‘Information.’ My bravery diminishes at the sight of his straight lips and tight jaw, but I find the courage to continue. ‘Your habits.’
‘My habits?’ He raises his eyebrows, almost in warning.
I push on carefully. ‘You’re very . . .’ I stop myself to choose my words wisely. ‘Exact.’
‘You mean tidy?’
This is more than tidy. This is obsessive, but I’m getting the feeling that he’s sensitive about this subject. ‘Yes, tidy,’ I relent. ‘You’re very tidy.’
‘I make sure I take care of what’s mine.’ He reaches forward and pinches my nipple, making me jerk on top of him. ‘And you are now mine, Olivia Taylor.’
‘I am?’ I sound shocked, but I’m secretly delighted. I want to be possessed by him every moment of every day.
‘Yes,’ he says simply, taking my waist and pulling me down until our foreheads meet. ‘You are also my habit.’
‘I’m a habit?’
‘You’re an addictive habit.’ He kisses my nose. ‘A habit that I never plan on giving up.’
I don’t hesitate to let him know my thoughts on him and his new habit. ‘Okay.’
‘Who said you have a choice?’
‘You said you’d never make me do anything I don’t want to,’ I remind him.
‘I said I’d never make you do anything that I know you don’t want to do, and I know that you really want to be my habit. So this is a pointless discussion, wouldn’t you agree?’
I scowl at him, stumped for any comeback. ‘You’re cocky.’
‘You’re in trouble.’
I retreat on his lap. ‘What do you mean?’ I ask. Is he warning me?
‘Let’s talk about yesterday evening,’ he suggests, like we might be discussing where to have dinner. I’m instantly on my guard, and my chest falling onto his and my face hiding in his neck is evidence of this.
‘We’ve already talked about it.’
‘Not at length. I’m none the wiser as to why you behaved so recklessly, Livy, and it makes me uncomfortable.’ He wrestles me out of his chest and holds me in place. ‘When I’m talking to you, you look at me.’
I keep my head down. ‘I don’t want to talk to you.’
‘Hard luck.’ He’s moving, making himself more comfortable. ‘Explain yourself.’
‘I got drunk, that’s all.’ I don’t mean to, but I’m gritting my teeth and looking up at him through pissed off eyes. ‘And stop talking to me like I’m a delinquent child.’
‘Then stop behaving like one.’ He’s deadly serious. I’m stunned.
‘You know what?’ I push up and get out of the bath, and he does nothing to stop me. He just lies back, all relaxed and completely unaffected by my little tantrum. ‘You might make me feel incredible, say some beautiful things when you make love to me, but when you behave like this, all . . . all . . . all . . .
‘All what, Livy?’
‘You’re a self-righteous prick!’ I spit desperately.
He’s not at all fazed. ‘Tell me why you disappeared. Where did you go?’
His demanding questions only heighten my fury . . . and my desperation. ‘You said you’d never make me do anything I didn’t want to.’
‘That I know you don’t want to. I can see a burden weighing down my sweet girl.’ He reaches for me with his hand. ‘Let me ease it.’
I look at his hand for a few moments, my mind racing with only one worry. He’d leave me again if I ever told him. ‘You can’t.’ I turn on my bare feet and stalk away. I can’t stand this. Miller Hart is a roller-coaster ride, tossing me from untold pleasure to indescribable anger, from confident to timid and nervous, from pure joy to painful hurt. I’m being constantly pulled in two directions and while I know full well how I felt when he abandoned me before, at least the despair was consistent. At least I knew where I was. I’ll make the decision this time.
Cold and wet, I pull open the bottom drawer of the chest and take my knickers, bag and shoes, then hurry into his wardrobe and grab the first shirt that I lay my hands on, tossing it over my shoulders and dropping my shoes to the floor. Once I’ve slipped my knickers on and my feet into my heels, I make my escape, running across his bedroom, down the corridor and into the lounge, desperate to hide from his pressing questions and disapproving tones. I know that I was reckless last night. My mistakes are plentiful, but none as big as the man who I’ve just left in the bath. I don’t know what I’ve been thinking. He won’t understand.