Raney felt a weird churning in her stomach at the memory of the conversation with Anne, the bride-to-be. After a lunch they’d all had together, during which Raney and Justin had spent the whole time talking to each other, Anne had teasingly asked if maybe Raney was interested in Justin.
Back then, Raney had been sure the answer was no.
“I didn’t say I didn’t like him! I just said he spent the whole time talking to me about Lord of the Rings, and I had no idea what he was talking about most of the time – so I couldn’t ever imagine dating him. That doesn’t mean I didn’t like him. We just have nothing in common.”
Raney had been telling the truth back then, as she usually did. But, as soon as she’d said the words to Anne, she’d started to wonder if they were right.
Justin wasn’t anything like the alpha-type men she was used to, but she kept thinking about him, even after he’d gotten less friendly with her.
She thought about him a lot.
“Okay,” Meg said. “So maybe he figured that out too, and that’s why he got less friendly. I mean, he’s not totally clueless so maybe he decided you weren’t interested in hearing about hobbits, so he pulled back.”
“He wasn’t talking about hobbits. He was talking about the languages—elvish or whatever. He could even talk in them, even though they were made-up languages.”
Meg laughed. “He was actually talking to you in elvish? Did you pretend to be interested in all that?”
“I thought some of it was interesting. He was all excited about it. But I’ve never read the books or seen the movies, so he had to go back to the beginning with the whole explanation. Anyway, that’s all I meant to Anne. I didn’t mean I didn’t like him. And I can’t figure out what I might have done to offend him.” She frowned, once again hit with that nagging question that wouldn’t go away, no matter how much she told herself it didn’t matter.
“I’m sure he wasn’t offended. He probably just got busy with the rest of his life. But don’t blow it out of proportion. It doesn’t really matter if he likes you or not, does it?”
Raney’s frown deepened. It didn’t matter. It just felt like it mattered. “I guess not. We’re so different, it’s not like we’ll be best friends or anything anyway. But I normally get along well with people, and I don’t want any sort of weirdness to get the way of the wedding.”
“No. Anne is already kind of nervous and tense, so I don’t think we want to worry her with anything else. Justin is Jake’s brother and—“
“I know! That’s why I haven’t said anything. Please don’t tell her. I’m sure it will be fine. It’s nice of him to pick me up. Maybe he has just been busy or distracted or something.”
“I’m sure you’ll get along great on the ride down. I really think it’s just because he’s kind of shy. You’re so pretty that maybe he feels even more shy around you.”
Raney didn’t argue because she didn’t want Meg to worry, but she knew very well that Justin wasn’t shy with her.
He’d never seemed awkward when he was talking to her. He’d never looked self-conscious or anxious. He might have grown up a geek, but he didn’t appear to be socially challenged.
He was brilliant, successful, and kind of cute, and he probably made a lot of money at his job. He wouldn’t have any trouble finding women to be interested in him. He wasn’t like the guys Raney normally dated, but there must be tons of women who would jump at him with the slightest sign of encouragement.
Raney had always been popular. She genuinely liked people—all kinds of people—and she was small and blond and basically pretty so she’d never had any trouble getting guys to ask her out. She wasn’t particularly smart or talented, but she was good with people. It was the one thing she’d never had any trouble with.
Lately, she’d been feeling kind of aimless and at loose ends. She used to room with Meg and Anne, but that had changed several months ago when Anne moved in with Jake. Now Raney didn’t feel as deeply a part of her friends’ lives as she used to, and it was made worse because she was having to live with her parents, which felt like a definite step backward in adulthood. She’d always looked to relationships for emotional investment, but she hadn’t even had a boyfriend for a few months—the longest she’d gone without a boyfriend since high school. She just couldn’t summon up any interest in the guys who’d asked her out lately.
She was twenty-seven. At her age, most women had fully settled into their lives, but Raney just didn’t feel like she was there yet. The only thing she had going for her at the moment was that she was good with people, and it really bothered her that her gift was failing her with Justin.