Her eyes welled with tears.
And I knew I fucked up.
“You slept with everyone?” Mandy whispered. “Are you that…sleezy?”
“Oh, come on.” Carmen laughed. “He’s a manwhore. We reap what we sow with him. He had his fun, we had ours.” She winked. “You oughta give him a run, Mandy. He might loosen you up.”
No. I wouldn’t. Mandy gritted her teeth.
“How…” Her breathing quivered. “I think you should go.”
“Mandy—”
“Now, Nate.”
Son of a bitch. The girls groaned. I ignored them. Mandy ducked out of the living room, but she pushed me away before I could get too close. She led me to the door.
I couldn’t leave it like this.
“I guess you’ve had us all now,” she said. “Unless you’re aiming to sleep with the bride, it’s time for you to go.”
“It’s not like that,” I said. Damn it. “It was a one-time thing with all of them. You know. That’s why you wanted me in the first place. Just some fun.”
“Yeah. I should have known better. This isn’t fun.”
“I’m sorry. Let me explain.”
“I really can’t deal with it right now.” She couldn’t look at me, and I had no idea what I had lost until I missed the honey-amber of her eyes. “I thought what we had was special.”
“It was.”
“Please, go.”
A couple tears rolled over her cheeks. I made her cry?
How the hell did I make her cry?
“Mandy, if I knew sleeping with those girls would have made you feel like this—”
“You have no idea how I feel about this, about us, about you—” She pushed me to the door. The rest of her words dissolved into a choked sob.
I hated to see her upset, but, at that moment, she just hated to see me.
The front door slammed in my face. I didn’t care.
Her words echoed in my mind. I had no idea how she felt about us…about me?
Holy shit.
I nearly tumbled off the porch.
Did Mandy have feelings for me?
11
Mandy
“Honestly, the dress doesn’t even look like it was made for you!”
For the first time since the wedding planning began, I shared Lindsey’s dismay.
Nothing about the hideously teal bridesmaid gown fit me. The bustles had no lift, the bows no liveliness, and the strapless cups…
Well, I made short work of them.
The last thing I needed was anyone staring too intently at my body, but it was way too early for any real changes right?
I looked down. My breasts were trying to suffocate me, but everything else seemed halfway normal. I thought. Maybe?
I hadn’t looked in the mirror yet, waiting for the moment Lindsey or Mom or one of the bridesmaids called out some sort of un-hideable baby bump. If it happened, I couldn’t even blame a big lunch. It’d been hell to just sip soup. Nothing stayed down except copious amounts of oranges, and that was risky because citric acid did not make for a pleasant return experience.
I pinched my eyes shut. The hot lights of the bridal boutique shined like an interrogation.
This was it. The jig was up. My bun was in the oven, and they turned on the heat.
“When did you lose weight?” Lindsey plucked at the bunched material over my waist. “No…when did it all go to your tits?”
Mom frowned, rubbing her chin. “It must be the lighting. Mandy isn’t that small.”
Thanks, Mom.
But the measurements confirmed it. I was different from the first fitting. I lost weight.
Well, that was a relief. Or was it? The doctor did warn that it wasn’t uncommon for women to lose weight in early pregnancy because of the morning sickness, especially if they happened to be a little curvier. And I couldn’t really eat much but fruit and crackers.
Okay. Another freebie. I breathed a quick sigh.
“Who measured her the first time?” Lindsey whirled around to berate the terrified seamstress and owner of the boutique. “We’re lucky the hem isn’t dragging on the floor too!”
“Well, we were all supposed to go on a diet,” I said.
“Yeah, which some people have forgotten to do!” Lindsey pointed at her other teal and miserable bridesmaids. “I made the spreadsheet, why aren’t you guys logging your weight? We’re supposed to be doing this together.”
I heard the edge of real panic in my sister’s voice. That stress peaked when the zipper to her dress needed a bit of encouragement to climb past her booty. We got it zipped, but Lindsey immediately peeled it off and threw away half of the candy bar she was nervously eating.
My sister pushed me to the dressing room. She waited outside, lowering her voice so those beyond the fitting areas couldn’t hear.