I couldn’t possible agree more.
Mom says something I don’t catch to the shop woman, and the two of them leave the back room out through a side door. I open the curtain wider before I can stop myself, drinking in the pure beauty of this woman standing before me.
Natalie looks up as she steps from the pedestal, and suddenly sees me in the mirror. She gasps, whirling with a hand on her chest and her cheeks flushing bright red.
“You’re not supposed to see me,” she says quietly, blushing and smiling shyly.
“I thought that was before the wedding,” I say with a grin, stepping into the room and letting my eyes roam over her.
“Same thing,” she says primly, biting her lip.
I shake my head. “Nat, you look-”
“Goofy, right?” She makes a face.
“Incredible,” I say, feeling my heart hammering in my chest, somehow unable to tear my eyes away from her. “You look fucking incredible.”
Her cheeks go dark as she drops her eyes to the floor. “Thank you.”
“Honestly, it looks amazing on you.”
She looks up with a little grin on her face “Well, you’re paying for it.”
I laugh.
“Seriously though, you shouldn’t see me.”
“You know.” I lock eyes with her, stepping closer. “You keep saying that.” I reach out without saying another word and trail my hand over her silk-draped hip and up her side before trailing my fingers back down her bare arm.
“Your mother is right outside,” she whispers, staring at me with hooded eyes.
I step closer, my lips inches from hers as I lock eyes with her. And all the pent up passion, all the things I’ve wanted to say to her, and do to her for the last few says burning right into her.
Her face says the same damn thing.
“I think you should be done shopping for the day.”
She nods quickly. “I think so too.”
I duck back out through the curtain before my mom and the shopkeeper come back with some new shoes or something for Natalie to try on. I turn back and glance through the slit in the curtain once more to see her standing there in white.
And something inside of me breaks.
It’s the push and the pull, the wanting her, but not wanting to get close because I know it’ll be harder when this is all over. Because this does have an expiration date, and for the first time, I realize just how much that sucks.
38
Austin
I’m thinking about it the whole way home with her, after making up some excuse to my mom about a last minute business meeting I have with Derek.
At some point, I realize Natalie is looking at me from the passenger seat.
“What?” I glance at her.
“You’ve got this look on your face.”
I shrug. “Just thinking about practice this week.”
I can’t tell her. I mean what, tell her that I’ve having second thoughts about the “fake” part of our relationship? That she’s making me better, and making me feel things I’ve never felt before?
Yeah, right. I can’t tell her that. I have to remember what this is - an arrangement, a business transaction
It can’t be more than that, because I can’t let it be more than that. We can’t keep mixing business and pleasure. God, I want her, but I have to put a stop to this. I can’t keep touching her, and tasting her, and letting her in deep like this.
That part has to end.
The car stops in the driveway, and I follow Natalie into the house, my mind a blur.
We’ll pose for pictures, we’ll do the media thing for the cameras and the interviews. Derek will be happy, my mom will be happy, and the goddamn endorsement people will be happy.
I steel myself as I turn to close the front door and hang my keys next to it. We’ll do the dog and pony show, we’ll make everyone happy, and then we’ll walk away from this.
I’m putting a stop to this right-
“Austin?”
I turn, and I instantly forget every single morose, dark thought running though my head.
She’s naked - a hungry look on her face and her sundress pooled at her feet along with her panties.
“I believe I cut my shopping trip early?”
I groan, even as the grin spreads across my face and as my cock rapidly grows inside my pants.
Fuck.
And right then, I know I’m wrong. Right then, I know every single thing I just decided in my head is utter bullshit.
I’m not putting a stop to anything right now. I’m not walking away from this - hell, I wouldn’t even know how.
She gasps when I snatch her up into my arms, her legs wrapping around my waist as I grab her ass and kiss her like a man possessed. There’s no floor, or couch, or kitchen this time.
This time, I want her in my bed, and I want to take my damn time.