No Rules(109)
She smiled and waved good-bye as she got into the chauffeured limo. Then cried quietly all the way to the airport.
Chapter Nineteen
Two Months Later
Donovan slouched in the big swivel chair in Omega’s library, staring out the window at the thin ground cover of snow dotted with large patches of brown grass. Stupid excuse for winter. You couldn’t depend on snow in the Midwest, even in January. It should be five below with blizzard conditions, to match his mood.
Or else summer, to cheer him up. With bright sun and cloudless skies. Palm trees, too. There were palm trees in Luxor.
He groaned, disgusted with himself for letting his mind go there yet again.
“Hey, you okay?”
He turned away from the window. Avery stood in the center of the room, her brows knit with concern. Everyone had been solicitous with him since his return from Bolivia. Maybe too solicitous. He didn’t need to be pampered. “I’m fine. My leg’s fine. Doc wouldn’t have let me out if they hadn’t gotten the infection under control. Don’t worry about me.”
She nodded. “So you’re fine.”
“Like I said. But thanks for asking.”
She didn’t go away. Leave me alone, he thought, mentally projecting the idea. He waited impatiently, trying to look relaxed and fine, but wasn’t sure if he succeeded because he couldn’t remember what fine felt like.
Instead of leaving, Avery walked toward him. Ah, hell.
Surprising him, she put her hands on the arms of his chair, holding it steady as she crouched in front of him. “Tyler, can I say something to you as a friend?”
He shrugged. “Sure.”
“You’re an idiot.”
“Gee, I’m fond of you, too,” he said drily.
“Go see her. Tell her how you feel.”
He frowned. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Yes, you do, and don’t play dumb with me. I work with a bunch of macho guys so I try not to do the sensitive-girl stuff very often, but I’m making an exception for you ’cause you’re pissing me off. I’m talking about emotions, Tyler, and you’re going to listen because I’m sick of seeing you grumpy and sullen when you could be happy.”
“I’m happy.”
“You’re miserable.”
“Thanks for letting me know. I have a right, you know. I had an open wound and a raging infection that nearly cost me my leg.”
“I know, and I’m glad you’re better, but you were miserable before that, and that’s not why you’re still miserable. You need to see Jess, Tyler. You need to tell her how you feel.”
He narrowed his eyes. “You don’t know anything about it. Stay out of it.”
“I have been staying out, but you’re my friend, and I don’t like seeing my friend eating his heart out day after day because he’s so goddamned, motherfucking stubborn.”
He gave her a crooked smile. “Loosin’ that girl thing, there.”
“You’ve all been a bad influence. Don’t change the subject. You have to tell Jess you love her. If she doesn’t say she loves you back, I’ll eat my ammo belt, but if she doesn’t, at least you can start to move on.”
He didn’t know how she knew, and he wanted to deny it, but he couldn’t say it out loud. Couldn’t say he didn’t love Jess when he loved her so much it hurt. It hurt worse than having a gunshot wound with a staph infection in the middle of a sweltering jungle. He closed his eyes and sighed with defeat.
“Avery, Jess is Wally’s daughter, and you know what Wally said. A person in our line of work can’t afford to have a family. The emotional entanglements will trip him up, and he’ll end up hurting them all because he can’t be the husband and father they need him to be.”
“And how’s that working for you? Seems to me you’re pretty tripped up by emotional entanglements anyway. And you’re both hurting.”
“Wally said—”
“Wally’s not here.” She cut him off curtly, maybe to get the shocked look of attention he gave her. “Wally’s not you. I loved the man to pieces, but he had a hard time separating his emotions from his work, and that’s kind of necessary in our business. Also, he had a wife who was emotionally fragile and more than a little crazy. I only knew Jess a week, but she doesn’t seem fragile to me.”
“She’s not. She’s as strong and brave as you are. Maybe more.”
Avery smiled. “Is that so?”
“Damn right. Pretty determined about getting what she wants, too.”
“Really. Then why not let her make up her own mind about what kind of life she wants and who she loves?”