I’m careful not to show them the back wall with the shelves stacked with the products I promote, or the other closet that’s jam packed with lingerie I’m sent to promote.
My embarrassing plea to Knox video went viral, and I got my target of ten million subscribers within days. I swear the whole nation saw it, but, miraculously, somehow this corner of Ohio missed it and no one in town knows what I do. Including Piper.
But as a result, I have triple the products to pimp as I did before. And my income has shot up as a result.
Darla is jealous of my new studio, especially since, and I quote “Your perfect specimen of a man built it with his own two fucking hands.”
She’s doing okay, her vlog hasn’t taken off like mine but she’s increasing her numbers daily. Along with the number of men in her life. She decided one man at a time wasn’t enough to please her in the bedroom and now exclusively engages in sex with two or more guys at a time.
Young, old, she’s not discerning, as long as there’s at least two cocks in the room. Knox and I nearly died laughing when we found out one of those men is often Marcus.
After it came out, Marcus confessed to Knox that he couldn’t get enough of her. He drives the hour to her place just for a booty call.
“Anyway, enough of the tour, I want to move on to today’s topic. It’s something you’re going to be hearing a lot about and I’m sure it’s something many of you struggle with. How to have good sex when you’re pregnant.”
“Let’s start with the early stages, as in, the stage I’m in now.” I pause to let my viewers digest the news.
It was no accident. The reason Knox officially asked me to move in, was because he decided with Piper in high school, and therefore practically all grown up, he decided he wanted another child.
Which sounded perfect to me. Playing mother to Piper flipped a maternal switch in me, and the thought of a baby in my arms was ideal. Plus I already know ahead of time what an amazing father he is. I have far too many friends whose husbands turned out to offer no support, other than playing sports with the kids and showing them age-inappropriate movies.
We made an appointment to have my IUD removed the very next day.
I carry on talking, “When your boobs are so tender and you want to smack your man if he goes anywhere near them.”
I certainly wanted to hit Knox hard last night when he put his hand anywhere near my breasts. I’d read they’d be tender at first, but holy hell, tender doesn’t begin to describe it. Of course Knox isn’t complaining, as they’ve gone up a cup size already and it’s only early days.
Piper is ecstatic to become a big sister. Now her would you rather questions are all on girl versus boy. “Would you rather have a baby who pees straight up in the air when you change him or one who takes forever to clean up after she poops?” Or “Would you rather have a baby who gets to wear cute dresses, or who you can dress up in a mini tuxedo?”
She’s already promised to do all the free babysitting we want. I wonder if she’ll start asking questions if we get her to babysit while we go into the garage for an hour or two.
High school has been great for her, since she was already so grown up going in. The transition to her new school went super smoothly, and she’s joined the debating club. She’s made lots of new friends, though she hasn’t brought any boys home yet. Knox would probably implode, but I’m here to back her up.
We haven’t heard anything more from her biological mother. Piper’s decided she doesn’t want anything to do with her, and that she doesn’t need her since she has me now.
The door opens, and Knox asks, “Ready?”
I spin the webcam around and bring Knox into the frame. “Here he is now everyone, meet The Unicorn.”
Knox scowls at the lens.
“Let’s do that again, can you smile this time?”
He flashes a big smile for me, and it lights up his whole, gorgeous face. No matter how many times I see it, it still melts my panties. My viewers are going to die when they see him. They’ll probably demand I put him in every video.
“Okay,” I say and stop recording. I’ll piece it all together in the edit.
“Come on.”
“Where are we going?”
“You’ll see.”
Knox holds open the door of his Thunderbird, and I climb in. He gets in the driver’s side, put the key in the ignition and turns it. But not enough to turn the engine over, just enough to turn the radio on.
“I put this radio in just for you.” He takes my phone and fiddles with the Bluetooth settings until my phone connects to the speakers.
“What happened to being true to the era?” He’s always so particular about restoring his cars.