She stroked his hair and leaned closer. “Oh baby. I’m so sorry.” Tears shimmered in her eyes.
“I know you can never say the same to me since you had a very close bond with your mate, but I hope that one day you will look at me and not wish it was him holding you instead.”
“You’re breaking my heart,” she whispered. “Stop. Never say that again. That’s not true. I have never wished he was here instead of you. Not once. You’re Mourn. You’re sweet and kind. You’re the sexiest man I’ve ever met. There’s no comparison. You make me happy and you make me feel alive. That’s your doing. Do you understand?”
Her words helped, but they were being honest. “He was a good mate, and you had no lack of anything with him.”
She shook her head. “I wouldn’t say that. I mean, he was good to me, but we had problems too, Mourn. Everyone does in a relationship.”
“You’re saying that to make me feel better.”
“No. I’m not.” She released his hair and put her hand back on his shoulder, holding his gaze. “Do you want to hear some of my marital problems?”
“You had some?”
“Everyone does.” She paused. “Tommy always had to have things his way. He wasn’t pushy or mean about it, but don’t think he wouldn’t use humor and a lot of cajoling to get me to agree to whatever he wanted. He insisted I be at his side at the company he ran, despite knowing I didn’t want to work there. I had to put my career on hold. I resented it some, because I was always the one to bend and give in to what he wanted. He also liked to impress people and was very social. I didn’t care what everyone thought, and I’m not outgoing. We sometimes had arguments about that. He’d just smile and tell me how much he loved me, and that I’d make him happy if I tried a little harder to fit into the lifestyle he wanted. Sometimes that hurt me. Why didn’t my happiness matter? I was downright miserable at times, but I had to smile and bear it because it was important to him. He figured if it was important to him, it had to be important to me too. That never went both ways though. I was aware of it, but I wanted our marriage to work.”
“Did he ever abuse you, Dana?”
“No. Tommy wasn’t like that. He never would have hit me, or anything along those lines. He was just kind of selfish about certain things. He would actually make jokes about it, and he could be very charming to get me to stop being upset with him. Sometimes I resented that too. All his snobby friends ditched him as soon as they realized he wasn’t going to beat the cancer the second time. I felt bad for him, Mourn. In the end he finally realized what was really important. That was us spending time together. He tried hard to make it up to me.”
He stroked her back, wanting to comfort her. “At least he was human. I’m not. Does that bother you? You’d have to give up the world you live in to be with me. I’m asking too much and being selfish, aren’t I?”
“No.” She shook her head and smiled. “That’s not being selfish. That’s a necessity, and it’s beyond your control, Mourn. You can’t exactly move into my house. Not to mention, I really enjoyed what we just did. You being New Species made mind-blowing oral sex happen, and did I tell you that you have the best body I’ve ever seen? You’re beautiful in every sense of the word.”
He chuckled, his mood lightening. “You like the purring.”
“I do.”
“I love your taste.” He glanced down at her thighs, which were spread over his lap, and reached to stroke her pussy with his finger. He looked up, watching her face. “I’m grateful you enjoy my touch.”She bit her lower lip and her eyes narrowed. A soft moan came from her and he suddenly flipped her over onto her back. He spread her thighs and slid down her. She liked his mouth, and he planned to show her how being his mate had its advantages.
“I could do this to you for hours.” He used his tongue to play with her clit.
“Mourn,” she rasped.
She was his female. He purred deeply and gripped her thighs to hold them open when she started to rock her hips against his mouth. He had her for the night, and he planned to make it a memorable one.
Chapter Nine
Dana entered Paul’s house, hoping he’d already left for work. She wasn’t that lucky. He sat at the island on a barstool with his laptop open in front of him and a cup of coffee in hand. He turned his head and looked at her, and then at the clock on the wall. His mouth tightened into a grim line as he glared at her.
“I probably should have called last night to say I was spending the night at Mourn’s, but you knew where I was so you shouldn’t have worried.” She closed the door. “Where is Becky?”
“At the women’s dorm. They are watching movies this morning. She would have taken you with her to meet everyone, but someone didn’t come home last night.”
Dana entered the kitchen and poured herself a cup of coffee. She took the time to add creamer before she faced him. “Mourn told me you had a talk with him. Really, Paul? I’m an adult.”
“I don’t want you anywhere near him.”
“At least he’s not like that base tramp you brought to my wedding and dated for six months. How many of your service buddies had she slept with before she sank her hooks into you? She was looking for a soldier to marry. Any soldier. Didn’t they warn you about those kinds of women when you signed up?”
“I wasn’t going to marry her. I made that clear. That has nothing to do with this.”
“It does. I didn’t ride your ass for dating her or threaten her about what I’d do to her if she hurt you. You were an adult and knew her history. I gave you enough credit to be too smart to fall into that honey trap. Mourn actually cares about me.”
Paul cursed. “I knew he’d tell you that I threatened him.”
That pissed her off. “Actually, he didn’t. I was just using that as an example of what I wanted to do to that woman but I resisted. You threatened him? Paul!” She glared at him.
He shrugged. “I’m trying to protect you.”
She sipped her coffee so she wouldn’t round the island and punch him. It was tempting. She set the mug down on the counter and took a few calming breaths. “I don’t need you to do that. I appreciate it, but stay out of this.”
He slid off the barstool. “I’m worried about you.”
“I get that. It’s why I haven’t smacked you. I can’t believe you threatened him.”
“I had to talk to him about something important. You don’t understand.”
“You mean about using condoms so I don’t get pregnant?”
His jaw dropped.
“He told me the truth. I won’t repeat it, and only brought it up because we’re alone in the house. Mourn is a good guy, Paul. I know what I’m getting into with him. I’ll say it again. I feel things for him, and I want to see if our relationship can work. Cut me some slack. I get enough shit from our mother. I don’t need you trying to run my life too.”
Paul seemed to recover. “I can’t believe he told you about the babies. It’s classified.”
“He trusts me. I wish you would.”
“I couldn’t tell you. I swore an oath of secrecy, Dana.”
“I’m not talking about NSO classified information. I wish you’d trust my judgment. I’m falling in love with Mourn. I know more about his past than you do. He didn’t have anyone he could talk to and open up with. Now he does. He was self-destructive, but not anymore. I understand exactly what he’s going through, and guess what? We’re good for each other.”
“You deserve someone who is going to love you first and foremost. He had a mate.” Paul lifted his hand and scrubbed it over the back of his head. “They aren’t like married people. I don’t know how to get my point across, but I’m terrified you’re going to be unhappy in the long run.” He dropped his hand to his side. “I don’t want him to break your heart because he expects you to fill a dead woman’s shoes.”
She sighed, all her anger gone. “I had the same fears, but guess what?”
Paul waited, watching her.
“We both discovered that our marriages weren’t all that perfect, okay? He told me about his problems with his mate, and I told him about my issues with Tommy. Neither of us wants to duplicate that. We both want better than what we had.”
He frowned. “What? But they were mated. I’ve never seen an unhappy mated pair.”
“Were you around 139 and Mourn?”
“Not much. They were moved into couples housing after they were freed. We wanted 139 to be more comfortable in a home setting instead of having to live at Medical. Destiny was the nurse assigned to check in on her since she wasn’t comfortable with me, because I’m human.”
“They weren’t that happy,” she confessed. “I’m not going to give you details, but I’ll say that much so you’ll back off.”
“What problems did you have with Tommy?”
She sipped her coffee. “It wasn’t all roses, okay? We had rough patches.”
“You never told me that. You always seemed so happy.”
“Do you call me to bitch about something Becky has done to piss you off or hurt your feelings?”