One Night to Risk It All(4)

                “He’ll like you because you’re the kind of woman who drives men crazy.”

                “Not so much anymore.” Flirting, toying and teasing had ended badly for her eleven years ago, and Ajax had certainly never acted as if she’d driven him crazy.

                “Lies,” Alana said, waving her hand. “Live dangerously for a minute, babe. Before you stop living altogether.”

                Rachel couldn’t take her eyes off him, not even to shoot her friend the evil eye, which is what she should really be doing. “Did you read that on a fortune cookie?”

                “Ever had an orgasm with an actual man? ’Cause I have. So...”

                At the mention of orgasms, Rachel’s cheeks burned. No, no she hadn’t. She’d given them a few times, yes, but never received. “Fine. I’ll go talk to him,” she said. “Talk to. Not orgasm with. Lower that suggestive eyebrow of yours.”

                “Okay. And I’ll be close. So if you...you know, need anything, text.”

                “Also I have mace,” Rachel said. “Ajax insisted.”

                She winced as she mentioned her fiancé’s name. But she wasn’t going to do anything, not really. She was just going to go talk to Shirtless Sailor Stud. She wasn’t going to do anything inappropriate.

                It was all about having a moment. Just a moment. To be brave and reckless, and not so much like the Rachel she’d been this past decade. To know what it was like to chase a moment that wasn’t bound up in the expectations of other people.

                Just a moment. To talk to a guy because she thought he was cute. Nothing more.

                She took a breath and tossed her hair over her shoulder. “Wish me...well, not luck exactly.”

                Alana winked. “Get lucky.”

                “No. I’m not cheating on Jax.”

                “Okay,” Alana said.

                “I’m not.” The very idea was laughable. There were people who were like that. Bold people who went around carpe-ing diems all over the place. But that wasn’t her. Not anymore. She wasn’t sure that had ever been her. Her rebellious years had been just that. Rebellion. Not just a desire for freedom, but a desire to push against the bonds that had always held her in place. Until she’d realized just how much that behavior affected other people. Just how much it could affect her. Not just her present, but her entire future.

                But just saying hi wasn’t so bad. There was no harm in giving herself a moment to bask in the heat that this stranger gave off.

                “Riiiight,” Alana said.

                “Shush.” Rachel turned and walked toward the dock, her hands shaking, her body rebelling in every way against what she was about to do. Sweaty palms, heart beating so fast she was pretty sure she was going to faint, mouth watering with sickness. Yep, the signs to run and preserve herself were all there.

                But she ignored them.

                She looked back at Alana one more time, who was standing at the wall still, watching. Then she turned back to her target.

                She would just say hi. And maybe flirt. Just a little harmless flirting. She half remembered how that went. She’d been a master of the tease back in the day. Batting her eyes and touching a guy’s shoulder, all while never intending to do anything more than use his interest to boost her ego. It had been a game then. Fun.