Outlaw Hearts(151)

“Europe! Beth, we’d be apart almost two years if you don’t come home next summer.”

“I know.” Her eyes began to tear. “I can’t go that long without seeing you,” she told him. “I love you so, Lloyd.”

He studied her exquisite face, her skin so clear it looked like porcelain, her white-blond hair reminding him of an angel. He wondered if this was how his father had first felt about his mother, wanting her so badly he thought he might die if he couldn’t touch her. He wanted to do more than taste her mouth, more than just feel her breasts. He’d never even been with a woman in the fullest sense, hated it when Parker men teased him about sex and talked about the female anatomy.

He knew from being around animals all his life how the physical part of it was done, had dreamed about being with Beth that way many a night; and he knew from the deep love his parents shared that there was something beautiful about it, knew by the way his father talked about his mother when they were camped alone that there was something wonderful about having one special woman at his side. He knew it was something that transcended age and beauty, something that stayed the same no matter how long a man and woman were together. His parents still made love often. They tried to hide it, but it was impossible to shut out all sound in the cabin.

He touched Beth’s face. “I love you too, Beth. You know that. I don’t want to be apart either, but it’s best you do what your pa wants. What if we stayed right here and got married? You’d always wonder if maybe you should have gone on to finishing school, seen Europe and all. I want you to know for sure about us.” He pulled her close. “Besides, the way things are now, your pa so wealthy and all, hell, I’ve got a ways to go to be able to take proper care of you. I don’t want to leave you or my folks or this ranch, but I know I need the schooling. Your pa would never settle for you marrying a cowhand. The only reason he lets us see each other is because he knows I intend to go on to college and be a lawyer. He’s a powerful, determined man, Beth. He’d never let us be together any other way.”

Beth swallowed back tears. “You know I love you just like you are, Lloyd. I’d stay right here and live on your pa’s land with you if that was what you wanted. I just want to be together.”

He pressed her tighter, enjoying the feel of her against him. He allowed his hand to wrap itself into her long tresses that felt like silk. “I’d like that just fine myself, but if we ran off and got married now, your pa would always hate me, and I don’t want it to be that way. Besides that, you’re only sixteen. Someday you might wish you never would have settled so soon and for so much less than you’re meant for. We’ll just have to find a way to make the next couple of years go as fast as possible.”

She leaned her head back to look up at him, tears on her cheeks. “What if you go off to school and find somebody else?”

He wiped at the tears with his fingers. “You know me better than that. You’re my best friend, besides my own folks. In some ways we’re closer, because we share things we can’t even talk to our folks about. It’s going to be worse for me, you know, you being rich and beautiful and traveling the world. Hell, rich young men will be after you like…” God, how he hated the thought of any other man touching her. “I couldn’t stand it if you up and married somebody else, Beth. I feel like you already belong to me.”

“I do belong to you, Lloyd. My heart belongs to you, and if we have to be apart, I want this summer to be wonderful for us. I want to belong to you in every way, Lloyd.” Her cheeks reddened, and she rested her head against his chest, hugging him tightly. “I want you to remember me in a special way, to make me yours so I know I belong to you and you belong to me and that no matter what happens, you were my first man and I was your first and only girl. You’ve never been with anybody else, have you, Lloyd?”

He took a moment to weigh what she was telling him. Was it right? How could it be wrong, when they loved each other so much and this was their last summer together for two years, maybe longer? He kissed her hair, feeling a fire move through his body that culminated in an ache deep inside that made him feel like he might die with the want of her. “It’s always been you, Beth.”

She looked up at him again and whispered his name, and he bent closer, brushing her lips lightly at first, feeling the heat there. He kissed her then, a fierce passion ripping through him in that one moment that made him want to taste her with his tongue. She whimpered when he pushed his tongue between her lips and ran it deep, and he gripped her tighter when he felt her fingers dig into his shoulders.