“No. They have a cold. You have a baby.” She counted off on her fingers. “You’re sick. You’re exhausted. Your breasts have swelled.”
“Thanks for noticing?”
“Is your period late?”
“No, my period is not…”
Uh-oh.
I whipped out my phone.
No, no, no.
I checked the date and did a bit of mental math in my head. “Okay, wait. This is ridiculous. I’m not…I can’t be…Lachlan and I haven’t really…”
I counted the days.
The river!
No way.
I gripped the sink. Louisa offered me a smile.
“I’ve seen it a lot lately,” she said. “All these new girls floating around the Rivets’ players. Girlfriends and wives. First Leah Carson. Then Piper Hawthorne. I mean...it’s an epidemic! I don’t know what it is about these football players. This team is just built to breed.”
She gestured for me to follow, though I had no idea how I willed my feet to move. I followed her to her office as she rifled in her desk for a stack of pregnancy tests.
“Just thought it was prudent to keep some around,” Louisa said. “No fertile woman is safe around this field. If it was my decision, I’d make the guys put on a condom under their cups.”
“This isn’t happening.”
“Go.” She sorted through stray bits of equipment, tape, ice packs, and other bits and ends from her first aid kit. “You’ll wanna know.”
“Will I?”
“First comes love, then comes marriage.”
Yeah right. Maybe if the orders were reversed.
I was under no obligation to love Lachlan until that third date, and I sure as hell didn’t have the space in my apartment around the shelves and other breakables for a baby carriage.
Taking the test might have been without a doubt, the single most humiliating moment of my life, but the two minutes it took for the test to register positive was a trial by fire.
Pregnant.
I was pregnant.
I wasn’t ready for two whammies in the day.
First team-wide espionage and a corporate controversy. Now a baby?
Lachlan Reed’s baby.
I wasn’t entirely sure he could tie his shoes without tourniqueting a finger. And now I was carrying his child?
Louisa didn’t seem surprised. She moved a chair behind me before I plunked down on the floor.
“Congratulations,” she said. “New husband. New baby. How’s that for a Happily Ever After?”
How was it?
How about un-freaking-believable?
No one told me I had even started a Once Upon A Time!
14
Lachlan
“You look weird.”
Sebastian sat on the bathroom counter, getting comfortable in my tux’s jacket.
Apparently, he took the role of fashion police seriously. Or maybe he was just a ball buster. At least I was raising him right.
He pushed the sleeves up to his elbows. It didn’t help. The jacket cocooned him. I batted his arm away before he dragged the sleeve through a line of toothpaste.
“The truth is, you look weird.” I finished shaving and rinsed the razor. “We just don’t talk about it.”
“Na-uh. You said I’m cuter than you.”
“I’m just sparing your feelings, little man.” I studied him and faked gagging. “Yep. You’re grotesque. Remember the Hunchback of Notre Dame?”
“Quizzytomato?”
“Yeah. That one. He’s got a better shot at the gypsy than you.”
“Okay, well…you’d only get the goat.”
“Anyone ever tell you that you’re a b-a-a-a-a-a-d boy, Bast?”
“It’s Sebastian.”
“Okay, Seba-a-a-a-a-a-stian.”
I hauled him off the sink and stole my suit jacket back. He followed me to the bedroom, jumping on my bed as I attempted to straighten my bow tie.
“Why are you wearing that?” he asked.
“Cause I was invited to our quarterback’s charity gala. Gotta dress up.”
“Why?”
Good question. “It’s a fancy party.”
“That stinks.”
“Nah. Wearing a tux impresses girls. They like it.”
“Ew. Why do you want to impress girls so much?”
“When you’re older, you’ll spend most of your day trying to impress a girl.”
“Not me.” He shook his head.
“Even you.”
“No way!” Sebastian jumped higher and nearly flew off the bed. I caught him before he impaled himself in my drywall. “When I’m older, girls are gonna impress me.”
Oh, the naivety of youth.
“You think that, little man, but trust me…” I fit the jacket over my shoulders and surveyed the damage in the mirror. At least it covered the bruises from training camp. I almost looked respectable. “One day you’re gonna find a girl you like, and you’ll turn into a complete idiot because of it.” I pointed at him. “So, for God’s sake, make sure she’s the perfect girl.”