“That’s not what I meant, though. I meant like, she’s stronger than you think. She has a little something, I don't know. A spark or something. I didn't mean to imply that she had a plot in her mind.”
“Well if she's got some spark in her, why not that?”
Alek slaps his palms on the top of the counter. He guzzles his shot and then puts that down too. “Roman, did it occur to you that maybe you could, you know, lighten up? Why don’t you just calm the fuck down?”
“I think you know why,” I say to him.
He presses his lips together and shakes his head. “Just try, Roman. Please, for me. Just try to like her.”
“Yeah, you'd like that wouldn't you.”
“Honestly, I would. It would be really nice to not spend the rest of my days feeling like I ruined your life, Roman. It would be nice if maybe you could try just being, you know, half-ass happy or something for a minute.”
“And then what? You know she thinks we’re monsters.”
“Yeah, so what? We are monsters. So is every other guy she ever met. It's just monsters all the way down, Roman. You know that.”
I don’t want to talk anymore. Pushing past him, I rinse out my cup in the sink and leave it at the bottom like Marie instructed me to do after the seventh time I just left one on the counter. Then I head back out of the kitchen without another word. I'm tired. One million years of tired.
Coming to Chicago, I fully expected a new life. But it's always the same old shit. Everywhere you go, there you are.
CHAPTER 15
MARIE
“Well?” Gianna says, the moment that I walk into the cigar club.
I look around like I'm expecting a clue as to what she's talking about. “Well what?”
She rolls her eyes dramatically. “Well what?” she repeats. “Well how is it? How was it? How's the, you know, married life?”
“Oh. That.”
Coaching myself not to be too grumpy about the whole thing because Gianna still probably has some spark of optimism left in her naive little heart, I go back to the counter and stow my handbag underneath. Gianna is practically panting with excitement.
“Is he nice? Is he weird? Does he talk in his sleep in Russian? Come on, spill the beans!”
Shrugging, I look for a spray bottle of cleaner and a towel. I need something to do with my hands. “It's just, you know… I don't know.”
“No, I don't know!" she huffs. “I don't know at all, because you're not actually saying anything, Marie!”
“There's nothing to say. I mean… They're there all the time. The house is starting to smell like a barnyard. They eat so much… Oh my God, Gianna you would not believe it. We went through like two months worth of lasagna in about a week.”
“Seriously?” she says, as though this was the kind of detail she was waiting for. “What do they eat?”
“Pretty much everything.”
“They like Italian food?”
“Well, apparently. That’s what they’re getting anyway.”
“Interesting…”
I'm not sure how that could possibly be interesting to her, but if it's floating her boat right now then I guess that's fine. She takes the tin of lighter fluid and starts refilling all of our fancy antique lighters that go in every private room. Some of these have been in use since the club first opened. The one she's got in her hands is the one I like the most; it's milk glass and looks like a blob of cloud.
“And?” she finally asks, quirking her eyebrow at me. Currently it's in a dramatically arched shape with a geometric wedge near her nose, narrowing to a fine line that sweeps out over her eye. Truly amazing eyebrows. They’re like works of art.
“Well what?” I say irritably, pretending not to know what she's talking about.
“The sex!” she finally blurts out. “Sex! You're having sex now, right? How is it? Is it wonderful? Is it awesome? Does it change your life and shake your world and everything?”
“Gianna…”
“Are you doing it all the time? Are you sore? Are you limping? Are you pregnant already?”
“Gianna!”
“I mean, that wouldn't be the weirdest thing in the world, right? My cousin Annalisa got pregnant on her honeymoon. Well, that's what she told everybody? But I kinda think that probably she was pregnant before the wedding, even though she would never admit it. We'll see. Supposedly the baby is due in November and if anything pops out at the end of August weighing ten pounds, I guess we'll know for sure, huh? Ha ha!”
She is super excited. Her eyes are sparkling and her cheeks are flushed. I think Gianna is probably still a virgin. We sort of do that, or at least we’re supposed to. One of our charming family traditions. But she is utterly sex obsessed. If her dad doesn't marry her off, she’ll probably toss herself at the first penis that says hello.