“He also called me.”
“Why?”
“Because he desperately wants to see you. And he wants to find a way to make reparations without going to prison. He thought I might be able to help.”
“You shouldn’t. This is all on him. You’ve already done too much.”
“I wouldn’t really be helping him.”
She turned to the window, not that she could see anything with her eyes filling with tears. Again. Nine days had gone by, and she was still a mess.
“I want to see him,” she said. “But I don’t know if I want to see the man he is now. Maybe I should just stick to the memories. I have a different family now.” Her voice barely came out a whisper. She’d never said it out loud before. It had been true for a while, at least with Neil, and now she had other people she cared about.
Kensey felt reasonably sure Sam was someone she could count on. Who Kensey would do anything for. The only glitch was that Sam kept calling, trying to convince her to get in touch with Logan.
Logan, who hated her, but had put his ass on the line for her, anyway. He’d lost so much because of her, which was made infinitely worse by the fact that she was desperately in love with him. She’d tried to deny it, but that didn’t lessen her pain.
“I’ve waited too long to say this to you,” she said. “Thank you. So much.”
“You’ve said it at least a dozen times since you returned.”
“Not for going against my wishes, I haven’t.” She walked over to his desk. It was beautiful, like the one in Tarrytown, only this one was more elegant. It went with the rest of his huge office. All rich wood, gorgeous bookshelves filled with leather-clad tomes he’d actually read. Needless to say, the artwork was stunning. But none of that mattered more than his friendship.
“I was furious with you. And disappointed. It took me a while, but I know that everything you did, you did because you care about me. And you recognized that I wasn’t thinking clearly. You’re more than I deserve.”
“Not true at all. I’m exactly what you deserve.”
She smiled.
“Have you said that to Logan?”
Her spirits spiraled like a windless kite. “No.”
“You should. He risked a lot.”
She nodded. “I know. I wish a lot of things were different, but involving him, and you and Sam, that wasn’t fair. I hope I never do anything so foolish again.”
“I assure you, if the circumstance calls for it, we’ll be there. Now, about your father?” Neil waited calmly. It was one of his best and worst traits. “You deserve the truth,” he said when she remained quiet. “Whatever it turns out to be.”
Her phone rang. It was Sam. Kensey hesitated.
“Go ahead,” Neil said. “I have a teleconference anyway.”
“Hi, Sam.” Kensey headed for her own enclave a few doors down. Her shelves were stocked with books on art, so many that she’d lost count ages ago. She skirted her tidy desk, and settled in her overstuffed chair. “Good timing.”
“Great.” Sam sounded too cheerful. “What did Logan say when you spoke to him?”
“Very tricky,” Kensey said. “I haven’t called him. He hasn’t called me.”
“You’re both idiots. And I’m not talking about your IQs, although they might come into play if you don’t do something. Tell me you don’t miss him like crazy.”
“That’s the problem. I do. But he hates me. He told me flat-out we were done, and then he never looked at me again.” The tears came, though not the subtle kind like earlier. She started bawling like a baby.
“Oh, God,” Sam said. “Please don’t cry. This is why I like computers. They never cry. I don’t know what to say to you. So, you can’t do this all the time. I feel completely helpless, but I really want to be your friend. Just tell me what to do.”
Kensey sniffed. “I don’t know. I’ve never had friends. Or been in love.” There. She’d said it out loud.
“About time you admitted it.”
She grabbed a tissue. Just in case. “This is all new to me. I want your friendship, too. You’re amazing, and you’re funny and sweet. I owe you, big time.”
“You mean that?”
“Of course I do.”
“Then call him. Please. You’re both so close to getting this right. You trusted me for other things, now I’m asking you to trust me as your friend. Call him.”
Kensey closed her eyes. If Sam was right it would change everything. But if she was wrong, Kensey’s world would shatter. Living in limbo certainly wasn’t doing her any favors. “Fine. I will. I’ll call him.”
“Now.”
“No. It’s bad enough I just cried hysterically. I have an appointment in thirty minutes.”
“Then when?”
Sam really wasn’t letting up. “Tonight. From home. Okay?”
“Promise?”
“Yes.”
“Cool. If you like me now, you’re gonna love me later.”
Kensey smiled. “We’ll see. I’ve got to go. I have mascara all over my face.”
* * *
IT WAS ALMOST SEVEN, and Kensey was still pacing. She’d made a salad for dinner but ended up opening a bottle of wine and just having that. She was on her second glass, and she was still jumpy and fearful. What had happened to her calm, cool exterior? She’d perfected the walls around her for ten years, and in four days they’d crumbled.
No wonder she’d never fallen in love before. It was horrible. A nightmare. God, how did people survive this?
Another sip of wine and she got all the way to the counter, where she’d put her phone. She reached for the damn thing, and nearly jumped out of her skin at the knock on the door. Damn. Stella. Her neighbor had threatened to come by but Kensey had forgotten. When she opened the door, it wasn’t Stella.
“Hey, uh,” Logan said, “is this an okay time? I know I should’ve called...”
She nearly tripped on her own feet scrambling back to let him in. He looked gorgeous, tall and lean in dark jeans and a gray Henley. She was still in the black sheath dress she’d worn to work. He crossed the threshold and her heart fairly beat out of her chest.
Eventually, she shut the door, while he was still checking out her place. The co-op was huge for New York. The open-plan kitchen and living room made it look even bigger.
“This is great,” he said, and she heard his nervousness despite the blood rushing past her ears. It shocked her. Why would he be...
“Not really surprised about the art on your walls, and I do like your taste. For the most part.”
“Yeah?” She almost wept with the way he’d steered the conversation to something comfortable, at least for her. “Which part doesn’t do it for you?”
“This one,” he said, motioning to the Rothko print. “It’s just stripes.”
“If you don’t feel it, you don’t. It speaks to me.”
Logan turned. “I’d ask you what it says, but I’d like to speak to you first.” He winced, but she didn’t think she was supposed to have seen that. Again, he’d calmed her down at his expense. Or maybe she was reading too much into things.
“I wanted to call you.” She felt her face heat, the wish for a happy ending so strong it was difficult to think. “Wine?”
“Sure.”
Halfway to her fridge, she stopped and looked back at him. The way he was staring at her stole her breath. “I have beer. It’s not Pliny, but it’s from a local brewery.”
His grin was like the one in her dreams. “Now you’re talking.”
She gave him his beer, and topped off her glass, amazed she hadn’t spilled anything. They moved to the living room and she offered him the couch. She took the chair directly opposite.
“I’m sorry,” he said.
Confused and a little alarmed she asked, “What for?”
“Being a jerk. You owed me nothing, but when you asked me to trust you, I walked away. I’m sorry for that. It took me some time to realize my anger wasn’t with you at all.”
“Okay,” she said, remembering the moment where she could have just told him everything and things would have been so much easier. But she never blamed him for being pissed off.
“Wait, that’s not where I wanted to start. I read in the papers that your father was cleared, so that’s great. And they found the people who’d framed him.”
“It was. I had nothing to do with it. It was all Neil. Of course he knew the right people.” She inhaled. “And what you... It took me too long to realize what you’d done by having me take that picture of you and Holstrom in front of the Degas. It helped Neil convince the authorities to act. Without implicating me.” She smiled self-consciously. “But of course you knew that, so thank you.”
“Technically, only my arm made it into the photo.”
“Neil told me you offered to testify if necessary.”
Logan shrugged, modest to the end. “Have you seen your dad yet?”
She shook her head. “I can’t decide whether I want to or not. I mean, I’m glad he isn’t behind bars.”
“You’ll figure it out. Just go with your instincts.”