He smiled at her, looking rather relieved, and then he moved over her, settling between her legs. "You're insatiable."
"I've never been called that before, but it does seem to be true tonight."
"Must have something to do with being with me." His murmur was thick and sexy, and it made her shiver. Then she shivered again as he gently pulled her thighs apart so he could position himself at her entrance.
She gasped in pleasure as he pushed inside her. "Good. So good."
"Oh, yeah." His body had tightened as he entered her, and he held himself still, braced above her, when he was completely inside. "Damn, yeah."
She loved the way he said it-like he was completely overcome by the feeling of being inside her. She rolled her hips, smiling when he let out a helpless groan in response.
"Give me a minute, baby," he rasped, perspiration breaking out on his forehead.
She felt too eager to lie still, but she didn't want to torture him either, so she managed not to move for a minute while he caught his breath.
She'd never seen him like this before-like the real man was right on the surface, not hidden by teasing laughter or arrogant charm. Like he was finally, finally, close enough to touch.
He must have noticed her watching him when he opened his eyes, because he asked breathlessly, "Why are you looking at me that way?"
She gave a little shrug and reached up to brush a piece of hair back from his forehead. "I don't know. I've just never seen you like this before."
"Like what?"
"Like it's not just a game."
"How many times do I have to say it before you believe me? You're not just a game to me, Vanessa."
God help her, but she believed him. She took a shaky breath.
Then he lowered his head so he could kiss her gently on the mouth, and it felt like her heart was going to beat its way out of her chest.
As he kissed her, he started to move, pumping his hips in a slow, shallow motion. It felt so good she groaned into his mouth, and then his motion suddenly intensified. Their mouths broke apart and he thrust into her harder, although his rhythm was still steady and controlled.
"Wrap your legs around me, baby," he muttered, his eyes deep and hungry as they stared down at her.
She did as he said, whimpering with pleasure as the change in position allowed him to go deeper.
They moved together for a few minutes, nothing breaking the silence but the sound of their labored breathing. Her body was tightening around the penetration, and every move felt so good she couldn't wrap her mind around it.
"I want all of you, Vanessa," Joe said at last, tension and effort twisting on his face. "You know that right?"
She was almost crying from the pleasure of it-so much more than physical. "Me too. You let go too, Joe."
He made a guttural sound and tossed his head, but his rhythm didn't change.
"I mean it," she said. "Joe, please. I want to see you let go."
With another rough sound of his throat, something let loose inside him. He took her fast and hard, until her body was shaking and she was crying out helplessly. He'd started grunting, but soon the grunts changed into exclamations just as uninhibited as hers were. They were loud and rough and shaking the bed as climax finally consumed him.
She felt him freeze and then release, all of the tension breaking in his body, on his face.
Then he collapsed on top of her, and she wrapped her arms around him, feeling safe and warm and full and so much more she couldn't give words to.
She didn't need to put the feeling into words. He was obviously beyond speaking himself. He pressed a few kisses against the skin of her shoulder and she stroked his hair. His body was relaxing now, just the way hers was.
And she wondered if she'd ever been so perfectly satisfied in her life.
Saturday
Vanessa must have dozed off because it was after midnight when she next opened her eyes and glanced at the clock.
She was still pressed up against Joe, and one of his hands was still stroking slow lines down her hair, her back, and her bottom.
She felt really good. Relaxed. Cared for. Cherished.
She wondered if she was imagining it, or if somehow Joe really felt that way about her.
It felt like he did, but she'd been wrong before. She had to be smart. She couldn't offer up her heart to be crushed again.
On that thought, she tilted her head up to check out Joe's expression, and she saw that his eyes were very soft as he gazed at her.
"Hi," she said, stupidly.
His mouth twitched up in a smile. "Hi."
"Did I go to sleep?"
"For a little while."
"Did you sleep?"
"No."
"Why not?"
"I didn't want to wake up and have this all gone."
Her breath hitched as she processed the words. "Oh."
He raised his head so he could press a little kiss against her hair. His voice sounded more natural-amused and slightly teasing-as he murmured, "It's about time we did this."
"What do you mean?" Her heart was fluttering with both nerves and excitement, and her natural instinct was to skirt around the subject until she felt more comfortable.
"I mean I've wanted to do this for a really long time, and I'm pretty sure you have too."
She frowned. "That's kind of presumptuous."
"I know. But it doesn't mean it's not true."
"I've always thought you were an arrogant, obnoxious jackass."
"Sure. But that doesn't mean you don't want to have sex with me."
Her frown deepened. "For your information, arrogant, obnoxious jackasses are at the very bottom of my list of desirable sex partners."
He chuckled softly. "Maybe in general. But I'm pretty sure I rank much higher on the list."
"Shows what you know."
His hand slid back down to her bottom, rubbing gently at the cleft between her thighs.
"What are you doing?" she asked, squirming against him as little shivers of pleasure spiraled out from his touch.
"Proving my point."
She gasped and then moaned softly as he rubbed in slow circles until she came again-just a pleasant, quiet shudder of release.
"That's what I know," Joe murmured, a smile in his voice.
She gave him a glare for good measure, barely hiding a responding laugh.
He adjusted her so she was lying on top of him and he could reach her mouth. He kissed her so tenderly her chest ached.
"Why do you keep holding back?" he asked thickly, tangling his fingers in her hair.
"Holding back what?"
"You know what you're holding back. You want to give in to this. It's what both of us want."
"I did give in."
"To the sex. I mean everything."
She knew what he meant. She couldn't help but know. And he was right about the way her heart kept yearning toward his, as if drawn by a magnet or a flame. But the compulsion was as terrifying as it was thrilling.
She'd never expected to make love to anyone after Carl. He was going to be it for her-for the rest of her life. It almost felt like he was watching her, seeing her in bed like this with another man. Guilt rose inside her so strongly it almost strangled her.
She knew it was wrong to feel that way. She knew it was irrational. But she had trouble fighting back the feeling.
"We had sex once. It doesn't necessarily mean anything." She kept her voice light, pleased with her attempt to ignore the wave of guilt.
"It does mean something. You know it does." He kissed her again, as if to prove his point.
"I don't know," she mumbled, her throat tightening with emotion she didn't understand.
"Yes, you do." He spoke the words before more gentle kisses. "I get that you're scared. I get that you still feel guilty. But is that really enough to keep yourself from something so good?"
She didn't know. She just didn't know. But, for the first time, she was starting to imagine a life where she wasn't always just hanging on to what she'd lost.
Maybe Joe was right.
Maybe there was more.
She wanted it so much. Then she felt bad for wanting anything but Carl.
"I..." She swallowed hard. "I don't know."
He was smiling against her mouth now. "Well, think about it. Anything I can do to make the decision easier, just let me know."
She sighed and relaxed against him again, resting her cheek against his chest. He felt real and warm and alive beneath her. He was offering himself to her.
She wanted him. Maybe it was really all right to have him.
They were both silent for a few minutes, until she finally lifted her head again to check his expression. His eyes were focused on her, and there was a little smile on his face.
"What are you smiling about?" she asked, trying not to smile herself.
"I'm happy. Is that so wrong?"
"I don't know yet if there's anything to be happy about."
"I think there is." Before she could object, he added wryly, "Hey, at least I got laid. I've got to be happy about that."
"I'm sure you can get laid any time you want. Girls are always falling all over themselves to get to you."