She whacked his shoulder. “Rocket surgery? Seriously?” She rolled her eyes at his bad joke.
“Point being, this is the twenty-first century. We already know things work okay here.” He patted the bed and waggled his brows for good measure, feeling his best, most lascivious grin cross over his lips. The blush on Alice’s cheeks spread to her ears. He wondered where else she was blushing. “That works fine.”
“Better than fine.”
“So we work on the rest while you’re not near me. Because when I have you in touching distance, I’m not going to want to think about our communication skills.”
“Why do you want this?” She glanced up from the bedspread to meet his gaze. “Why do you want me?”
“Because I’d be an idiot not to want you.”
“That’s not an answer, Alex.”
“You want, like, a list or something?”
“Yes. I want a list. Give me a list.”
“I want to be with you because I’ve never met anyone like you in my life. You’re stubborn and you’re smart and you’re funny—even though I don’t think you intend to be sometimes. Being around you makes me so happy I think I might actually lose IQ points. Like, if stupid happy was a thing, you do that to me. Why in God’s name would I want someone else when I’ve already found what I want?”
Her eyes were wet with tears, and he thought he must have said the wrong thing. The mental recorder in his brain rewound the sentiments, trying to pinpoint which one might have upset her.
“But my life is so messy,” she insisted.
“And?”
“You could meet anyone else. Someone younger, someone…prettier.”
“There is no one on earth prettier than you, you stupid woman.”
“Fine.” She brushed the compliment off like lint, but he saw the smile. “But you could find someone with less baggage.”
“Maybe I could. But she wouldn’t be you.”
She swatted him again, and this time he caught her hand, pressing her fingertips against his lips.
“She wouldn’t be you,” he repeated.
“God, Alex.” She tried to wrench her hand free but didn’t put a lot of effort into the struggle. “Don’t you dare say this stuff to me if it’s just to get me in bed.”
“I’ve already gotten you into bed. I have you in bed right now.”
“You know what I mean.”
“I’m not Matt Hernandez.” He was still holding her hand, but he’d stopped tugging at her playfully. Even to his own ears the tone of his voice had gone cold and serious.
“I know.”
“Do you?” Alex stared at her, trying to keep her attention, but her gaze kept darting away. “Tell me you know I’m not him.”
“You’re not him. But I’m worried you’ll become him. He said a lot of sweet things in the beginning too.”
“If I just wanted to get into your pants, I wouldn’t be here still. You’re an amazing lover, but I’m not going to lie about feelings I don’t have only to get with you again. I’m not sixteen. I don’t need to tell a girl I love her to convince her to sleep with me.”
She went still, and he froze in the same moment. He hadn’t meant to let the L-bomb slip, not so soon. He wasn’t sure of what he felt for her, but he knew it was something he’d never experienced before. But any asshole knew you didn’t tell a girl you loved her until you thought she was ready to hear it.
And Alice was so not ready for him to say those words.
She didn’t ask him to repeat himself, and Alex didn’t try. But in spite of his fears that the accidental slip would make her run for the hills, she had softened. The tension melted away from her, and much of the anxiety she’d come into the room with had vanished.
“We can try it under one condition,” she said finally.
He let out a breath he hadn’t known he was holding. “What’s that?”
“We can’t tell anyone.”
For a second the request confused him. Why on earth would she want to keep it a secret? Weren’t secrets part of the problem, part of what upset her so much about Matt?
She must have read the confusion on his face because she gave his hand a comforting squeeze. “It’s not a shame thing, I swear. But you are famous, and I’m not ready to subject my life to that kind of outside scrutiny. I still think I introduced you to Olivia too soon, and she’s one person. I’m not ready to let the whole world in on this until we’re sure it’s something. And there’s my job. I can’t keep being an umpire if we decide to make a real go of things. Can you say conflict of interest?”