Not Another Bad Boy(7)

"Parker, I'm so sorry. Are you okay?"

Jumping away and screaming is not exactly how I wanted to get back in  touch with Tom. I want to yell at him, but even in my panic, I realize  he didn't do anything wrong.

"Shit, dude. You scared the hell out of me. I'm fine. More scared than damaged. Well, by the coffee at least."

"Oh, thank God. I thought we were going to need to rush you to the hospital."

"Nope. I'm good."

It's true. I am good now that I am standing next to Tom again. This is  where I need to be. The confusion and pain of the past days washes away.  Somehow, it gets replaced with an awkward silence instead of the hugs  and kisses that I hoped for.

"So, um," Tom runs his hand through his hair. "You look good."

Tom is wearing a bright red cardigan which makes me smile. The dorky sweater isn't nearly as dorky when he's wearing it.

"You look good, too. That's a new one, right?" I ask while taking the  opportunity to run the back of my hand across it. "Mmm. Very soft."

Tom blows out a large gust of air.

"We really need to talk, you know. We can't just fall back into the routine without airing out whatever is going on here."

I laugh. Tom frowns and turns to walk away.

"Hold on, Tom." I grab his hand and pull him back. "I'm not laughing at you. I'm agreeing with you."

I show him my unsent text.

"I'm just nervous because I just can't screw this up. I need you too much. We have...."

Tom cups my cheek and kisses me hungrily on the lips, silencing my rambling.

When he breaks away, he says, "I need you, too. We'll figure this out,  but that starts with you being able to talk to me. As much as I want to,  I can't read your mind. What am I not giving you? Tell me. I may not be  able to give it to you perfectly right away, but I will work like hell  to do it as well as I can."

This is the moment. I open my mouth, but no words come out.

"Fuck," I say under my breath. "Why is this so hard?"

"Let's walk. Maybe that will help."

Tom grabs my hand. We walk about a block in silence. I barely notice the  flowers, fruits and necklaces that I normally love to gawk at. Thoughts  are flying through my head so quickly that I can barely acknowledge  them before they are gone. The only thing that sticks is, I need this  man.

With each passing step in silence, I am further convinced that I am  going to screw this up. I am going to lose Tom with my silence. It will  be even worse if I open my mouth and tell him what I want him to do to  me. He'll know what kind of kinks and desires I'm too afraid to admit,  and I'll still lose him.







I need a bad boy, but I not able tell the man that I love that I need him to be my bad boy. I just need him to be a bad boy.

Tom stops. "Enough. Shit or get off the pot. Open your goddamn mouth and talk."

His words jar me. Tom doesn't talk like that. The rough words reach deep  down into me, touching things that I haven't felt since we've been  together.

With my eyes closed, I manage to say, "I need you to be firmer in bed.  Rougher. I need you to talk dirtier." The words start to pour. "I need  you to be more aggressive in public. I need you to demand, push me into  position, pull my hair and...."

I open my eyes to see his reaction. He hasn't run away. I blush, realizing what I've just said.

"And what, Parker?"

"Well, I guess that's mostly it. I was way too wild before we met. I  didn't know what love was. I just fucked. Part of that scene is raw and  rough and dangerous, to be honest. I don't want the danger anymore, but I  miss the thrill. Have you ever fucked in an alley and had to stop in  the middle so passing cops didn't notice you, and then started up again  as soon as they were gone, practically daring them to come back?"

Tom's face finally went pale.

"Sorry. That's too much."

"No." He shook his head emphatically. "Nothing is too much. You can tell  me anything. I don't know if I'm up to that quite yet, but I guess I  can see the appeal. I can try to meet those needs as long as you work to  help me understand how to do it."

Goosebumps erupt on my arms. Tom has heard my basest desires and barely flinched.

Tom frowns. "But, that's not going to quite work, is it?"

My goosebumps turn into cold chills that dance down my back. It was too  much for him. This is where he runs away. He will break me when he  leaves.

"It won't work if you have to tell me what to do and then I do it. You  need me to just tell you to do wild things, right? That's the thrill?  Being at the mercy of someone else's whims. Someone who knows you so  well that he can take care of his own needs and your own at the same  time?"

I nod. "That's definitely a big part of it. I want to know I'm making you happy which will make me happy."

Tom frowns. "That's going to take some getting used to. We'll work toward it, okay?"

My heart skips a beat. I stare with my mouth open.

He pushes me against the side of one of the vendor stands. His hands on  my chest pin me against the wall. His lips suck on my neck. The hippie  selling free-trade sweaters at the stand gives us the thumbs up while  wandering over to an old lady feeling one of the sweaters. She and her  friend are staring right at us.

"Tom, maybe we should go...."

"Right here, Parker. I want to kiss you right here."

My erection strains for freedom against my jeans. Parker's lips move to  my mouth. I forget about the old ladies. They'll survive. I'm not sure  if I will.

Tom's hands are everywhere. One is teasing my nipples, making me very  happy to not be wearing a shirt. The other feels my bulge and then dives  inside my pants to wrap around my dick.

"Tom, too much. I mean this is perfect, but too much. I'm not going to last much...."

Then his hands and mouth are gone. A smile covers his face.

"That was fun. I think I could get used to this. Let's go home. I've got some plans."

Holding hands, we run through the farmer's market and back to our apartment. I don't want to ever let go of that hand again.





Chapter 14





I can tell things are going to be different when Tom kicks his shoes off  and just leaves them where they fall in the living room instead of  lining them up just right in the entry closet.

Tom pins me against the front door so he can kiss me again. I can get  used to him pinning me against things, his body telling me that I can  leave when he says he's done with me.

My hands grab the hair on the back of his head. I don't ever want to let  him out of my grasp. I just want to hold onto him until we get into the  bedroom.

Tom has different ideas though.

He spins me around. My face presses against the small glass window on  the top of door. A neighbor passes on the sidewalk out front walking his  dog while Tom reaches around my waist, unzips my pants and pulls them  and my underwear down to my knees.

I know the the dog walker can only see my face if he bothers to look,  but I feel completely exposed anyway. Finally, Tom is pushing buttons  the way that I have always craved that he would.

"Oh, is that for me?" he asks wrapping his hand around my dick.

"Yes, sir."

"Sir," he says with a laugh. "You're not going to call me sir."

Shit. I knew this was too good to be true.

I bend to pull up my pants.

And then it hits me. Literally. Tom's hand smacks my bare ass, making me fall forward against the door.







Stunned, I try to grab my pants again.

Tom's hand is too fast and too strong. Another smack to my ass freezes me, making me moan.

"You like that? Is that what you've been needing?"

"Yes, sir."

I need this and so much more but it definitely seems like we are on the right path.

With the third spanking, I flinch at the pain. My butt cheek is already  starting to heat up. I am sure Tom is getting a great view of his  handprint turning bright red on my pale skin.

"Not sir," he says again. "Something different. Master? No. My Lord?  Yuck, not that either. How about Boss? You'll call me Boss tonight and  I'll decide if I like that."

I swallow. Tom is taking control of me, but tailoring it for his own  preferences. He isn't doing this to fulfill my fantasy. He's making me  do this to fulfill his fantasy, and that is really what my fantasy has  been all along. I need a strong, confident man to take charge, spank me  when needed, and take what he needs.

"I'm going to give you ten for holding back on me for all these months.  Back up, lean forward, and press your hands against the door."

In this position, I'm even more on display, despite barely being able to open my legs because of the pants.

Tom surprises me by not spanking me first, though. Instead, his thumb  presses against my asshole, drawing a little circle that makes my knees  turn to jelly and my dick twitch.

If only we had some lube handy, I'm sure Tom would push his thumb into me. Maybe he'll rush to the bedroom.

Tom doesn't go anywhere, and he doesn't leave my asshole alone. Instead,  he pushes into me and then it is gone before I can adjust, relax, or  even tell whether it hurt or not. The surprise at his boldness forces my  head to turn and look at him.