Nowhere to Hide(100)
As she eased away slightly, her heart beating double time, he loosened his grip on her shoulder, allowing her to lean against him. Lia reached out, tenderly touching his flushed face, feeling the intensity of his need.
“You’ve been so patient,” she whispered unsteadily. “Thank you for giving me the time…the space, Cav. I know I’ve tied you in knots. I know how much you want to love me.”
She allowed her hand to rest against his powerful chest, feeling the thud of his heart beneath her palm. “I’m ready now. I’m scared, but I’m ready because I’m falling in love with you…”
She saw his eyes widen with surprise, and then relief.
“I’ve been falling in love with you from the day I met you,” he admitted hoarsely.
“Really?”
“Yes, really.”
Lia laughed awkwardly, allowing her hands to rest on his chest, loving this connection with Cav, his large hands so warm and comforting to her now. “You know, looking back on it,” she admitted, “The moment I saw you I was so drawn to you, Cav. It scared me to death. I’d never been attracted to a man like that. Not ever.”
He released her, enclosing her hands with his own. “You’ve been on one hell of a journey with me, Lia. I know we haven’t had a lot of quality time together. But look where we are now.”
“I know,” she said, holding his soft gaze. “And these last few months together have helped me so much, shown me so much about myself, and about you.”
“I was hoping it would.” He placed his hand over hers.
She looked down at their hands for a moment, and then began to tell him about her talk with Dilara on the porch swing. When she finished, she added, “I remember you saying how much Chief Jacoby helped you, showed you that a family could be a happy, healthy thing in your life. Dilara did the same with me, only it was about the wounds, the scars we all carry.”
Silently, Cav blessed Dilara. “How did it help you, Lia?”
She took a ragged breath and whispered, “I’m ready to make love with you, Cav. I’ve been wanting to for the longest time, but I was so scared.”
He nodded, his hands grasping hers tightly. “I kind of figured that. The more I got to know you, the more I realized you were still battling the trauma from five years ago.”
She squeezed his hand to let him know how much she appreciated his patience. “But instead of pushing or crowding me, you stepped back and gave me the room I needed to figure it all out. I’ve never met a man like you, Cav. You gave me permission to honestly relax in your presence, to take things as they naturally unfolded between us.”
He shook his head. “You’re worth any kind of wait, Lia. I’m not going anywhere, and I’m fine giving you whatever it is that you need. Because…”
Because he loved her. It was there, hanging gently suspended between them. Lia felt her heart wrench. “You had so much more to overcome than I ever did, Cav. I see that now. And you’re a powerful role model for me to get over this wound that’s kept me from ever wanting to reach out to someone again…”
Pushing a few curled strands away from her temple, she whispered, “I want to go home with you, but I’ll need your help, Cav.” She touched her belly region, placing her hand over it. “My worst scar…the one that Manuel freaked out on…is right here.” She felt her fear rising again anxious that he would be disgusted once he saw it.
“Then,” he said evenly, his gaze steady, “I’ll let you show it to me when you’re ready. I know this is hard for you, Lia. And honestly, I don’t care what it looks like. It’s part of someone I care for, so it’s all beautiful to me.”
She felt tears rush to her eyes. Cav was utterly sincere, his hands warm and firm around hers. “I-I know that. I mean, my head knows it.”
“I can feel you already starting to close up on me, Lia,” he said quietly. “And you don’t need to. You know that now. I don’t pay any attention to your other scars. Does it make me angry that you were hurt like this? Hell, yes. But I’m not going to let those wounds keep me from you.”
He released her hand and gently brushed his fingers between her breasts. “It’s your heart that I love. And your heart is you. That’s all that matters to me.”
Relief sped through her and she released a rough breath. “You’ve told me that before. And I know you’re being honest. I just have to get Manuel’s reactions out of my way.”
“Well,” Cav said, amused, “I believe it’s time he stopped standing between us. How much power are you giving this guy, Lia? Isn’t what we’ve shared so far miles away from what you had with him? I’ve watched you grow, opening and trusting me more and more over time. That tells me that what we have is solid. Special. We do trust one another. I know you see that.”