Once Mated Twice Shy(25)

“I was playing hard to get.” Her eyes narrowed and Jordan’s mouth was crushing her lips a second later. Lettie melted into him. “I love you Lettie and I want to be with you.” He murmured against her mouth. She moaned. “I just needed for you to realize that you want it too.”

“You’re an ass Jordan Giroux.” Lettie smacked him when the kiss ended.

“I want you to be my mate Lettie, don’t ever doubt that.” Jordan lifted her and carried her to his bed. “You sleep here from now on.” She nodded. “I need you to forgive me and I need for you to mean it. Don’t just say the words. You have to let it all go. Every muddy boot print, the rape, the teasing, the bad feelings, everything that I did or caused that has poked holes in your soul Colette, I need you to forgive them.” She was sitting on the side o the bed and he was leaning over her with his hands braced on each side of her hips. “We need to be together because neither of us is safe or whole without the other and we both know it.” Lettie bit her lip. “This will go no further until you forgive me.” Jordan’s eyes were amber and intent on hers. She drew a ragged breath and nibbled her lip. “You have to say the words Lettie and then you have to let me mark you. We are not going to move forward until that happens too. I am sick and tired of being mated while I’m not mated. You are worth more than your weight in gold but not if you are available for other men. I want us to be a team, two halves of a whole and I want pups. I’m tired of playing house. I know we were young when we mated and maybe that was a mistake. Maybe we should have waited until we were old enough to act like grownups. I am a grownup now Lettie and I’ve decided on what I want. If you don’t want those things too then we will part ways. This is it. You choose. Will it be forever with me or forever without me?” She gulped. He was serious. His eyes were more intense than she’d ever seen them. Jordan was all-alpha right then and it was intoxicating. There was nothing in the world that she wanted more than to be his forever but could she let go of everything, of all of the pain. To belong to this Jordan, the one that was not a kid playing with his new toy, but the one that was ready to take on the responsibility of a mate. This was so hard. She wanted him, and she wanted to let it go but it was damned hard. She nodded. “I said you have to say the words Lettie!” His voice boomed in her ears and she trembled closing her eyes. Being with him was so important to her heart’s survival. He was right when he said that he was soulless and heartless without her, she was too. She’d felt nothing but emptiness since he’d walked out all of those nights ago. Lettie wanted so much to feel complete again, to feel loved again, and to look into this man’s eyes every day. This man was her other half. He was her soul mate. It sounded corny but he was and her soul knew it. Way back when he was fifty pounds lighter with half of the muscle that he had now. Way back when he was still trying to grow a mustache and trying to get into her pants. Her soul knew him, her wolf knew him, it wanted him, and it needed him. Her wolf needed Jordan. It was why they were inseparable when they were so young, why their hormones were crazy for each other, and why their parents gave in so quickly. Everyone knew it. It didn’t matter that they’d had a rough patch, the fights, the bad feelings, the tears, and the hate, none of it mattered. What mattered was that they would spend the rest of their lives together. They’d loved intensely, fought intensely, and made up just as intensely. She and Jordan did everything in epic proportions. Lettie took a long deep breath and let it all go. As misguided as it was, everything that Jordan did, he did for her, his mate. They say that the road to hell is paved with good intentions. They’d certainly walked that road and they’d been to hell, it was time to step back into what could be heaven.





Chapter Eight




Jordan blew out a breath when her eyes slipped closed and he stood. This was it. He’d bet it all on her and she couldn’t do it, she couldn’t forgive him. Fuck. God he’d been so stupid. His youth, the time he’d spent sniffing after her, the time he’d spent fighting with her and trying to alpha up, it was all wasted. He was never to mate and be happy. He would never have pups. Women were supposed to have ticking biological clocks but apparently, men could have them too. Jordan’s sounded like the big clock in England. His hands fisted at his sides and he turned to leave. He didn’t want to give up on her, not ever, but she was giving up on him. “I forgive you Jordan,” she whispered. “For all of it, for everything, I want you to mark me and I want to give you pups.” A slow lazy smile spread over his face. Lettie took her shirt off and pulled her hair out of the way. “Whenever you’re ready, I’m ready.” Her eyes were round and her breaths shallow remembering the rogues. His head shook. Her chin quivered. Was he toying with her again?