I took the bracelet, one end in each hand and tried to attach it around his wrist. Only now my hands seemed shaky.
“You smell good,” he said softly.
I closed my eyes for a moment, my breath catching. “Just hold still.”
“I’m not the one moving.”
“Stop it.”
“What am I doing?”
“You’re making this hard for me.”
“Can I ask you a question?”
Why did he smell so amazing? That was the question I was going to ask when he was done with his.
“Yes.”
“Why do we fight so much?”
My mouth opened and shut in surprise. “We don’t. I mean … I just … our history isn’t so great.”
“I never understood why.”
“You gave me an awful nickname in the middle of a class I was already humiliated in.”
“I thought I was helping. You were getting pummeled by basketballs. I thought if I made a joke about it, it would help people laugh with you instead of at you.”
“It didn’t work.”
“I guess I can see that. So that’s it? I made up a nickname and got an enemy for life?”
“You do it to everyone,” I replied, looking right at him. “Humiliate them in the name of charity. Then you say rude comments and I’m never sure if you’re doing it because you are trying to be funny or if you don’t realize they’re rude, but they are. Just today you were mocking my hair.”
“What? I was not mocking your hair. You have great hair.”
That made me stutter for a moment. “Yeah, well, that’s, uh … Plus! And more importantly, you treated Isabel horribly.”
“I treated Isabel horribly? Me? What about how you treated her?”
I scowled. “Me? What did I do? She was my best friend. She’s still my best friend.”
“You were a huge flake. She’d call to set things up with you and you’d cancel last minute because you had to babysit and I had to watch her be disappointed all the time.”
I flinched at his depiction of me. “I have family obligations. She knows that.”
“And then you’d snap at me like I was the one leaving her alone in the middle of a restaurant or event.”
I glared at him. “No, you were the one leaving her alone even when you were standing right next to her. You were so checked out. You’d be on your phone or ignoring her in some other way.”
He grimaced. “I was in the middle of … things at that time.”
“Things? You never even told her what things, did you? You never told her anything about yourself. You don’t tell anything to anyone except—” I stopped myself, surprised I had gone that far. I’d almost given myself away.
He stared at me. “Except what?”
“Your girlfriend. I’m sure you tell Sasha everything.”
“Stop calling her that. She’s not my girlfriend.”
“Does she know that?”
His knee brushed against my hip and a jolt went through me. Why was I still standing this close? Probably because my hands were still holding both ends of the bracelet. I wasn’t sure if it was the anger coursing through me now or sheer determination, but I quickly clasped his bracelet and took a step back.
“Enjoy your apology man bracelet,” I snapped.
“I will love my man bracelet!”
There was something about the absurdity of that statement that made me want to laugh. I wasn’t sure if Cade wanted to laugh too but a light shone in his eyes. He stood and we were suddenly even closer than before. My eyes started to water as I stared at him, and I realized I hadn’t blinked. My desire to laugh was completely gone and other desires were taking over. Desires I knew he didn’t share. He’d basically just spelled out why he hated me. I was angry with myself for the feelings coursing through me. I turned and fled.
When I got to the minivan, I had to wait for close to five minutes before I felt steady enough to drive.
He was probably doing it to drive me crazy, to remind me what it stood for, but whatever the reason, Cade was wearing that bracelet, beads and all, to school the next morning. And even though winter had finally hit Arizona, bringing in lower temperatures than we’d had in months, he was wearing a three-quarter-length tee and no jacket, making the bracelet that much more visible.
I glared at him in the school parking lot.
He smiled at me, but not a real smile, a challenging one.
I decided to take him up on that challenge. “Nice bracelet,” I said, falling in step beside him instead of trying to avoid him like I normally did.
“Thank you,” he replied. “It was given to me by a girl who was deeply sorry for treating me unkindly.”