Playing God(148)

Her whole hand was shaking by the time she sank the last injection into her mother's neck.

Theia dropped the injector back into the box and buried her face in her hands.

I'm sorry, she thought to her mother's consciousness on its journey to the Ancestors. I didn't know what else to do. I didn't mean to kill you, or Res. I miss you, that's all. I know you're not really here anymore, but I want you to be. I don't want to be alone, I don't. Forgive me.

She might have dozed off for a little while, she wasn't sure. All she knew was that she felt a familiar touch on the back of her head.

“My Daughter,” said her mother softly. “My brave Daughter.”

Theia jerked her head up. Mother stood in front of her, a little stooped, and her ears waved aimlessly, but her eyes were focused on Theia.

“Mother!” Theia leapt into her arms. She would have climbed into her pouch if she could, but as it was she wrapped her arms around her mother and hugged her hard.

“Easy, easy, now, my Daughter,” chided Mother. “I am fragile these days.”

Theia pulled back just a little. Tears stung her eyes. “Are you good, Mother?”

“A little, not very, and I don't know for how long.” Her ears waved, as wild and restless as her wandering had been. “Everything comes at me like waves. It's distant, then it's right smack in front of me, and it's distant again.” She swayed on her feet, and Theia, her heart in her mouth, steadied her.

“I don't know how long I have, Daughter. You have to get me to the Home of Queens. Now, Theia. Do you understand?” Mother clutched at her, her eyes widening with fear or urgency, or both. “Bring the letter, do you understand? Bring the letter.”

“Yes, Mother.” Theia snatched her wallet off the table where she'd left it and stuffed the letter inside. “Come with me.” Theia linked her arm through her mother's, trying not to feel how erratically her skin twitched. Together, they slipped out the back door.

It was midafternoon. All the good cousins were inside with Ciean and her swelling womb, taking their lessons and digesting whatever Aunt Armetrethe poured into them.

The family's battered frame car was in the drive. Aunt Armetrethe commandeered Council transportation these days. Theia could drive, after a fashion. Ciean and the cousins had been teaching her and Res. The steering on the old car was stiff and cantankerous, but she could keep it mostly on the road. She gripped the wheel, worked the levers, and bared her teeth to the wind and rain. Mother sat next to her, shivering and clutching at her arm and shoulder occasionally.

“I'm here!” she'd shout every now and then. “I'm still here.”

“We're both here,” Theia answered.

“Yes,” said Mother, and Theia could swear she heard real satisfaction in her voice. “We're both here.”

The arms-sisters had barricaded the streets leading to the Home of Queens. They knew Theia, and apparently no contravening orders had been handed down, so they raised the barricades and let them drive through.

They made it all the way to the gates of the Home of Queens, where a prime-sister waved them to a stop.

“We need to get through,” said Theia to the prime-sister, who'd had both her ears ripped ragged in some combat long ago. Theia wracked her brains for the prime's name.

“Theiareth Shin t'Theria, right?” The prime-sister squinted at her. “I'm sorry, Noblest Sister, but your aunt Armetrethe's been specific. You're not permitted entry to the Home.”

“What about me?” said Mother.

The Prime-Sister turned her head slowly, as if noticing Mother for the first time.

“Praeis Shin?” she said, wonderingly. “I thought… I'd heard…”

Mother bared her teeth. “There are more rumors in the service man there are guns,” she said, a little too fast, a little too tight. “I am still a representative of the Queens-of-All and one of the Noblest Sisters t'Theria. You will let my daughter and me through immediately. Immediately.”

The prime-sister hesitated. Theia tapped her foot to get the Ancestors’ attention.

“Immediately,” repeated Mother, her ears waving agitatedly.

“Yes, Noblest Sister.” The prime-sister stood back and gestured for the gate to be opened.

“Thank you,” breathed Theia to the Ancestors as she drove through.

She parked the car right in the middle of the cobbled yard. Her mother climbed out, stumbling a little on the stones. Theia grabbed her arm. “Are you good?”

Mother focused on her, a little too slowly. “No. Get me in to the Queens, Daughter. Get me in. There's not much longer.”

Theia took her arm and pulled her close. “Then here we go, Mother.”