People of the Weeping Eye(172)

“Yellow has the ball again,” Two Petals noted as it was flung northward. As the mass of players dissolved to sprint after the ball, two men hobbled toward the sidelines. One held his arm; the other’s face streamed blood from a broken nose. Only after that portion of the field was left empty could she see the limp body of a third. Two of the Cattail Town players hesitated, then went back and carried their limp comrade to the sidelines, where the crowd took the burden and bore him to the rear.

“They take their play seriously,” Old White noted from where he stood beside the Kala Hi’ki. “They hope Power will favor them for their dedication.”

“And it is better that the disagreement over the woman is settled here, under the watchful eyes of Power,” the Kala Hi’ki added. “They hope Mother Sun and the Spirits will grant favor to the side with the greatest merit. Here everyone can see justice done. The towns can take out their grievances without resorting to bloodshed.”

Two Petals smiled slightly as a dazed man was left behind the scrimmage, blood dripping from his mouth. She watched as he rolled onto his knees and wrenched his dislocated jaw back in place. When he stood, he almost toppled, weaving his way on wobbling legs to the side, where his relatives crowded around him, patting him on the back, thumping his shoulders, and propelling his wobbly body back onto the field.

Cattail Town’s white-clad players broke the ball free, passing it neatly from player to player, each catching the ball in their hoops and finally casting it through the far goal.

She waited for the roar of the crowd to vanish, then said, “That was Cattail Town’s goal.”

The Kala Hi’ki asked, “How are my eyes faring? Are you still a rock?”

“I am still a rock.” She watched the teams take their places as the old man walked out between the ranks, another boy bringing the ball to the elder.

“Do you begin to understand the lesson?” the Kala Hi’ki asked. “Can you see the way of it? How you can just let the world pass? For you, Contrary, none of this is real. The struggle you face is to convince yourself of it. All of your life you have been taught that you must be part of the world around you. You have been directed since you were little to be one of the players. People have encouraged you to interact with them, talk, and participate. Deep inside you is the need to have people respond, to see approval in their eyes. As Power grew inside you, you tried harder and harder to fit in, to be one of them. In the end, you were only fighting against yourself and the gift Power filled you with.”

“But I—”

“There is no but!” the Kala Hi’ki insisted sternly. “Surrender yourself. Give up Two Petals. She is no more. The woman you once were, the one you fought so desperately to keep, is faded like a shadow under the clouds. Only the Contrary remains. You are separate. Special. Power has placed you apart. As it has me. Only when you give up trying to be as you once were—forget trying to be like everyone else—will you accept Power, and allow the world to wash around you.”

She nodded, swallowing hard. In that moment, she began to lose her focus. She could feel the tremble begin in her jaw.

“You are a rock,” the Kala Hi’ki told her firmly. “Close your eyes. Concentrate on being impervious. There, that’s it. Feel the world flow past like the river. Allow the noise of the crowd to pass around you. It is illusion. Not of your world, but a distraction to keep you from yourself. Ignore it. Sound is not real. You only imagine it.” He paused, letting her concentrate. “Search for yourself inside. Find your souls. They are real. You are real. You are the rock. The world flows around you.”

She felt herself still; the trembling fear receded.

“Let Two Petals go,” he said softly. “You are the Contrary. You are only the Contrary. Not of this world, but separate.”

She nodded, her breathing settling. I am calm. I am stone.

She opened her eyes and just stood, letting the sights and sounds flow past. It is all illusion.

“Who has the ball?” the Kala Hi’ki asked.

“Yellow again.” She watched, forcing herself to be detached. In that state she let herself speak. She simply let the words flow through her. For the first time since her mother’s death, she experienced peace.

“Yes,” one of the voices in her head said. “This is the way it is supposed to be.”

I am Contrary. I exist outside the world. The rest is illusion.

In the end it didn’t matter that Cattail Town won. It simply was.





Thirty-three

Morning cast a gray luminescence into the eastern sky. Rainbow City was already coming awake—not that it had slept with Dances, feasting, and celebration through most of the night. Frost had settled on thatch roofs and coated the brown leaves of grass where they had been beaten flat. It left a hoar on the posts and ramadas, and turned treacherous the wooden stairways that climbed the mounds.