“And you blame yourself?” Tom said when Cody finished.
“Of course I blame myself. Wouldn’t you?”
“Absolutely.”
That wasn’t what Cody expected to hear. “I thought you’d try to convince me I didn’t do anything wrong.”
“Only you can do that. All I can do is help you talk through it and give you some tools to cope until you decide to forgive yourself. One thing you’re going to have to accept is that you can’t change the past. At some point, you’re going to have to let it go because if you don’t, you’ll never be happy. Is that what you want? I ask because there are people who like being miserable. Are you one of those?”
“I want to be happy,” Cody whispered.
“Good, that makes my job a lot easier. I’m assuming you won’t be willing to take any meds to help control your depression?”
“No meds.”
“Thought so, but if you ever reach a point where you think about taking your life, you call me. Day or night. If it comes to that, I’ll insist on medication.”
“No, I’m past that.” And he was.
“The first thing I’m going to do is teach you some breathing exercises that will help relax you if you start feeling stressed or anxious. We’re also going to talk your nightmare into the ground. Doing that will desensitize the event itself. That’s called exposure therapy. It’s possible now that you’ve remembered the event, the nightmare won’t return.”
“That would be my greatest wish.”
“Ready to start?”
Cody nodded. “I’ve never been more ready.”
CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE
Riley sucked in a breath when the engine of Charlie’s red stunt plane cut off after a straight-up climb, and then turned as if in slow motion from nose up to nose down before spiraling straight for the ground. “Wow!”
“It’s called a hammerhead stall,” Ryan said.
She glanced at him to see if the stunt scared him as much as her. His eyes were glued to the plane. There was no way she could stand watching someone she loved risk their life like that.
“Start the engine, Charlie,” he said, when it seemed like there was no way she could pull up in time.
As if on cue, the engine sputtered to life, and the plane crossed in front of the grandstand so low that Riley thought Charlie was going to land, but no, off she went up again. “She’s amazing.”
Ryan grinned. “She so is.”
The man was besotted with Charlie. That was obvious by the pride she saw in his eyes as he watched his girlfriend defy death. “Do you ever fly with her?”
He laughed. “Oh, yeah. She leaves my stomach behind every time. Wanna go up sometime?”
Riley snorted. “Not ever.”
“Hannah wouldn’t, but Sugar sure as hell would,” Sugar said.
Jamie made a growling sound. “Hannah nor Sugar are setting foot in that plane.”
“Who’s Hannah?” Was there another couple she hadn’t met?
Sugar waved a dismissive hand. “Long story. I’ll tell you sometime.”
Well, that cleared things up. Riley shrugged and turned her attention back to Charlie and her plane, as she raced past them upside down. When Cody had backed out, she hadn’t wanted to come. She was glad now that she had as she really liked his friends.
For the afternoon, she was able to forget about stalkers and Pelli and a man who couldn’t conquer his demons. She was even laughing, surrounded by men who were hot and scary at the same time. The women were funny and really nice, and she hoped she could stay friends with them even if she wasn’t with Cody. The only ones missing besides Cody were Logan and Dani. Their little boy had woken up with a cold, so they’d stayed home.
Riley couldn’t help envying the couples surrounding her. Ryan, with that light in his eyes as he watched Charlie wow the crowd, Jamie fussing over his pregnant wife, and Jake whispering naughty things in Maria’s ear, if Maria’s giggle and blush were any indication.
Over the loudspeakers, the air show commentator announced the finale, which was a precision parachute team, and Riley was as impressed with them as she had been with the stunt planes. As they were leaving, Ryan asked what she thought.
“It was awesome. I’d love to come to one again.”
Ryan glanced at the planes coming in for a landing. “Great. I’ll let you know the next time Charlie has one. I’m going to go meet up with her now, so I’ll catch you later.”
“Want to get some dinner?” Maria asked.
“I’m going home, taking off my shoes, and putting my feet up while my husband makes me a big fat cheeseburger,” Sugar said. She laughed, patting her stomach. “It’s what baby wants.”