She’d died of natural causes. Her grandpa had been wrong after all—there was no story here.
Why didn’t it hurt any less?
She shifted on the bleachers as more students told stories about Jemma from the lily-decorated podium. Even the Anderson family braved the stage, their faces splotchy, wiping away tears. Meredith reached for a Kleenex when Jill adjusted the microphone and told a story of them as kids. She’d chosen one that also showcased Brian and Pete—a nice touch, Meredith thought.
“She was fearless,” Jill finished, looking unfamiliar in a black dress with none of her usual colorful accessories. “And so full of life. I’ll miss you.” She stumbled coming down the dais, and both Pete and Brian jumped from their chairs to help. It broke Meredith’s heart. The bond between them might be frayed, but it wasn’t gone.
Jill darted back and pressed her face into their mother’s neck, crying softly.
Meredith studied Brian for a moment. She hadn’t seen him at all over the past few days. No one seemed to know where he’d gone. His face looked green under the fluorescent lights.
Her eyes flitted past the middle section of the crowd and met Tanner’s gaze. Her mouth turned up slightly in a poor attempt at a smile. He tilted his head to the side like he was studying her. God, he looked handsome in a simple white shirt and black blazer. They stared at each other until her neck developed a crick. She rubbed it and looked away, her heart pounding in her ears.
The pallbearers carried Jemma’s coffin out of the arena, their college bodies hunched over from grief. The Hales shuffled out.
Jill scanned the crowd. “Brian!” she called out, and took off at a run.
Grandpa Hale nudged Meredith. “Best go after her. She’ll need you.”
Nodding, she kissed his cheek and followed her sister. Brian was heading for the rear exit like his tail was on fire, but Jill increased her speed. So did Meredith. She wasn’t sure if she should follow, but she couldn’t bear for them to have another fight. Not now.
Jill made it to the side door and pushed the heavy frame open. “Brian! Dammit. Stop!”
He finally turned to face her.
Jill slowed. She was breathing hard. “I’ve been…calling you…for five days. Why haven’t you…called me back?”
His face held a tinge of yellow, and even from this distance, his eyes looked puffy and bloodshot. “I wanted to be left alone.” He unbuttoned his navy blazer and rested his hands on his hips. “Why are you suddenly so eager to call me anyway? Fucking-A, Jill.”
She marched forward and drilled her finger into his chest. “Don’t you dare ‘fucking-A’ me! I was worried about you.”
He scoffed.
Meredith edged a bit closer.
“Just leave me the fuck alone.”
“No,” she said shoving her hands against his chest.
He grabbed them.
Meredith strode forward. “Stop it. Both of you.”
They turned to face her, and Brian dropped Jill’s hands. “You keep her away from me, Meredith. I can’t take it right now. Neither can Pete.”
Jill flinched. “Like he fucking cares. He dumped her.”
“He cares! He’s suffering just like the rest of us. But I’m not going to argue with you. I just can’t…not right now, Red.”
Brian jogged off. Jill’s shoulders slumped.
“Come here, Jillie Bean,” Meredith said, pulling her in for a hug.
Jill clung to her like a monkey. “It’s never going to be all right again!” she sobbed.
Meredith gripped her sister harder, knowing how shitty it was to tell anyone time healed all wounds. Blah, blah, blah. She’d hated it when people told her that after her divorce.
“Everything okay?” she heard Tanner ask from behind them. She swiveled a bit to look at him, releasing Jill. He had his hands on his hips, his gaze understanding. “Come on. Let’s get the two of you a cup of tea. Then we’ll go to the gravesite.”
Jill bit her lip. “I don’t want to go. I don’t want to see them put her in the ground.”
“I know you don’t,” Tanner said, gently resting a hand on her shoulder, “but she’s not there anymore. You remember that.” He pulled her against his chest. “You go for her family. And because you’re still here.”
He rubbed her back like she was a little child, and she started crying again. How many people had cried in his arms during a war? He seemed to know exactly what to do, what to say.
Meredith’s heart tingled, like it had gone numb and was coming alive again. It…hurt. Seeing him comfort her sister like that had her defenses cracking like a hand through a window. He seemed like someone she could trust. She gripped her charcoal bustier under her black dress.