He drove me to my apartment, and I welcomed him inside even though the tiny kitchen still cluttered with pots and pans and messes from the tacos. I wished I could’ve hidden it, but Dad smirked.
“Looks like my place. Like father, like daughter.”
I hated myself for sniffling and being so sensitive. “Sorry, Dad.”
He pulled me into a hug. “Don’t you sorry, Dad me. Tell me what’s happening. Why aren’t you getting ready for the wedding?”
“Lindsey kicked me out.”
“She what?” Dad pulled away. “Why?”
My lip trembled. He’d hear it soon enough anyway. “Because…I’m pregnant.”
He didn’t yell.
Didn’t swear.
I held my breath as Dad plopped into the couch and stared at the wall. He cleared his throat. Once. Twice. Three times?
Uh-oh. He was upset.
“I’m so sorry, Dad.”
Dad’s eyes widened. He looked at me and broke into a smile. “Don’t be sorry about a baby, Mandy. Never be sorry about a baby.”
The pressure eased, but my conscience didn’t. I didn’t know what to say.
“I’m not apologizing for the baby,” I said. “I’m…I’m sorry I disappointed you.”
He pulled me onto the couch with him. I rested my head on his shoulder just like when I was little.
“You haven’t, Mandy. How…did this happen? Is it Nate’s?”
“How did you—”
“I told you. You can’t keep anything from your dad…” He flinched. “Except a pregnancy, I guess. But I think I would have figured it out after a couple months.”
“Probably.”
“Do you care about this boy?”
I nodded. “I do. But…he didn’t take the news well.”
Dad tensed. “Why? What did he do?”
“He offered to marry me.”
Dad’s sigh of relief was unnecessary. “Sounds like he did the right thing.”
“No, he didn’t. No one understands. Dad, I can’t marry him because of a baby. We’ve only been together for these past three months, and during most of them, I was hiding.”
“Hiding?”
“I’ve been trying to keep this a secret until after the wedding, when I could tell everyone without worrying about pissing Lindsey and Mom off. I tried to avoid everything that happened just now, and it went even worse than I could have imagined. Nate’s mad. Mom’s lost it completely. Lindsey is furious.”
Dad tugged me closer. “Mandy, what’s the real reason you kept it secret?”
“Real reason?”
“I know you. You’ve never hidden from anything in your life. You face your problems head on…or, you used to. Why did you really hide?”
I didn’t ask if he meant hiding the truth from Nate or the rest of our family. I swallowed.
“Our family has been through enough,” I said. “I wanted one event that might have made us feel whole again. Everyone’s been fighting and angry. I thought if I took the brunt of all the insanity, maybe I could keep everyone calm enough to…I don’t know. Be a family again, if only for a night.”
I felt stupid saying it, like I was a little girl who couldn’t understand why her parents split. I did understand, but that didn’t mean I liked it. Dad ruffled my hair. I smirked.
“I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but I haven’t been taking your divorce very well,” I said.
Dad chuckled. “In case you hadn’t noticed, neither have I.”
“It’s just…no one seems happy. I always thought love would be like…a fairy tale. You’d know the instant you were meant for someone, you’d get married, and it’d be…perfect.”
“There’s your problem,” Dad said. “There is no perfect relationship, just like there’s no right time for a baby. Every couple is different. They love and they hate and they desire each other, and none of it is the same for other people. Don’t measure your possible happiness based on the misery of others. Not when you deserve to experience all the love in the world.”
“But what happens if it fails?”
“Marriage is not solely about love. It’s work and commitment. I don’t believe any two people are meant to be, but I know plenty of people who rely on fate and chance to solve their problems. You have to nurture your relationship. That’s the secret of marriage, and that’s why mine failed. And it’s also why I’ve been trying to get your mother back. I know how it should be done now.”
I sighed. “I can’t believe you’re so forgiving.”