“So you were telling me how this was partially my fault.”
She sighed. “It doesn’t matter.”
“It matters to me.”
Keira shook her head again, retreating back within herself. “No, I really don’t want to complain. I brought it all on myself, really.”
“I doubt that’s true, but I have an idea,” I said. “How about we talk about some other things for a while, and maybe then you’ll feel comfortable enough to tell me? And I’ll start by telling you the dumbest thing I ever did. How does that sound?”
I saw a hint of a smile turn her lips up. “I guess we could try that.”
“Okay, good. But you have to promise you won’t go to the tabloids about this particular scandal. Let’s just say I’d be very embarrassed if the story ever went public.”
“So I should turn off the recording device in my pocket, and all the secret cameras I’ve got on you right now?”
I smiled, glad to see she was already feeling comfortable enough to at least make silly jokes, just like she had on the first night we met. “Very funny. Anyway, when I was about nine, I developed a crush on one of the maids. This was when we were staying at Wellington Castle for a while.”
Keira’s eyes sparkled with humor. “Why did I know this would be about a woman?”
“Shh. I’m not finished,” I said with another grin. “She was one of the live-in staff members, and one day I followed her around and figured out which room was hers.”
“Oh no…”
“And I remembered seeing some movie where the main male character stole his crush’s underwear. I can’t remember why, but I thought ‘oh yes, that seems like a great idea,’ and I managed to get into her room—can’t even remember how—and I stole a rather slinky silk camisole and a pair of knickers from her dresser.”
“Well, that’s creepy, but not that bad,” Keira said. “You were only nine.”
“That’s not the end of the story, regrettably.”
“Oh, god…well, go on, then,” she said, settling back on the sofa and looking far more relaxed now. “I feel like I need a box of popcorn while I listen to this saga.”
“Okay, so after I stole the things, I decided that the only thing to do with my stolen goods was to hide them somewhere on the grounds so no one would find it in my room. So I ran out onto the grounds and headed beyond the stables and over to the grove of trees that’s nearby. I don’t know why, I suppose I was going to hide them in a hole in a tree or something. But it suddenly started bucketing down, as it tends to do in England, and I thought, ‘I don’t want her lovely silk cami and knickers to get all wet and ruined. What was I thinking, bringing them out here?’ So I stripped down and put them on underneath my clothes to protect them from the rain. She was a very small woman, probably about four foot ten and maybe ninety pounds, so they actually weren’t too loose on me despite my age.”
Keira nodded. “Uh-huh.”
“I figured I’d return to the castle and find somewhere else to stash them. But it was really pissing down with rain now, and by the time I got inside, my mother and some of the staff were deeply concerned that I might catch pneumonia or something, so they insisted on immediately taking off my clothes so I could dry off and get into dry, warmer clothes.”
“Oh no...”
“Of course I pitched a fit, saying they couldn’t undress me, but my mother insisted, and as soon as my clothes came off…there it was. A pink silk camisole under my clothes, with a matching thong worn over my boxers. And the maid who it belonged to? She was right there. She saw everything.”
She clapped a hand to her mouth. “No…really?”
I nodded, still grinning. “Pretty stupid of me, huh?”
“Yeah, although knowing you, I was actually expecting something much worse.”
“You flatter me too much,” I said, playfully jostling her. “Anyway, enough about me. The other day, you mentioned that this is a gap year for you? Tell me more about that.”
She nodded. “I wanted to see some of the art in Europe, and I figured this is a good way of doing it. There really are a lot of amazing museums here.”
“Yes, there are,” I said with a nod. “So how’d you settle on applying for this specific job?”
“Cleaning doesn’t exactly take too much experience, so I figured it’s an easy enough job to do, and the palace maids are paid better than any other cleaning jobs in the country.”
“Indeed. Although to be fair, it’s not that easy. I probably wouldn’t have the first clue how to turn on a vacuum cleaner,” I said with a self-deprecating smile. “Unlike some people here, who know very well how to use one early in the morning when I’m hungover as hell...”