When she arrived home, Cody’s truck was parked in his driveway, but all his blinds were closed. Once she got the cats fed, she went to her bedroom window and opened it. He never did come out on his porch to play his guitar.
CHAPTER NINE
Friday morning, Cody sat in Kincaid’s office, determined not to squirm under the boss’s stare. The man was always intense and focused, and Cody hated that kind of attention on him. There was no one he respected more than his former SEAL commander, and there was no one he regretted disappointing more.
“If you mean to fire me, I understand,” he said when he finished explaining what had gone down in Iowa.
“I have no intention of firing you if you agree to one condition.”
Cody raised a brow, but he knew what was coming. Get help.
“It’s obvious that something happened in-country that you don’t remember. Probably the concussion played a part in forgetting, but I think whatever it was, subconsciously, you don’t want to remember. Which tells me that whatever you witnessed was some bad shit. These dreams you’ve been having aren’t good, Dog. You have to know that. Until you remember and deal with it, I can’t risk including you on any operations.”
“I understand.” And he did. Didn’t mean he was any less ashamed and embarrassed. “I guess you want me to take a leave of absence?”
Kincaid stood and went to a mini fridge. “Want a soda or water?”
No, he wanted a full bottle of scotch. “A water, please.” He’d been tempted to get so wasted that he couldn’t remember his name when he’d arrived home last night, but knowing he had this meeting first thing this morning, he’d resisted. Last thing he needed was to have shown up with red eyes and a hangover. Kincaid handed him the bottle, and Cody twisted the cap, downing half the contents.
Kincaid returned to his chair, setting a bottle of soda on his desk. “To answer your question, there’s plenty around here you can do until you’re ready to go back on a team. I have a good friend, Tom Bledsoe, who works with vets dealing with PTSD. I’ll call him and set up an appointment for next week. He’s a vet himself who lost a leg in Iraq, so he can relate.”
Swallowing the baseball-sized lump in his throat, Cody let out a breath. Good news: he wasn’t fired. Bad news: he had to see a shrink. The last thing he wanted to do was explore his inner psyche. Something told him there was some bad shit in there. He briefly considered quitting, but that would only be the beginning of a downward spiral from which there would be no return.
“Do you agree?” Kincaid asked.
“Not like I have a choice.”
Kincaid’s eyes narrowed. “You have all kinds of choices, so don’t give me that shit. I don’t turn my back on my men, but I expect them to do what it takes to be a fully functional member of the team, so lose the attitude. If you don’t accept that you have a problem and aren’t willing to take the help you’re being offered, then we’ll part ways right now.”
Chastised, and rightfully so, Cody stood and held out his hand. “You’re right, but then you always are. I have a problem and I need help.” That had been the hardest thing he’d ever admitted to, but in saying it, a seed of hope sprouted in his heart.
Kincaid clasped his hand with Cody’s. “Good. For a minute there, I thought I was going to have to beat some sense into you. Go catch up with what operations we have going on and make yourself useful. I’ll let you know when your appointment is after I talk to Tom.”
“Thank you. Although it might not have sounded like it, I do appreciate—”
“Nothing I wouldn’t do for any of you.”
And Cody believed him.
“One other thing.”
Cody wasn’t sure he could take one more thing. “What’s that?”
“I’m having a dinner at my house a week from tomorrow to celebrate Ryan and Charlie’s upcoming wedding. Bring a date.”
“Is that an order, sir?”
Kincaid studied him for a moment. “Yeah, it is. You need to get to know some women now that you live here. I’ll have Dani invite someone for you if you want.”
He didn’t want Kincaid’s wife setting him up with a stranger. “I have someone in mind.”
“Good. Now get to work.”
For the rest of the day, Cody buried himself in catching up with what missions K2 had going on, managing not to think about nightmares, shrinks, and his sexy neighbor.
When he arrived home a little after six, Riley’s car was in her carport. He decided to take a shower before walking over and asking if she’d go with him to Kincaid’s dinner. Instead of putting on his usual sweatpants once he was cleaned up, he chose a pair of jeans and a blue-and-white striped button-down shirt. After a moment’s consideration, he tucked it in and added a belt.