He shudders. "You're killing me. That brooding thing really works for you."
"Does it?" I tease.
"Yes. But light Jackson is sexy too." He tosses the small rock he still had between his fingers. "So we're friends? This is just weird."
"Yeah, I know." I chuckle. There's a lightness in my chest that hasn't been there in a long time. All my shit is still there, waiting beneath the façade of me letting go and just enjoying something. Within the next few minutes, I'll likely freeze up and start thinking about all the things I need to do and who I need to be. About visiting Mom and paying bills, but for now, I feel good.
"Since we're friends, does that mean we can girl talk? You never answered my question about if you've had a guy yet."
I roll my eyes at him but goddamn, he's endearing. "You sound like Frankie."
He crosses his arms. "Who's Frankie? I thought I was the only man in your life," he says playfully.
"My partner at work. He's why I knew to call you a power bottom, earlier. Not because he is one, but he's schooled me on all the lingo, so I know what I'm talking about when I go out." Though in a lot of ways, I still feel like an impostor. I would have felt like an imposter with Derek too-if I hadn't seen him with Randy.
"Oh, I'm jelly. I totally would have loved to teach you all of that. Are we still ignoring my question?" He shakes his bangs off his forehead.
"No, I haven't," I admit.
"What the fuck are you waiting for? Do you know how hot you are? All those power bottoms are going to be begging for your cock."
The truth is, I don't know what I'm waiting for. I just know that I am.
"Are you sure you're bi?"
"Are you sure you're gay?" I throw back at him.
He eyes my crotch. "Maybe we should have a quick go just to make sure."
I roll my eyes. "I'm trying to get used to the whole scene. You have to remember, I've been with Steph since I was a kid."
"All the more reason to get yourself some ass!" He laughs. "No offense to her. I'm just saying you've been with one person for a long time. You may have a grown-up kid, but you're not as old as you feel … or act like, even."
My eyes snap toward his. He hit the nail on the head without me having to tell him.
"You're letting all your responsibilities weigh you down. If I'm going to be your friend, we have to do something about that. Be the sexy daddy who likes to have a good time. He's fun."
I laugh again because the little shit is good at making me do that. "What am I going to do with you?"
"I've answered that question, numerous times." Derek pushes to his feet and then pokes out his ass. "Do I have anything on my butt?" He wiggles it. It's small and tight and Jesus, I want in it.
Before he has the chance to realize what's happening, I hurry to my feet, grab him and throw him over my shoulder, determined to have fun the way he said. "I'm going to tie you up and gag you so you stop teasing me."
"Oh my God, if this was meant to deter me, you totally failed." His laugh vibrates through me. He might have a point here. I didn't think this through very well, and Christ, when the fuck have I ever played around with anyone like this?
I put him down and he crosses his arms. "Hmpf. I liked it up there."
Yeah, I liked him up there too. He's standing so fucking close, and I picture that tight little ass of his. He pouts playfully, but all it makes me want to do is suck his bottom lip into my mouth.
I put my finger beneath his chin and tilt his head up. Derek gasps, and we're so fucking close. "So goddamned feisty. You're going to get me into trouble."
"Trouble's fun … get into trouble with me, Jackson."
My dick fucking aches, pulses as it fills. "I'm trying to be your friend."
"We can be friends too." He grabs my waist and licks his lip. I want to own that little mouth of his. Kiss him until he can't think straight.
My pulse is pounding in my ear. My skin is on fire. There's no getting past the part where I want him.
"Why do you want to fuck me?" I ask before brushing my thumb over his bottom lip just to feel the pillowy softness of it.
"Come on … I'd be a good first for you."
He'd be a good first for me.
It's just a different version of what he said the first night. Him owing me. Him doing it for another reason than plain want and desire. "That's not a good reason to sleep with someone." I step back.
"Oh my God." Derek drops his head back and groans. "I always feel like you're slut-shaming me. You were out to get a piece of ass the first night we met, just the same as I was out for dick."
I roll my eyes. "You're being dramatic. That has nothing to do with it. I don't care who anyone sleeps with, how many people, or how often they do it. I'm all for any kind of sex anyone wants to have and I sure as hell don't plan on getting into a relationship again right now, but I do plan to fuck, so that has nothing to do with it."