I nodded because it was the truth. “Yeah, she’s hot.”
“Let’s go then. You’ll thank me when she’s riding you to third base.”
“I’m busy.”
“There’s no such thing as busy when hot Brazilian chicks want to talk to you, asshole. Come on.”
“And say what?”
“Nothing. Anything. She won’t care.”
I went because I was admittedly intrigued, and the girl was extremely easy on the eyes. It wasn’t often I found a girl as uniquely attractive as Elise.
“Hey Tanya,” Javier said, smiling at her.
“Oh, hey,” she replied, pretending to be surprised. She hopped off the machine, looking right at me with chocolate brown eyes.
Javier nudged my shoulder. “Aston, this is my friend Tanya. She’s new.”
I nodded kindly. “Hey.”
Tanya grinned. She even managed to do that sensually. “Hi, it’s nice to meet you, Aston. We’re in the same history class.”
“Are we? I don’t pay attention in that class.”
She laughed. “Neither do I. Do you work out here all the time?”
“Every day.”
“Are you training for sports or something?”
“I don’t do sports.”
“He doesn’t compete with anyone but himself,” Javier explained. “Aston’s weird like that.”
Tanya bit her lip, and I closely watched the movement, sadly feeling absolutely nothing by it. “I don’t think that’s weird at all.”
“He helps out all the other guys too,” Javier said, doing everything in his power to score me this girl. “He’s like a trainer.”
“Can you help me out?” she asked me, her eyes moving to my arms. “I don’t know how to do weights.”
That was bullshit. She knew it. We knew it. I was supposed to go along with it, though. I was supposed to lead her to a weight rack and tell her how to squat with my hands on her waist, hips, ass, wherever. It was meant to be some kind of erotic moment that led to her getting fucked in the nearest bathroom stall. It wasn’t the first time I’d seen this kind of action.
The offer was there, and it shone from her eyes, begging me to take it.
For a few brief moments, I wondered what that would be like. Touching her, running my hand through her thick dark hair, squeezing her hips as I lifted her tiny body against me. It was an exciting thought. It made my blood run faster as I thought of how easy it would be to finally feel how warm the body of a woman was.
But…then again, I’d rather fuck my math textbook. I’d get more connection out of it than a throwaway fuck, and besides…the only girl that ran through my head when I had sexual fantasies had blonde hair and blue eyes.
It was very disappointing. I didn’t want to focus all my sexual energy on a girl I couldn’t have. If it were up to me, I wanted to imagine myself with other girls and move on from my obsession. But it just wasn’t happening.
That was the curse of addiction: it had your focus narrowed on one particular thing, and nothing else came close to it.
I tore my eyes away from Tanya and glanced down at my watch. “Can’t stick around. I have to pick up Elise from dance class.”
Javier’s eyes widened and he gave me a scolding look. “Well…how about I pick her up and you can get to know Tanya a bit? Help her lift some things and make sure her form is nice and…tight.”
I shook my head. “I haven’t seen Elise in three hours and forty-two minutes. I can’t wait another hour.”
“Is she your girlfriend?” Tanya asked, masking her disappointment.
“His sister,” Javier answered for me, frowning at my lack of interest.
“Oh…is she young? Is that why you have to pick her up from dance class?”
“She’s seventeen,” I responded. “Her feet get sore after class, and I don’t want her to walk home in pain.”
“Oh…”
Javier appeared annoyed. “I just told you I’d pick her up. I wouldn’t make her walk home, man.”
I narrowed my eyes at him. “She doesn’t like you.”
“What? Why the hell not?”
“Because you flirt with her.” He did it all the time. He was so horribly obvious, I wanted to rip his lungs from his throat any time he was around her.
Javier rolled his eyes. “Whatever, man.”
I looked at them both and backed away. “Sorry guys. I’ll see you around. It was nice to meet you, Tanya.” When I smiled kindly at her, she let out an unsteady breath and her cheeks went pink.
Fuck, I wished I felt something.
I wished, most of all, that I was normal.