She blew out a long breath and mentally debated whether to actually ’fess up. But she supposed it was time for the truth. “I had a huge crush on you in high school. I was basically your stalker and you didn’t even know it. I could write your bio.”
He arched a brow. “Let’s hear it.”
“Hear what?”
“My bio. The things you think you know about me.”
“Oh, well…” She wasn’t sure how they’d gotten on this road, but she couldn’t back out now. He was watching her with those eyes that somehow always drew far too much of her truth from her brain and out her mouth. “I know you got Elisa pregnant at seventeen.”
“Everyone knew that,” he said.
“I know you had a promising football career with a scholarship on the line, but you gave it all up so that you could support her and the baby.”
“Anyone would’ve done that.”
“Actually,” she said softly, “no, they wouldn’t have. You made that choice for her and Troy’s future, not for yourself. I know that Elisa ended up getting to go to the college you’d wanted to attend.”
He took her coffee cup and set it on the counter. “Don’t make me out to be any kind of martyr. That’s not me.”
“My point,” she said, “is that you do whatever needs to be done. Even if it’s not in your own best interests.”
“Yeah, I gave up a scholarship,” he said, “but I got something out of it. Troy. He’s not all that into me at the moment and that’s likely to get worse for a little while, but I don’t regret any of the decisions I made. Because in the end they led me to him. I’ve screwed this daddy gig up more than a few times, but I plan on getting it right this time.”
“How did you screw it up?”
He was quiet a moment, studying her. “I don’t regret the navy,” he finally said. “That’s where I grew up. But I was away for long periods of time, and then the same on the rigs.”
“But that’s how you made the money you needed to support them,” she said.
“True, but…” He shook his head and she thought that was it. He was done talking.
“I nearly died there,” he said quietly, shocking her. “And I’d have left my son without a dad and my mom without a son to take care of her.” He met her gaze. “I set out to be a better man than I was a kid, and in doing so, I’ve learned that there are more important things than money.”
Her throat was tight when she said, “And you don’t see how good a man you are?”
“I’ve still got a lot to make up for.”
He wanted redemption for the wildness of his youth. He wanted to make amends. He wanted to man up and be a dad.
She admired the hell out of that.
Tanner’s phone buzzed and he read the text, his mouth going tight. “It’s from Elisa. I’ve got to go.”
She straightened and set down her coffee on the counter. “Is something wrong?”
“I’ve been summoned to the principal’s office.” His smile was grim. “Again. And here I thought those days were long gone.” He moved to the door.
“Tanner?”
He turned back. “Yeah?”
“Don’t doubt your ability to be a dad,” she said softly. “You’re a great one.”
He stared at her for a few beats and then moved back to her, planting one hand on either side of her body, caging her against the counter.
“What are you doing?”
“Getting ready to kiss you,” he said, voice low and…damn. Seductive as hell.
“You are?” she breathed. “Why?”
His mouth was at her ear but he lifted his head to look at her with a smile. “Because I want to.”
“You want to kiss me?” she whispered, needing to hear it again. She couldn’t help it; she’d dreamed of this for so long when she was younger.
“Yeah,” he said. “I want to kiss you. To start.”
Holy. Smokes. “But…” Her body quivered. Bad body. “But we talked about this. We’re both way too screwed up, remember?”
“I don’t feel screwed up right now.”
She felt her stomach clench a little, in a good way, the kind of excitement humming through her veins that she usually associated with opening a gallon of ice cream or a new bag of chips. “But your text…you have to go.”
“In a minute,” he said, staring at her mouth.
Oh boy. He wasn’t helping. In fact, he was making her want things. Lots of things, not a single one of them ice cream or chips. So she closed her eyes. This made him seem even closer. They weren’t touching, not a single inch, but she felt completely surrounded by him. Intimately so.