She had to do something, wouldn’t forgive herself if his kind actions went unrewarded, if her wanting continued to be unappeased. She wasn’t sure where this determination, this courage or this desperate want had come from; she only knew she needed her husband. She needed to show him her loyalties were with him, her gratitude, her respect and desire. Her trust.
Were with him.
Dragging in a breath, she eased into a little number she’d never worn before, and then without thinking about it too much, quietly made her way to Landon’s bedroom.
The door stood partway open.
Her blood rushed so fast and heady in her veins it deafened her to the single word she spoke. “Landon.”
His head shot up at the sound of his name.
They stared in the quiet, sizing each other up. Beth in the threshold to his bedroom, Landon in bed with the covers to his waist, bare-chested and bronzed, already with a book in his hands.
Her eyes hurt, he was so compelling. Hard, bulging muscles stretched taut across his broad shoulders. She could see his biceps and the defined bands of his abs before they disappeared under the crisp white sheets.
Nervously, she wet her lips and forced herself to shut the door behind her. “Did you have a nice birthday?”
Clenching his jaw, Landon set his reading material aside. “Thank you, yes. Did you need anything?”
His clipped tone hinted that he wanted her to go, and for three long heartbeats, Beth considered it.
But she remained, struggling for the words. Love me.
Landon waited in silence, then let out a sigh. “Bethany, I’m hanging by a thread in more ways than you can imagine. If it’s nothing urgent, I suggest you go back to your room now.”
She did not know what to say. She’d been so insistent they keep a healthy distance, she now realized it would be a struggle to let him know that things…had changed. Everything. Had changed.
Breathing deeply, she brought her hand to the tie of her silk robe around her neck and fiddled with it. “I’d like to sleep here,” she said.
Frowning, Landon sat up, looking all gorgeous and puzzled and frustrated. “Is there something wrong with your bed?”
Don’t say no, please don’t send me away.
She’d never seduced a man, and the thought of being rejected made her cheeks heat up and her legs want to aim in another direction.
“It’s empty.”
With a low groan, he banged the back of his head against the headrest and closed his eyes. “Ah, Beth. How can I say this…” His Adam’s apple bobbed as he swallowed.
“Please don’t turn me away.”
A tremor spread through her as she waited, clenching the fabric from her nightgown in her hands.
If he denied her, she’d be devastated. Devastated.
Landon cursed under his breath and rolled to the other side of the bed. “Let me put on something, all right? And we can talk.”
Mute, Beth gaped at his gorgeous body as he eased out of bed, the ripple of muscle down his back as he plunged into his pajama bottoms. She gazed longingly at the covers, wanted to slip inside them, where Landon had been naked just now. His sheets would be warm, but she didn’t know if they were welcoming.
“What is it, exactly, that you want from me,” he growled as he strode over wearing loose cotton sleep pants, haphazardly tied.
She bit her lower lip in uncertainty. “Kiss me good-night?” That was as close as she got to asking him to take her, and apparently he didn’t believe his ears.
He stared in wonder, his expression revealing he still didn’t seem to know what to make of this visit.
“Not like a friend or a partner—like a husband,” she amended.
Understanding made his eyes flash.
He clenched his jaw so tight, a muscle jumped in the back, then he plunged both his hands into her hair and set his forehead on hers. “Do you want to be kissed by your husband?” he hissed.
“Yes.” She linked her hands behind his head and shuddered in expectation. “Please.”
He shut his eyes, let go a breath, and didn’t do anything for a long, long time.
Rolling his head against hers, he made a low, hungry sound. “Now tell me,” he said slowly, roughly, his voice ragged with desire, “you want your husband to make love to you, too.”
She didn’t answer for what felt like a year.
It was a dream, it had to be, but Beth felt too slim and warm to be a figment of his imagination. Landon had a desperate urge to get close to her. Closer. To feel her body around his, penetrate its depths, fill them with his essence.
He’d never gone without sex so long, but now it wasn’t sex he craved, it was mating with his wife, finding that union , that closeness. Searching her, finding her secrets, delving into the darkest parts of her, allowing her access to his.