Lachlan hadn’t moved. I groaned as the towel missed him, fluttered down, and tee-peed over his erection. The team collectively lost their shit, and the locker room echoed with laughter.
What were the chances I could melt into a puddle of my own humiliation and escape to a regular nightmare—the kind with monsters or missed math tests?
Cole swore. “I am not gonna be the one to tell Piper about this.”
That made two of us.
No one had to know. Not agents. Not the press. Not the coaches—
“What the fuck is going on here?”
Fuck. Too late for the coaches.
Coach Thompson pushed linebackers and receivers out of his path, shoving his way to Lachlan. Jack shouted and pulled me back before Thompson launched Lachlan into Cole’s locker.
“What the hell are you doing?” He pointed a thick finger at Lachlan’s head. “Don’t fucking tell me we’ve gotta another goddamned assault case to cover up?”
Another?
“Whoa!” Lachlan raised his hands. “No! It’s okay. I can explain!”
“You!” Coach Thompson turned to me, venom in his words. “Get the hell out of the locker room. Out of the goddamned facility! You’re—”
“Wait!” Lachlan stood as the team shouted. “I didn’t force myself on her! Honest to God.”
I found my voice, squeaking between my heart and stomach, both frantically attempting to escape my mouth.
“He didn’t,” I said. “It was an accident. I didn’t know he was showering too. I had to clean-up—”
“So you’re just fucking around, rookie?” Coach Thompson pitched him into the lockers again. “On my time? With our money?”
“No! Look. Three months ago at the scouting combine, Elle and I hooked up.”
This delighted the team. The applause and cheers were not helping.
“Lachlan!” I snapped. “That’s not going to help!”
The coach agreed with me. “And you think that makes this okay?”
“You don’t understand.” Lachlan gave me an apologetic shrug. “See…we’re kinda—”
“You’ve got three seconds before I cut your ass off this team—”
“We got married!”
Silence except for my panicked, enraged, utterly humiliated squeal.
I shoved away from Jack and nearly crashed Lachlan into the locker myself.
“Are you insane? What are you talking about? We absolutely did not get—”
The memory blitzed me from the blindside.
I gasped, hands over my mouth.
No, no, no.
It wasn’t possible. No one would let someone who had that many shots of every kind of alcohol into a wedding chapel.
We’d drank to get rid of the hangover. Fucked to work off the buzz. And then…
Oh no.
What he said rang a bell. Wedding bells.
Lachlan wrapped an arm over my shoulders and faced the team with a brilliant smile.
“I guess I should have told you guys,” he said. “Elle is my wife.”
4
Lachlan
Elle looked great when she was pissed.
That was good for me. I was pretty sure she planned to pluck off my balls, grate them into dust, and spoon feed the remains to me.
I didn’t have to knock on her door. Elle waited for me. Luckily, she didn’t answer armed…just dangerous.
I smiled anyway. “Hi, honey. I’m home.”
The door slammed shut.
So an afternoon at practice wasn’t enough time to start laughing about this. Good to know.
I knocked again. “Don’t put me in the doghouse already. We’re still newlyweds.”
She shouted through the door. “And we’re about to have our first domestic disturbance call.”
“As long as it gets me make-up sex…or am I supposed to sleep on the couch?”
Nothing. Not even a profanity.
I sighed. “Come on, Red. Lighten up.”
“Lighten up?”
The door opened, nearly torn off its hinges. Elle let me inside, but I couldn’t see if she hid a baseball bat anywhere.
“Lighten-up?” Elle’s growl was pretty convincing. “We’re married, Lachlan!”
“And I still owe you a ring.”
“You owe me an annulment!”
I pointed to the entryway. “At least let me carry you through the threshold first.”
“How ‘bout I just shove the bridal bouquet up your—”
“Whoa!” I wagged a finger at her pouted lip and that sassy hand on her hip. “Let’s save the rough stuff for the bedroom.”
She groaned. “When are you going to take this seriously?”
“As soon as you realize that this is pretty funny.”
Elle failed to see the humor.
To be fair, she’d had a rough day, but not all of it was bad. Sure, she got puked on. And, yes, everyone had seen her naked. But that only meant she was significantly more popular with the team now than she had ever been. And, as I was now associated with the most perfect set of tits on the team, I gained a shit-ton of respect with the guys.