"I didn't!"
"You did, Nikhil. You judged me, and found me unworthy." She felt her eyes fill. "And that is more painful than anything the Zaludians did." Finding she could no longer look at him, could no longer take seeing the pain her words caused him, she curled up into a ball and laid her head down on the arm of the couch. It was more comfortable than the mine floor, and it only took seconds for her to fall asleep.
Nikhil stood in a corner of the room he'd darkened and watched his True Mate sleep. He was at a loss at what to do to fix this. He would rather be fighting hand-to-hand with the Radek, with the Ganglian, the Zaludian, or the Tornians than to be standing here not knowing what to do. Mackenzie wasn't wrong. He had judged her. Doing what he'd vowed he'd never do.
Moving to her, he reached down, rolling her True Mate bead between his fingers. It didn't radiate the warmth that it had when it had first been in her hair. Now it felt cold and dark like the pain he'd seen in her eyes. How did he fix this? Spinning on his heel, he went to contact the only male he'd been able to rely on his entire life.
Chapter Ten
"Nikhil!" Cirrus Kozar exclaimed, his pleasure easily heard. "Where are you? Can you tell me?"
"I am on Pontus, Manno," he told him, knowing that for once his location wasn't a secret.
"Pontus? What on Crurn for?"
"That I cannot tell you, Manno. What I can tell you is that I have found my True Mate."
"What?!!!" Cirrus didn't try to hide his shock. "Nikhil, that’s...”
"I know, Manno. I was shocked too."
"Your mother is going to be beyond thrilled!"
"You can't tell her, Manno. Not yet."
"What? Why?"
"It's why I contacted you. I need your advice."
"My advice? Nikhil, what is going on?"
"My True Mate... she is not Kaliszian, Manno."
"Not... she's Tornian?"
"No."
"Kalbaughian?"
"No."
"Not Ganglian!"
"Goddess, no! She is human."
"Human? What is a human?"
"It is a new species that we have just discovered in the last few days... Manno...”
"What is it, Nikhil?"
"I need your vow that you will not repeat anything I am about to tell you. I am not even sure the Emperor knows everything yet."
"Nikhil... you have my vow. You know I would never betray you, but are you sure you should be telling me this?"
"I need advice, Manno, and you are the only one I completely trust."
"I am honored, Nikhil, for you are one of the most worthy male's I have ever known. And that is not because you are mine, but because you have earned it. Now tell me how I can help you."
"I have harmed my True Mate, Manno."
"What? That's impossible! You will never make me believe that you would physically harm your mate."
"I didn't, but I emotionally harmed her, Manno, with my words and I do not know that she can ever forgive me."
"What did you say to her, Nikhil?"
"It seems that for her... for her species... kissing a male on the lips is not considered sacred. When I discovered this, I did not react well."
"Nikhil, you have always known that different species can have very different customs."
"Yes, but she is my True Mate, and so similar to us that I just assumed...”
"Always a mistake. Especially concerning a female, for no two are the same. It is what makes each so special. So what does her species consider sacred?"
"I do not know. She was so angry at me for comparing her to a Pleasure Worker that she refused to tell me. And then later...”
"You compared your True Mate to a Pleasure Worker?!! Nikhil, how could you possibly...”
"She has kissed other males, Manno! On the lips! Would Mother do that? Would you be able to accept it if she did?"
"No. Never. But then your mother is Kaliszian and would respond as a Kaliszian. Your True Mate is not. What you need to do, my male, is find out what she considers sacred. Perhaps it is something we do not."
"But what?
"She's given you no clue?"
"Clue?"
"Son, females are always giving you clues. Clues to what they like. Clues to what they don't like. A male only has to actually to listen to know."
"She said something about how while she had kissed two men on the lips, that was all she had done. That she hadn't offered her friendship to any male."
"And that didn't tell you what she held sacred? What she wanted to offer only to her True Mate?"
"She said they don't have True Mates, but what they called Soul Mates. That they also have no outward sign of who that is, like we do with our bead. Only a belief in the person and a trust."