Obsession, Loving An Alpha Male(39)

“I remembered all the people I saw around Noah; politicians, police, and rich business men. I believed Noah would get away with anything I accused him of. And I knew for a fact my father would hate me forever if I ran to the police. So I told him I would behave. I told him I would keep my mouth shut but I secretly started to make plans. I knew we would go to my parents’ house for Sunday dinner. I knew the route Noah would take, because hell, that was the only way to get to my parents’ home. So I waited, and Noah actually left me alone for two days until it was time to leave. He brought me something to wear and warned me that there was no place I could hide from him. That he would find me, and it would be far worse for me than it already was.”

“God, the man that was before me sent chills through my body. He was night and day, one minute this guy could be charming and sweet then he could be vicious and evil with a fluid motion that astounded me. But I listened. I was good all the way up until he got to a place where I was familiar with. The moment he came to a stop I waited for my chance. The light we came to was known to be very long. When I was a kid, I used to calculate every time it would change, and it never changed over the years. It took at least four minutes, and luck was on my side that day. It changed the moment we got to it. So the last second before it changed to green, I quietly undid my buckle, not showing him it was undone, but I kept my hand on it. The moment he started to move through traffic I opened the door and rolled out. It was hectic. I made cars swerve to avoid hitting me, and I’m not sure if I caused an accident or not because I didn’t look back. Once I safely got to the sidewalk I ran as fast as I could.

I grew up in the neighborhood, and I knew where to hide where he couldn’t find me. I went directly to my favorite place as a kid… I went to the library.”

I smiled at the crazy look Josh gave me.

I added, “Yeah, I know I’m strange, but it’s something about the smell of old books, you know… Anyway, I hid out there for hours waiting to see if Noah followed me, if he sent the cops looking for me. It was that moment where I thought about telling my father what Noah was doing to me, but I remembered what my father told me a few months ago that had me pausing. ‘Being with Noah is the best decision you have ever made. I’m proud of you. You finally grew up. Don’t fuck this up for yourself but mainly don’t fuck this up for me. I’m finally getting the exposure for my company, and I don’t need you taking more money from me than you already have.’ I didn’t get that part considering I’ve made him more money than he ever could, but I didn’t argue. Now I’m at an impasse. Do I risk going to him anyway, hoping he couldn’t be that cruel, or do I tempt the hand of fate and try to make it on my own? As the hours went by and I wasn’t found, I decided fate it was. When I realized no one was coming, I found a computer and got a hold of the only person that could help me… Nickels.”

“Who?” he said simply, and I smiled.

I explained, “Nickels and I met in college. His dorm room was down the hall from Wayne’s, and I used to pass it all the time. Wayne told me to stay away from him, saying things like ‘that kid is fucking weird,’ but I didn’t listen. I felt we had a kindred spirit of some kind, both of us being so young, you know. Anyway, I would hang out with him and play video games sometimes. And when I would see him on campus, I would sit and talk to him. We became friends.” I laughed at a memory. “This one day walking by his room, I saw this video game he was playing on his TV. When I looked at the huge screen, he had on his wall I saw he had an avatar that looked exactly like me. He had a controller and glasses sitting next to him, so I walked in and we started playing. At first, we were bad guys, you know, robbing banks and fighting and killing cops, other gangs, just having a ball… Then, I told him let’s be good guys. And he created some program where we became agents.

Man, we were a pair and played like every day for hours sometimes. We still play to this day… Anyway, I found an open computer since that’s how we communicate with each other. He hates phones, thinking big brother is always listening, and to be honest, I believed him. So anytime we talked it was through something he could control…”

“The game…” Josh added. I nodded.

“Yup. I logged on and told him what was happening, and I asked him if he could help me. He didn’t hesitate. He told me to give him a few hours, and he’ll make it happen, but it took less than that. He sent me a message with instructions to go outside that there was a cab with a driver by the name of Scottie. Scottie would take me to a safe place where there would be everything I would need.”

“I left the library, hesitantly of course, but there was no one out there but a yellow cab. I peeked in and the driver already had his ID out ready for me. So knowing Nickels would have my back, I got in the cab. The cab took me to some apartment in town. Scottie, the driver, gave me a set of keys and told me which apartment to go to. When I walked in the apartment, there was a book bag waiting for me with two additional outfits, some money, ID, Social Security card with my new name, which by the way happened to be the name of my avatar he created. So I cut my hair, dyed it, and put the brown tinted color contacts on to match my ID.”

“I had a bus ticket waiting for me and a prepaid phone with a message that Nickels sent telling me he would have my back and make sure I was never found. And I left the apartment and left New Jersey, never looking back.”

Josh leaned into me and brushed his knuckles against my cheek and looked in my eyes with such intensity, I couldn’t hold his gaze.

Josh asked, “So this guy, Nickels, kept you under the radar all this time?”

“Yup,” I replied.

“And no one has ever tried to find you? I mean, did your family at least put out a missing person’s report?”

I sighed. “No, not really. You see, my first stop was Alabama, and I sent my mother a post card telling her I wasn’t coming back and that I was fine. I let her know I couldn’t take it anymore, and if no one was going to help me, I’ll help myself. That same day I left Alabama, and I kept moving for months before I figured I was safe enough to stay in one place longer than a few weeks.” I looked down at my lap. “I know I took the coward’s way out.”

“Hey, hold on a second.” Josh brought my chin up so our eyes could meet. Anger filled his eyes as he said, “Don’t you dare say that shit. Baby, what you did was one of the bravest things I have ever heard of.”

I scoffed and tried to move my chin from his grip, but he held on.

“Listen to me. The fact that you knew to make sure you didn’t stay in the same place long enough for someone to remember you is what a smart operative would do to survive. It’s textbook. You live modestly, and we both know you don’t have to. I know about your investments and the money you have hidden in a Swiss bank account, but you never touched it. You stay quiet and to yourself. You blend in with the shadows…”

“And you’re probably right, from what I could tell about Noah, he has connections. He would’ve twisted whatever you claimed into something far worse for you and your family. It’s fucked up you had no one to fall back on in your family, but you running was the safest thing you could have done for yourself, and in my opinion that was all that mattered.”

“Yeah, until I got here.” I shook my head, tears forming in my eyes. “I don’t know what it is about this city and this place, but I can’t seem to leave. I know I should. I know I should move on, but…”

“Sweets, you don’t have to run anymore… I promise you I’ll make this go away… as a matter of fact, you can best believe I’m going to handle this motherfucker myself.”

I gripped Josh’s arms tight. “No, please listen… Please promise me you won’t kill him.”

Josh shook his head. “That’s a promise I can’t make, Sweets.”

Josh stood, and I followed.

“No, listen please.” I moved to stop him from leaving my room. “Let’s get him another way, okay… I want him to pay for what he’s done, but I don’t want you to kill him… Promise me you won’t kill him, Josh.”

Josh and I stood staring at each other. I don’t know why I cared about Noah. I should have wanted Josh to make him pay for what he did to me. And honestly, to think that he may have done the same thing to someone else made me really feel like a coward, but for some reason I wanted him to be humiliated instead of killed. I wanted him to pay for the rest of his life, not get the easy way out.

I tried to reason with Josh again and told him why I didn’t want him to die. Finally, that seemed to work, and he smiled at me.

“All right, Sweets, I promise you I won’t kill him. Okay… but I won’t promise you that I won’t beat his ass… but I won’t kill him…”

I wrapped my arms around his neck.

“That, I can live with.”

“And you owe me a phone and I want a nice one too,” I added because, hell, it was true.

Josh just kissed my lips and said to me, “Of course, baby. Anything for you.”