"No, Kendrick, and even if I had to for some reason, you would be seeing and doing the same things. If you're really unhappy, you are free to leave. No one is forced to stay with us."
"I do not wish to leave. I just wish to see less sexual encounters in my patient rooms."
"We'll try to behave," Ellie tells him.
"You two are the worst! You get hurt the most often, and misbehave even more."
"We know. I'll keep it in my pants until we're out of the hospital wing. Promise," Aiden tells him.
"Thank you."
"Can I have my cake now? It looks yummy. You got it from Drago Sisters, right?" Audrey asks.
"Like we would go somewhere else. And yes, let's eat," Maggie tells her.
I lean over to Audrey, and whisper in her ear, because I can't pass up the chance to tease her. "Did you just really say ‘yummy?'"
"I did. Now shut up and feed me some cake before I eat your piece, too."
"Yes, boss."
"Not boss. Partner. We're partners."
"That we are."
Chapter 24
Audrey
It's opening night for the play, which means it's also the last night we have together before Blake leaves on his press tour. He was supposed to have a week off in between, but they needed him early, and he has to go. The past several weeks have been like a dream, one where I get to wake up with the man I love, and go to bed with him again every night. But they've also been a little rough.
I've tried really hard to get past our past, but I know he feels me holding back. In fact, we had a huge fight about it last night. I close my eyes and think about the things he said to me.
"I love you so much, Audrey. I can't keep going like this, though. I don't know what more I can do to prove that I've changed. That I'm not going to let you down again. I want to move forward with you. I'm not expecting you to forget our past, but you have to get past it if we're going to have a future. Can you do that?"
I couldn't answer him, and so he left. He walked out and went to sleep in Aiden's old place. I wasn't even sure he'd want me to go tonight, but then he texted me this morning, telling me he loved me and would spend the rest of his life proving that to me. I feel like a royal bitch, and I really need to talk to someone, but I'm too embarrassed to tell anyone, focusing instead on getting ready for tonight.
I've just started to show, but only when I wear tight clothes, so Stella brought over some looser dresses, and I'm trying to decide on which on to go with. I didn't want a big group dress-up party tonight, because between the fight and Blake leaving, I'm feeling moody and hormonal, so I told everyone to stay away. It'll be hard to put on a brave face later, so I just need some time to cry a little by myself right now.
My doorbell rings, and I go down in my robe to answer it. I'm not really surprised to see Tegan standing there, already dressed and ready to go. "It took you long enough," I tell her as I open the door to let her in.
"I wanted to see how you reacted to Caleb's talk before I came and talked to you myself. I thought I might not have to."
"But now you think you do."
"Yes."
"Okay. You can help me decide on a dress while we talk," I tell her, leading her up the stairs.
"Stella says it has to be the white sheath with the black sheer embellished overlay that looks kind of like a storm is happening."
"How dangerous would it be if I choose a different one?"
"You know she's right."
"Of course she's right. I was already leaning towards that one. It's just frustrating that she knows my body better than I do."
"It's all the anatomy classes she took in fashion school."
"Probably, but it's still freaky."
"It is," she agrees.
I slip on the dress, and then sit in front of my vanity to do my hair and makeup. "Go ahead and say what you need to."
"You know my story, and what I went through. I mean, hell, since the videos of me at the carnival went viral, pretty much the whole world knows."
"True. But it's a good story for the young women of the world to hear."
"It is. I don't love that I lived it, because it was fucking hard, but once I realized that I could help others with my story, I was able to look past the pain, and find the good in my life right now."
"I'm trying to get over my past."
"But you haven't yet. I see it in your eyes when you look at Blake. You're holding back part of yourself from him."
It's time for me to finally admit it to someone, and she's the best person for the job. "There's this little voice that just keeps telling me I'm not good enough, and that I'm going to be waiting for him again while he's off laughing at me. I know it's not logical, but it's there. And I'm scared."
"That man hangs on your every word, and looks at you like you're a present he's waited his whole life to unwrap. He's not going to leave you again, and I know he'll do his damnedest to not ever let you down. He will let you down sometimes, and you'll do the same to him. It's life-no one behaves the way we want them to, all of the time. You've got to let go of the past, and give yourself to the present, and the future, if there's ever going to be a chance for the two of you."
"I know. I want to, and he wants me to. We fought about it last night, and he slept downstairs. I just don't know how to do it. How to forget."