"A much harder way to know then."
"I... yes, I guess it would be."
"So has she never trusted you? Or was it lost by your words?"
"She trusted me to cleanse her, to feed her, and to sleep in my arms," Nikhil told him quietly. "It was only this morning that I broke that trust."
"I do not know this female, Nikhil. I do not know if she is worthy of you, but...”
"She is!" Nikhil instantly defended her. "She is the worthiest female I have ever known. She is strong and kind. She cares about others and defended me, even after I failed her."
"So you love her."
"I... Yes... I do... and not because she wears my bead."
"Of course not. What I was going to say is that for us the beads are never wrong. You have found your True Mate, Nikhil. So now it is up to you to show her that you are hers."
"I... how do I do that, Manno?"
"By always telling her truth, my male. By making sure she knows your true feelings and that they are all for her," Cirrus paused. "Your mother may not wear my True Mate bead, but I love her, and in my heart she is my True Mate.
∞ ∞ ∞ ∞ ∞
Mac hadn't meant to eavesdrop on Nikhil's conversation with his manno, but she hadn't known how to tell him she was awake. Then after a little while, she hadn't wanted to. She learned more about Nikhil and his real feelings for her in that short conversation than he had told her in the hours they had been together. Nikhil seemed to be a lot like her grandpa. A big, gruff male that had a hard time expressing his real feelings, but that would change. She would make sure it did.
"Nikhil?" she called out as he disconnected from his manno.
"Mackenzie?" He was immediately at her side. "I thought you were resting. Why aren't you resting? You need to rest."
"Would you mind if I rested in your bed?"
"I... no, I wouldn't."
"Would you help me get there?" she asked holding out her hands.
Taking them, Nikhil carefully pulled her to her feet. "Do you need Luol, Mackenzie?"
"No, I just need you to take me to bed."
Nikhil said nothing, just stared at her for a moment. There was no way she could have meant those words the way they sounded.
"Then that's where I will take you, Little One." Scooping her up into his arms, Nikhil carried her into his resting area. Once inside, he ripped back the covers and gently laid her down. "You are safe here, Mackenzie."
"I know." She moved over on the bed, then lying on her side, patted the spot next to her. "Lie with me, Nikhil."
"I thought...”
"Thought what?"
"That you didn't feel safe with me."
"You know better than that," she softly reprimanded. "I've never felt safer in my life than when I'm with you."
"Then why...”
"Get into bed, Nikhil, and maybe we can figure it out."
Nikhil quickly kicked off his boots, then lost his vest and weapons before joining her on the bed.
"I'm not sure where to touch you," she whispered.
"Touch me anywhere you want, Mackenzie, and I will respond."
"Maybe that's what I'm afraid of. How you will respond."
"Why?"
"You didn't respond well the last time."
"Mackenzie." Stretching out on his side, Nikhil braced himself up on an elbow, his head propped up on one hand while his other reached out to tuck a strand of hair behind her ear, remaining there to caress the soft skin of her neck. "You were right with what you said before. We are different, very different, and have a great deal to learn about each other. I had no right to react the way I did, to judge you by my people's customs without considering what yours might be. I would very much like to learn what those customs are, and then maybe between us we can find a way to create our own customs."
"Do you think that is possible?" she asked reaching out to touch his cheek.
"I think, that with you, anything is possible."
"What about the men I've kissed?" She felt him stiffen and started to pull her hand away, when the hand covering hers, stopped her.
"Kissing is different for your people," he said quietly.
"Yes, it is."
"Will you explain to me what it means to you?" he asked.
"Kissing?"
"Yes."
"Well, there are different kinds of kisses, and they mean different things depending on who is giving it and to whom."
"All on the lips?"
"No. You can kiss someone on the cheek, the forehead. Some males even kiss the back of a female's hand or palm. They all mean different things."
"The back of the hand...” Nikhil brought her hand to his lips. "Like this?"