I nodded, and his lips crashed against mine. There was a hunger, a desperation in his touch. I tried to push the thought of losing him out of my mind. My hands slid up his chest and over his shoulders. His fingers tightened in my hair as his other hand slid over my hip and held my body against his.
“I don’t know what I’ll do without you,” he mumbled breathlessly against my lips as his hand slid up my side, dragging my tank top up. His fingers glided over my stomach and along the waistband of my jeans. His gaze dropped between us before his eyes searched mine. I pulled my lip between my teeth as I nodded, and his lips were on mine again.
We sunk to the grass, and Brock pulled his shirt over his head and placed it on the ground before lowering me onto it, his body on top of mine. The moonlight filtered through the trees, and as the wind blew, it sent spots of light dancing over us. I slid my hands over his back as his hands went under my shirt and his palm moved over my breast. His lips traveled to my neck as he trailed kisses down to my collarbone.
He pulled back, his eyes on mine, and I smiled. “You sure about this, Bird?” he asked.
“You’re the only thing I’m sure about.”
He grabbed my shirt and pulled it over my head, tossing it beside us as he pressed his chest against mine. I wasn’t sure if it was his heart or mine that was hammering between us. His fingers slid between our bodies as he undid the button and zipper of my jeans. I did the same, undoing his pants with shaky fingers as we struggled to get closer to each other. I was terrified knowing what was about to happen, but I wanted it as much as he did.
He sat back on his knees as he tugged my jeans and panties down my hips. My arms covered my chest; I felt embarrassed about being so exposed to him. He smiled as he dragged my jeans down my legs then laid them on the grass beside us. His fingers looped around my wrists as he slowly pulled my arms away. “You’re so beautiful,” he said with sigh.
“Brock? Do you…do you have something?”
He laughed as he pulled his wallet from his back pocket and grabbed a condom that was tucked inside. He put it between his teeth the tear it open. “This is going to hurt, Bird. But I promise I’ll take it slow.”
I nodded as he leaned his body over mine. Propped up on his forearm, he slid his jeans over his hips and unrolled the condom over his length. He positioned himself at my entrance, and his lips found mine. He kissed me slowly, taking his time until my body relaxed beneath him. He rocked forward, and I wrapped my arms around his back, holding his chest against mine. I tensed, and he pulled back, his kisses slowing as we repeated the process. This time he pushed in farther, slipping the tip inside me then stopping, letting me get used to the feeling.
“Are you OK?” he asked, his voice strained, as if it were painful for him to hold back.
“Yes,” I panted, and he rocked his hips, sliding farther inside me. I groaned as my body stretched and adjusted to accommodate him.
“This’ll hurt, but only for a few minutes, OK?”
I nodded as his lips found mine again, pressing impossibly hard. He pushed against me, and I tried to cry out, but his kisses swallowed my words. His hips stilled, giving me time to get used to him as his lips left mine, peppering kisses over my eyelids and the tip of my nose. “I love you, Lie. I love you so much.”
My eyes slowly opened as the pad of his thumb ran over my eyebrow. “I love you too.” I didn’t need to think about it as the words fell from my lips.
Between hungry kisses, we mumbled the words over and over as we made love under the moonlight. Flowing water drowned out heavy breaths, and rustling leaves masked the sounds of secret pleasures.
We lay in each other’s arms for an hour afterward as I confessed what my life had been like over the past few weeks. His fingertips trailed up and down my arm, and occasionally he pressed his lips to my temple and reassured me that everything would be OK.
I wanted to believe him, but knowing he’d be leaving in a few days, I was stuck to face this on my own, and I didn’t know if I’d be strong enough.
“I was ready to give up today,” I told him, “before you called. I can’t deal with it anymore. I can’t face three more months of school.”
Brock’s arm stiffened as he pulled me to his side. I placed my leg over his waist and my head on his chest, wishing tonight would never end.
“I promised you I’d take care of you. I mean what I say.” I looked up at him, and his eyes met mine. “You believe me, Bird?”
I nodded and lowered my head. There was nothing Brock could do to make this better. “I should get home. My mom will flip if she finds out I left.”