Paradise Disguised(22)

She walked into the suite and headed over to the desk. She ignored their  private view of the creek that could be seen perfectly from the lake  sized, four-poster bed that sat in the middle of the room. She'd tackle  the bed issue later. The room was spacious and open, but she felt as if  the walls were closing in on her with Dylan standing mere feet away.

"I need to make some business calls before all the stores close for the  night," Anna said, thinking of the first excuse that came to mind so she  could avoid being alone with him a little longer.

"Fine," Dylan said, his voice flat. "I'm going to head down to the bar for a drink. Our reservation is at seven thirty."

He closed the door behind him with a controlled effort Anna had to  admire. He was angry with her, but she should be the one who was angry.

She walked out onto the balcony, her phone calls forgotten, and lost  herself in thought. They'd have to come to an understanding before the  night was over. Her heart was too vulnerable to make love to him again  without letting him know her feelings.

She looked over her shoulder at the bed that beckoned lovers by the  sight of it. Things were bound to get more difficult as the night went  on.



Dylan nursed his Scotch on the rocks as he waited for Anna to walk into  the bar. What had he been thinking, leaving himself wide open for  rejection, again.

He heard the conversation in the bar dim and knew Anna had walked into  the room. He had the same reaction every time he saw her. She was  beautiful, but she was sweet and kind and funny. The complete package.  She made him laugh and she made him want with an intensity that  frightened him at times.

He turned in his seat and watched her make her way towards him, turning  every male eye in her direction. Her eyes were locked to his, and she  never noticed the other men's stares.

"Are you ready for dinner?" she asked.

"I've been looking forward to it all day," he said, matching her strained smile with one of his own.

He put his hand in the small of her back and led her to the dining area,  scowling in the direction of a few men whose gazes lingered a little  too long.

"How about some champagne?" Dylan asked as if they were celebrating. The  steward took the order and scurried off to procure their best bottle.

"So," Dylan said, finally getting the eye contact he'd been waiting for. "How long are you going to pretend I didn't say it?"

The color slowly drained from Anna's face. "I don't know what you mean,"  she said, busying herself by straightening the silverware in front of  her.

"You know exactly what I mean. I want to know why you won't acknowledge it and why you're treating me like a stranger."

"I just don't think it's significant."

"You don't think me telling you I love you is significant?" Dylan asked.  People were beginning to turn and stare, the volume of his voice a  little louder than necessary.

"Ssh. . ." Anna said, mortified. "I don't think it's significant because  I'm sure it's a term you use rather loosely with all of the women you  sleep with."

Now it was Dylan's color that drained, leaving his pallor ashen with  anger. "I noticed that you didn't come to me a virgin. Why do you get to  throw my past in my face? What if I told you the women from my past are  meaningless because the only woman I want from now on is you? Do you  think I'm so incapable of change?"                       
       
           



       

Anna kept silent at his outburst. She found it hard to believe that he'd  only want her from now on, but he was right about throwing his past in  his face. "I apologize for what I said."

"You're sorry for saying it to my face. That doesn't mean you're not  still thinking it. That word has never left my mouth, not to any other  woman I've ever been with, not even to my ex-wife. It's a word that  scares the shit out of me every time I hear it, but you think it's  insignificant?"

Anna was shocked by Dylan's confession. She had no idea that he'd been  serious in his declaration, and she was about to tell him so when he  continued talking.

"I got married the first time because my ex-wife told me she was  pregnant. That was the only reason. She lied about the baby and the  little spark of love I felt for that baby fizzled, and hate for her took  up that space in my soul. I was relieved when she walked out the door  and into her new lover's Lexus. I have never wanted a woman the way I  want you, and I sure as hell have never loved a woman the way I love  you. Though God knows why because the way you keep running away from me  would probably discourage a lesser man."

Their dinner was served without fanfare, the silence and tension at the  table so thick it could be cut with a knife. The waiters approached  their table like it was wired to explosives.

"Do you know what my reaction was when you told me today that you could  be pregnant?" Dylan asked. "I didn't realize it at the time because I  was shocked and scared, but my overall gut feeling was joy because what  better way to celebrate how much I love you than with a child."

Anna didn't know what to say, so she kept silent. Her own insecurities  were bringing out the only defense mechanism she had. Anger. It was  building inside her, and she knew it would come to a head before too  long. She picked at the buttery lobster that sat in front of her, unable  to enjoy its taste.

"You know what I think?" Dylan asked. "I think you're the one with the  issues here. I've faced my fears and laid my heart open for you, but  you're still hiding from yourself and your own fears. What are you so  afraid of?"

"What's there not to be afraid of?" she asked, uncaring they were in the  middle of a crowded restaurant and everyone was more interested in  their conversation than the food in front of them. They probably would  have been escorted out if Dylan hadn't been such a valued guest.

"What in the world makes you think I'd want to risk loving you, only to  lose you or watch you walk away in the end? I watched my father fall to  pieces after my mother died. He has never been the same, only half the  man he could be. Do you think I've never dreamed of being in love? That I  want to spend my life alone? What person would? But can I lay open my  heart and soul to you, and not be a broken and bitter person when you  decided to move on to your next conquest. I don't know if I can. And I  don't know if it's worth the risk."

"Sometimes you have to put everything on faith when it's something this  important. It's not just about love, but the other things that go with  it, like trust. When I say I love you, it's a promise, not a  convenience. These are your hang ups that you're going to have to  overcome. All I can do is love you."

Tears were streaming down Anna's cheeks. Confusion and hurt clouded her  mind and all she wanted was to hide in the shell she'd developed so many  years before. She brushed the tears away quickly as the check was  brought, and as soon as Dylan signed his name she stood and headed  towards the elevators.

Dylan followed at a slower pace behind her, but his eyes stayed glued to  her retreating form. She was distancing herself from him again, but he  wasn't going to let her get away with it this time.

The elevator ride was made in strained silence until the other passengers departed on their own floors.

"After you," Dylan said sarcastically as he opened the suite door for her.

Anna was just about to suggest that she sleep on the pull out couch in the sitting room when Dylan pulled her into his arms.

"Do you honestly think I'm going to leave you alone tonight and let you sulk?" Dylan asked, pushing her against the wall.

The door to the room slammed with such finality she was sure she'd never  be able to escape. The coolness of the wall at her back warred with the  heat of Dylan's body as it pressed forcefully against her.

"The last thing I'm going to do is give you a chance to run."

He brought his mouth to her own in a brutal kiss, a kiss to remind her  who she was with and who wanted her. She moaned into his mouth even  though her hands pushed him away. Every nerve in Anna's body hummed at  the feel of his lips touching her skin. But it was wrong. There was too  much at stake to make love like neither one of them had any sense left.                       
       
           



       

"Stop Dylan," she begged. "This isn't the way to do this. There are too many things to sort out."

"It's exactly the way to do this. I'm about to make you face your fears head on."

His lips roamed over her face, to the tender spot just below her jaw and  then to the pulse in her neck. He bit and suckled making her squirm  with pleasure. The want never dimmed when she was in his arms. All the  fear and doubt fled as he felt how her body molded to his perfectly.