“No. He's worse.” Brendan raised his head to look at me, anger hardened his gaze. “He came back.”
I looked away.
“Do you even know how many girls he slept with in high school? Because I do. Mal was a fun guy and a good friend for a while, but even I knew that he didn't give a fuck about women. They were just toys to him.”
Mal was with a lot of girls in high school and it made me crazy jealous. We never dated, though, so wasn't that okay? We only ever even kissed once and that was right before he left.
“I don't know what his game is, but I know he didn't come back for you. He's using you for...fuck I don't know. Maybe he just wants to fuck you because he never got the chance when we were younger.”
“How can you say that?” I shot back defiantly. Brendan was getting under my skin. It felt like the bad times again, just before dad died. Right before it became the worst times. “You haven't seen him in eight years. You don't know a thing about him now!”
“Do you?”
No. I really didn't...
Brendan's simple question robbed me of an answer. Mal was sweet and charismatic and obscenely hot, but we'd only spent a few hours together. How could you really know a person in that short of time? The wounded part of me that couldn't forget that pain chirped in the back of my head.
What if Mal was using me?
“I'm just worried about you. I love you, Sis. We've lost both our parents.” Brendan's tone lost its hostility. “I can't lose you too.”
It was hard to be mad at someone that was genuinely concerned for you. I just wish he could see Mal the way I saw him. There was goodness in him. I couldn't explain why or how I knew there was. I just knew. Maybe it was foolish, but I trusted him.
“I know. But you have to let me figure this out myself.”
“I don't trust him, Kait.” Brendan's voice deepened slightly and his gaze slipped past me as if he was peering into the past itself. After a moment his eyes snapped back to me. “Call him, see if he answers?” He shrugged. “Mal might have already abandoned you. Again.”
Blind trust. How could I offer that to Mal so freely? Was that how Dad felt about Tonya? The thought made me shiver.
“I gotta go.” Uncertainty crept into my heart. What if he didn't answer? “I'm late for work.”
Brendan nodded, knocked on the door of my car then backed away so I could leave.
When I got to Children's I immediately fished my phone out of my purse. I spent the next twenty minutes sitting in my car staring at the blinking text messaging cursor. Type message, read the text box beneath Mal's number.
Hey.
That was all I could come up with.
I stuffed the phone back into my purse; I really was late. I shuffled inside and made my apologies. As always they were completely understanding. I technically wasn't even scheduled to come in that day, but I promised a few of the kids that we could watch the movie together.
I loaded my two girls and three boys into the car and we set off. My job didn't pay a lot, but being able to see Ashley, Ben and the other ten year olds grow and learn was immensely rewarding. Spending the rest of the day with them made me want to have a family and kids of my own so badly.
Kids... I thought, idly checking my phone again for hundredth time. My priorities were so backwards. I sighed, seeing no reply. Mal was the only man I'd ever wanted any kind of real future with. That realization brought me so low.
“Are you okay, miss Kait?” Ashley asked as I dropped them all back off. I waved to the kid's parents who were waiting in idling cars nearby.
“Yeah, sweetie. It was just a really good movie.” I wiped my eyes, smiling at Ashley, then chuckled to hide the pain. “And sometimes good things make you cry.”
Ashley hugged me, then ran for her parents.
I stayed in my car for a while after the parents and staff had left, not knowing what to do with myself. I didn't want to go home and face the happily married couple. After about an hour, darkness had blanketed Springfield and I finally mustered up the courage to call Mal directly. Maybe for whatever reason his phone just didn't get text messages.
It went right to voice mail.
And then I started to sob.
Chapter 10
Malik
“Have a good night, Earl. Thanks again.” I closed the fire station door behind me.
It had been almost a week since I'd seen or talked to Kait and that silence was eating me alive. I still hadn't received my replacement phone from my shitty carrier in the mail, despite paying for overnight shipping.
I'd gone to the library every day to try to find contact information for her online. Neither of us had Facebook accounts, or if she did, it was hidden really well. She mentioned that she worked with autistic kids, but with so many schools and programs in Springfield alone, that didn't narrow it down much.