“Nothing you need to worry about,” I say quickly.
“What the fuck?” JD asks.
“What?” I ask back. “I don’t want her thinking about what we do.”
“Why?” Blue interrupts.
“Yeah,” JD says, all pissed off. “She already knows. That’s something I never understood about you, Ark. Why the fuck do you care what people think of our business?”
“It’s porn,” I say. Like, hello?
“So? Ray is the King of Porn here. And he never has a problem telling people what he does. We’re opening up our own site in a few weeks. There’s no way you’re gonna be able to rationalize it then.”
“I’m not worried about rationalizing it.”
“Bullshit. You hate the fact that we make porn. You’d rather do anything else, but you can’t because condos, and sports cars, and whatever you spend your money on, aren’t free. You’re only in this for the money.”
“And your point?” I roll my eyes in Blue’s direction, but she’s got a serious look on her face that makes me stop and reassess. “Do you want to know what he’s gonna do tonight? I mean, really? You want me to tell you how we’ve got a girl lined up to suck his dick in a crowded club right there on the dance floor?”
She ducks her head and chews on her bagel. “It’s none of my business what you guys do.”
“Jesus fuck. What’s wrong with the two of you? Don’t you have any feelings, Blue? It doesn’t bother you that JD will have another woman on her knees tonight?”
“You’re an asshole,” JD says to me.
“Why? You wanted to talk about work.”
“Because you want to hide it. We’re not doing anything wrong.”
“Last week we weren’t doing anything wrong, this week we are.”
“Why’s that?” he snarls. “This week you’re too good for porn?”
“No, asshole. Because this week we’re in a relationship.”
Relationship.
Wow. For a guy who was resistant up to the last second, once he’s in, he’s all in.
JD laughs. “We’re fucking her, Ark. We’re not marrying her.”
I slip down off the counter. “I’m gonna take a bath, if that’s OK.” They both stare at me as I walk between them and head towards the hallway. Their arguing continues after I’m gone. I can still hear them in the bedroom.
How are these two guys even friends? I don’t get it. They could not be more different.
I close the door so I don’t have to hear the argument. It’s stupid, anyway. They make porn. They are scum. Not talking about it won’t change that fact.
I walk into Ark’s bathroom and start the water for the tub. I spot the morning-after pill package in the trash and it makes me even more confused. He’s so strait-laced. He’s so put-together on the inside. If it wasn’t so disconcerting, I’d laugh about it. Because I don’t get how a guy this practical and logical carves out a kingdom making and selling porn.
He does not add up. Not one bit. The half-ass dress suits? I mean, I love the look. He’s rough in a very neat way. The untucked white shirt. The loose tie. Why wear a tie like that? Why bother with a tie that’s not neat? Always jeans and boots and that tattoo they have, dragons fighting over some blue pearl. Where the hell did he come from? It’s like Ark can’t decide if he’s a biker or a businessman.
And JD… Jesus. I have no idea what to think about him. The way Ark talks, he’s insane or something. He’s unstable. He’s got ‘issues’. What kind of issues? So he takes off every now and then. If I could leave this loft, I’d be gone too. But just like the things with Ark, there’s something there with JD too.
Relationship?
Is that what this is?
I look up and find my face staring back at me from the mirror. “What are you doing?” But the girl on the other side doesn’t answer. Instead there’s a knock at the door. “Come in,” I say.
Ark pushes it open and stands at the threshold holding his camera. JD is behind him. Neither of them say anything and I’m immediately ticked off at this. “What?”
Ark opens his mouth, but JD is the one who answers. “Never mind our bitching, Blue. We do this all the time.”
But I know somehow, deep inside me, that isn’t true. I think that before I came, nothing upset these two. I think before I came, they hadn’t had an argument in months. Maybe years.
But fuck it. If they want to lie, I’ve got enough lies of my own I need to keep telling. So whatever. “Wanna join me in the tub?” I say instead. “It’s huge. We can probably all three fit.” Ark walks past me and peers inside the tub. He looks back at me and JD, then the tub again. Like he’s calculating the volume or something. “My God, do you always overthink things?”